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View Full Version : I'm 14 coming on 15. I've met this girl, but I don't know what to do


Orky_Kultur
Jun 29, 2010, 03:27 PM
Right, so basically, my school organises an activity/worship weekend which the Christian community there can go on. Last year, while there, I met a girl who was the daughter of one of the teachers (she is now in year 8). We liked the same things, laughed at the same jokes and generally got on well together. After we left, I spent a short period where my mind frequently reverted back to thinking about her when left to its own devices, but this gradually went away as I began to focus on various hobbies (my mind works by always having something hovering in the background, and this switches to another hobby, with which I become obsessed for a period, on a regular basis). However, I recently attended the weekend again this year, and to my astonishment found myself trailing around after her every step - I never wanted to be away from her for very long.
My situation is complicated by a variety of factors:
The girl does not go to my school, although goes to one near it, and so we have never actually met outside of the weekend
Having what I frequently describe to myself as a 'Terminal lack of Self-Confidence', I am never even sre of my feelings or the bes course of action even at the best of times
I have never been even reotely near to asking out or being attracted to a girl before
I find it harder still to determine what I actually think about many things as I have a horrid habit of analyzing my own thoughts, assessing them and placing them in various contexts that it quickly becomes unclear what the actual thoughts were in the first place
I'm a fat know-it-all who hates anything that makes other people seem right over myself
A few of the other attendees of the weekend appear to have twigged to my obsession. It's killing me to type this, particularly as they could be reading this at any time (you'll know it's you if 'Blue Spots ftw' and being half-drowned in an over-chlorinated swimming pool bear any significance to you)

Any help available would be much appreciated - the internet, so useful across such wide-ranging topics as Francois Truffaut and the trigger cell of a venus fly trap, seems thus far devoid of any advice to teenagers save on how and when to get a woman into bed and how to avoid lust (I don't believe I am suffering from lust, as I do not fantasize or get particularly aroused by thoughts of the girl in question, which by general consensus appear the most common symptons).

Homegirl 50
Jun 29, 2010, 03:34 PM
What is it you want to do?
Do you have her phone number, her e-mail address? You text her, you talk on the phone, get to know each other, be friends.

Orky_Kultur
Jun 30, 2010, 09:39 AM
What is it you want to do?
Do you have her phone number, her e-mail address? You text her, you talk on the phone, get to know each other, be friends.

Thar's kind of the problem... should I act on these 'feelings'? Will they go away if I ignore them? Are they the reason why the whole of today has been absolutely unengaging and a bit depressing?

Orky_Kultur
Jun 30, 2010, 09:42 AM
Do you have her phone number, her e-mail address? You text her, you talk on the phone, get to know each other, be friends.

Oh, and no, I don't. Much to shy to ask at the time, and she does not appear to have Facebook (sensible girl).

Homegirl 50
Jun 30, 2010, 09:58 AM
They may just go away. Do you to see each other often? If not, the feelings may only come out when you see her.

If you want to talk to her you will find a way to do it. Do you have mutual friends, someone who knows her e-address or phone number?