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View Full Version : Yet another girlfriend needs space questions with a twist.


neofreo
Aug 1, 2010, 07:18 AM
Hey Guys

Saw a lot of advice on here though id try and get some of you as well :P

So I've been with my girlfriend for about 2 years, we have been
Doing great lately. At the start I was hesitant to dive in and scared her with a lot of time saying 'i think we need a break' however that never actually ended up happening we would just talk and things would go back to normal. For the first year I was really hesitant eventually figuring everything out and I opened my heart to her and everything. She used to always tell me how she never wants to let me go.

Some time back I told her that the same. And I think that's when it kicked in and she spent sometime trying to figure if she meant that or not. She now tells me that she feels that 'i am the right person' . Though she recently made a bunch of new friends and is always hanging out with them and tells me she needs her space and she wants her friends to her self.

I personally feel like she is bored of me and prefers having fun with her friends. I just want some advice on what to do. Do I just leave her and give her space or do I stay on it like she did with me. The only reason we are together is cause she tried so hard at the start and I truly have fallen for her. I am not sure if I should try as well or just wait for her.

Thanks
Neo


I am not sure how to edit posts yet but I wanted to mention that she has asked for her space a few times. And when I have gotten mad about her spending time with her friends she was there to talk to me and was willing to cancel her plans with them for me

talaniman
Aug 1, 2010, 09:42 AM
Why can't you let her have fun with her friends, and do other things that you enjoy. Seems to me like she would love you for it. I have never wanted any female to cancel her friend time to be with me, nor would I sulk about it either. That's insecure and needy and very smothering. Also not very mature, or attractive.

Let her enjoy herself, and have your own friends, and activities.

neofreo
Aug 1, 2010, 09:51 AM
I understand what your saying and I really don't mind giving her space. But is it really OK for her to spend everyday with her friends and not see me for a month?

How would you treat this? I am not sure if I should just fully forget about her and wait for her to message me or should I just go about normally and message her once in awhile?

talaniman
Aug 1, 2010, 09:56 AM
Thanks for being more informative, it makes a difference. Maybe its to late for you and her in the romance department but no way do I still have a relationship after even a few days of being ignored. I would have been looooooong gone.

Balance is understandable, but being ignored for a month is not happening.

neofreo
Aug 1, 2010, 10:03 AM
Thanks.

But we still talk quiet a bit through texts except when she is out or w/e. And like I said she is willing to break her plans for me but that is only when I get mad/sad.

I understand what your saying but I feel obligated to still trying with her because of what I went through with her at the start. She made a huge attempt at making it work even when I told her multiple times I'm not sure about it and think I need a break. But that is the past. She still brings it up when I tell her how hard I'm trying and tell me that she felt the same and tried for those 6 months. I feel she is just taking me for a guilt trip.

I have prepared myself for w.e happens but would still like to try before giving up. She also told me that she wasn't sure if I was 'right' for her and that was an excuse as to why she has been behaving like that for a few weeks. But even after telling me that she seems to be behaving the same and is not asking for space.

Thanks a lot for the replies by the way

talaniman
Aug 1, 2010, 06:10 PM
Stepping back, and gathering facts, is not giving up, but taking a second look with more knowledge.

Balancing your life with things you enjoy without her, is a healthy way to approach any situation, and brings you clarity, and understanding.