cordata
Dec 11, 2006, 07:28 PM
Ok, here goes. This question has a long backstory, so please bear with me.
I was friends with someone for two years and I developed strong feelings for him. He was intelligent and funny but had absolutely zero experience with women. At a party one night I got very drunk and when we were in my room tried to kiss him (I don't remember any of this). Apparently he FREAKED out and ran outside to tell my apartment mates "She tried to kiss me and I don't know if I like her or not and I've never kissed anyone before!" Apparently I started sobbing and needed to be consoled afterwards. Now, this whole thing would have been funny, except I really liked him and I felt betrayed by him TELLING people what happened and embarrassing me. Months past and although we never talked about it, I felt like he was avoiding me. Somehow we ended up at a bar together and ended up back at his apartment with friends. He took me in his room and told me that he used to like me but liked someone else (who happens to be a racist and he is not white). He told me he was sorry for hurting me and I was willing to accept that. Then, he locked his bedroom door, turned off the lights and actually put "Casablanca" in for us to watch. The whole time he had his arm around me and kept looking at me like he wanted to kiss me. I figured he was too drunk to know what he wanted, so I made his bed for him, got him some alkaseltzer and left. The next day he called me and told me that watching the movie "was a bad idea." I then got a call from a girlfriend asking if I was OK, because apparently everyone was under the impression that left because I was upset that the guy was rejecting me in his room. What the hell... I have been there for this person when he needed me and the past and I was just shocked that he treated me so badly and that none of our mutual friends thought that he did anything wrong.
The problem is... It's been 6 months since I've seen him and we're not even in the same country but I still can't get over him. I have a photo album of pictures of him, I search for his friends online and I am insanely jealous of that girl he likes although I know she'll never feel anything for him. I keep waiting for him to realize what a mistake he made and for him to want to be with me. Right now I'm just hoping he'll send me an email on my birthday. I am pathetic.
Please give me advice on how to deal.
Thanks!
I was friends with someone for two years and I developed strong feelings for him. He was intelligent and funny but had absolutely zero experience with women. At a party one night I got very drunk and when we were in my room tried to kiss him (I don't remember any of this). Apparently he FREAKED out and ran outside to tell my apartment mates "She tried to kiss me and I don't know if I like her or not and I've never kissed anyone before!" Apparently I started sobbing and needed to be consoled afterwards. Now, this whole thing would have been funny, except I really liked him and I felt betrayed by him TELLING people what happened and embarrassing me. Months past and although we never talked about it, I felt like he was avoiding me. Somehow we ended up at a bar together and ended up back at his apartment with friends. He took me in his room and told me that he used to like me but liked someone else (who happens to be a racist and he is not white). He told me he was sorry for hurting me and I was willing to accept that. Then, he locked his bedroom door, turned off the lights and actually put "Casablanca" in for us to watch. The whole time he had his arm around me and kept looking at me like he wanted to kiss me. I figured he was too drunk to know what he wanted, so I made his bed for him, got him some alkaseltzer and left. The next day he called me and told me that watching the movie "was a bad idea." I then got a call from a girlfriend asking if I was OK, because apparently everyone was under the impression that left because I was upset that the guy was rejecting me in his room. What the hell... I have been there for this person when he needed me and the past and I was just shocked that he treated me so badly and that none of our mutual friends thought that he did anything wrong.
The problem is... It's been 6 months since I've seen him and we're not even in the same country but I still can't get over him. I have a photo album of pictures of him, I search for his friends online and I am insanely jealous of that girl he likes although I know she'll never feel anything for him. I keep waiting for him to realize what a mistake he made and for him to want to be with me. Right now I'm just hoping he'll send me an email on my birthday. I am pathetic.
Please give me advice on how to deal.
Thanks!