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nic184
Jul 15, 2010, 03:23 AM
My daughter 3, son 6, niece and nephew both 10 were playing together yesterday which is nothing unusual. When I took my daughter to the toilet I noticed a little scrape blood on her vagina. At first I thought I need to take her to hospital but it them became evident to be that someone had touched her. The 2 older children had disappeared by this stage and when I asked my son he said maybe he knocked her by accident but I had the feeling that he was lying or hiding something. After asking the other 2 kids it emerged that my son had put his hand across her private parts. I don't understand how she was bleeding, or why the older kids disappeared without telling me or anyone else. I have since asked my son why and he told me that a boy at school has been doing it to him. I truly can't make any sense out of this. I am ashamed to talk to anyone about it. Is it my adult mind over thinking into this? Please help I don't know what to do!!

peachesndell3
Jul 15, 2010, 03:46 AM
No hunny I am a mother of 3 and I would definitely look into it ask your dauhter and go have her checked!! And as for your son get to the bottom of it it is your children by all means protect them call the police or whatever that is nt good that is how molestation happens take it from personal experience!

ScottGem
Jul 15, 2010, 05:39 AM
Based on what you said, the answer to the question posed in your subject is neither. This appears to be an imitation of behavior that he is being subjected to.

What you need to do is first explain to them both about inappropriate touching. You can find books in the library that can help you with what to say. Tell then that is anyone touches them inappropriately, they need to tell you immediately.

Then you need to go to the school and talk to the principal about this. The boy that has been touching your son may be a victim of abuse so you need to get to the bottom of this immediately.

Do NOT feel embarrassed to talk to them. However, don't talk to them as an irate parent either. Simply be a concerned parent that is looking to nip inappropriate behavior in the bud and one who is concerned both for the welfare of your child and other children.

nic184
Jul 15, 2010, 05:52 AM
My daughter I much to young to explain what happened. I am beside myself with worry. I am scared if I take it to the doctor/ social services they will come down hard on my son or even take my daughter.

ScottGem
Jul 15, 2010, 06:27 AM
How well do you know your doctor? If this is an isolated incident, there should be no reason for Soc Svces to be involved.

While I understand your daughter may be young to explain what happened, you should still talk to her. At 3 she can understand inappropriate touching.

mommyhelp
Aug 31, 2010, 09:06 PM
As a mother of three, I would advise you to see your pediatrician and talk to him/her about your fears. Don't let this go. If she was 16 and got raped would you file a police report or just let it go? Protect your daughter, and she needs to grow up knowing that what happened to her was not her fault (or yours) that people or children can NOT get away with hurting her. This will instill more self respect in her and about her body and no-one has the right to hurt her like that and they need to be punished. That is the way of our society, don't let her grow up feeling helpless. This is serious and you need to take action. Good luck.

mommyhelp
Aug 31, 2010, 09:08 PM
Your son may have been threatened to say nothing. Be aware of all possible factors.

JoeCanada76
Aug 31, 2010, 09:20 PM
Protect both your son and daughter.

It does not sound like your taking it series. The son said that this has been happening to him. Do you not want to find out what is going on and get to the bottom of who or what he is learning this from??

Kitkat22
Aug 31, 2010, 09:31 PM
Protect both your son and daughter.

It does not sound like your taking it series. The son said that this has been happening to him. Do you not want to find out what is going on and get to the bottom of who or what he is learning this from???????

Take your daughter to see her doctor. Go to school and find out what is happening with your son. Do it today. You seen so calm about this. Go today!

hheath541
Aug 31, 2010, 09:56 PM
I agree with what everyone has said. You need to talk to your doctor. Maybe he can even get your son to show exactly how the other boy is touching him.

Have a sit-down with your son. Stay calm, and make it clear that you're not mad at him. If you come off sounding curious and eager, he might be more likely to talk to you. Once you have all, or most, of the details, explain to both of them what to do if someone touches them in a way they don't like. Use simple words and explanations, and keep your voice calm and level. You don't want to scare them into thinking it's something they need to hide.

If you DO find out there was more to what happened to your daughter than you were told, try NOT to take your anger out on your son. He's too young to really understand that it's wrong, without having it explained to him. It's also not sexual at that age. They don't even have the ability to sexualize anything for a few more years.

mommyhelp
Aug 31, 2010, 10:01 PM
Don't be scared about children services getting involved, they may be more help then you know, and welcome it for the sake of your kids. You did nothing wrong. However if you let it go you did something wrong there.

asking
Aug 31, 2010, 10:06 PM
I agree with ScottGem. Keep your head, but be alert and find out what's happening at school.

This might help.

The Advocacy Center: Inapropriate Touching Between Children (http://www.theadvocacycenter.org/adv_abusetouch.html)

mommyhelp
Sep 28, 2010, 06:42 PM
I really hope you have come across some resolution about what has happened to your children. I truly hope that you have gone to someone to talk to about this. I know if this was about my kids I would be all over the place to figure out what is happening. Don't just let this go PLEASE.

mrshodges
Sep 29, 2010, 08:02 AM
At first I thought I need to take her to hospital but it them became evident to be that someone had touched her.
Taking her to the hospital because someone touched her is actually a good thing to do.