josh.casement
Aug 24, 2010, 11:04 AM
My girlfriend and I put a deposit on an apartment in the beginning of summer, after we both graduated college. She was really eager to get a place, and did a lot of the apt searching and we found one. So then my girlfriend and I have had a rocky month or so. I was negative all the time and she distanced herself with her work friends. She had a work party to go to, and I called her at midnight saying goodnight and found out she was still there. We were both going away to separate locations for a few days, we set up a plan to see each other. I come over and the next day and her house was torn apart by the after party she had until four am. I got mad and expressed that I didn't feel comfortable with her partying with people I don't know, and I left.
She went to away and we texted trying to figure things out (stupid I know). A few days later she said she wanted space, and I nagged her for answers, which I didn't get. We continued to text, and she kept saying she didn't know how she felt. Another few days went by and she went away again to spend time with her mom at their vacation house. We had plans to meet up on Sunday to talk, and when that day came I called and asked if we were still meeting and she gave me a story about how there was traffic and we wouldn't be able to meet. I pushed it and drove an hour north to talk, and things seemed fine after.
She said she was at a transition period in her life after her summer camp job ended and with a new job starting. She wanted to take it slow and start over and "date" me.
The next day she calls me and says she doesn't know what she wants in her life, and that she wants to date me but have the option of seeing other people, and that we shouldn't talk about it if we hook up with people.
Through texts she has said the following:
I don't know what I want and I have to figure it out. I don't expect you to wait around for me so if that means losing you then I lose you. I need to be sure were meant to be.
She then proceeds to make plans with me for dinner a few nights later.
She then says:
If you can't handle being with me like this I understand. I do love you and it kills me to do this. All I want is independence and freedom. No labels or commitments, which is asking a lot. I can't say that ill still feel like this in a week or a month but its how I feel right now. It kills me that I'm hurting you but it isn't right to be with you when I'm not positive.
She took our Facebook relationship status away, and told me she wasn't taking our "real" relationship away, she just didn't want to have to answer people about it.
After all that we have plans on dinner...
What do I do.
We've been together for 2.5 years, spending pretty much all our time with each other, splitting time staying at both of our parents houses.
We got in a rut, and when we were hanging out we were just not interested in each other or mad whenever we were at our parents houses, but when we were doing things like going to weddings and going out with friends it was happiness.
She wouldn't listen to me and I would be verbally abusive which I know isn't right at all. I have a major problem with anger management, and am very uptight about a lot of things. She suggested me to see a specialist about my anger which I have agreed to.
She says she wants to work out our problems, but doesn't know if we can...
She hasn't really partied like that before without me there, a couple of times since our "break".
She says she wants to date and "start over" and take it slow and see each other a few times a week. She says she wants it to be exciting and fun, which I can see cause we were in a rut before.
She went to away and we texted trying to figure things out (stupid I know). A few days later she said she wanted space, and I nagged her for answers, which I didn't get. We continued to text, and she kept saying she didn't know how she felt. Another few days went by and she went away again to spend time with her mom at their vacation house. We had plans to meet up on Sunday to talk, and when that day came I called and asked if we were still meeting and she gave me a story about how there was traffic and we wouldn't be able to meet. I pushed it and drove an hour north to talk, and things seemed fine after.
She said she was at a transition period in her life after her summer camp job ended and with a new job starting. She wanted to take it slow and start over and "date" me.
The next day she calls me and says she doesn't know what she wants in her life, and that she wants to date me but have the option of seeing other people, and that we shouldn't talk about it if we hook up with people.
Through texts she has said the following:
I don't know what I want and I have to figure it out. I don't expect you to wait around for me so if that means losing you then I lose you. I need to be sure were meant to be.
She then proceeds to make plans with me for dinner a few nights later.
She then says:
If you can't handle being with me like this I understand. I do love you and it kills me to do this. All I want is independence and freedom. No labels or commitments, which is asking a lot. I can't say that ill still feel like this in a week or a month but its how I feel right now. It kills me that I'm hurting you but it isn't right to be with you when I'm not positive.
She took our Facebook relationship status away, and told me she wasn't taking our "real" relationship away, she just didn't want to have to answer people about it.
After all that we have plans on dinner...
What do I do.
We've been together for 2.5 years, spending pretty much all our time with each other, splitting time staying at both of our parents houses.
We got in a rut, and when we were hanging out we were just not interested in each other or mad whenever we were at our parents houses, but when we were doing things like going to weddings and going out with friends it was happiness.
She wouldn't listen to me and I would be verbally abusive which I know isn't right at all. I have a major problem with anger management, and am very uptight about a lot of things. She suggested me to see a specialist about my anger which I have agreed to.
She says she wants to work out our problems, but doesn't know if we can...
She hasn't really partied like that before without me there, a couple of times since our "break".
She says she wants to date and "start over" and take it slow and see each other a few times a week. She says she wants it to be exciting and fun, which I can see cause we were in a rut before.