I need help because my ex didn't put me on the birth certificate,I'm getting access now but she keeps changing it saying I can see her than I can't so I just want it all sorting out and need advise on how to do it so I can get set access to stick to

What do you mean by access? Do you want visitation with the child?

If so you go to Family Court (or whatever it's called in your area) and file for visitation. The Court will order DNA and settle paternity. Then, if you are not a danger to the child, you will receive visitation and most probably be ordered to pay child support (even though those are separate issues).

First you need visits, and ability to take the child to your home for the weekends and more,

You file a motion for either joint custody of the child, or for visitation of the child. You ask for what visits you want.
You will then get a court order for a DNA test.

What do you mean by access? Do you want visitation with the child?

If so you go to Family Court (or whatever it's called in your area) and file for visitation. The Court will order DNA and settle paternity. Then, if you are not a danger to the child, you will receive visitation and most probably be ordered to pay child support (even though those are separate issues).

I have visition but not a paper lol she allows me to have it but wouldn't let me be named as father

Then you have no LEGAL rights unless/until you file for them in Court.

I would but I'm scared its going to cost too much to get it al done because I've been made unemployed resently and got a family to pravide for and I am just managing to do that

Then the mother of the child gets to decide when, where and how you see the child because you have no legal rights. In some States there is financial help available but only the Court in your jursidiction would know that.