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sreejoyadubey
May 25, 2010, 01:05 PM
Hi,

Thanks a lot for the prompt response. I understand that I have to become a Muslim and follow the religion to the core and I have no issues regarding the same. I have my sisters married to Muslims. I honour and respect the faith as much I do for mine.

My problem is not that.. What my problem is, is that I want his parents to be aware that their son is in another relation as well even though he is enagaged to a Muslim girl. I have given everything that I could and had for this relation, my personal life, my emotions, my professional life. I had to walk away from my marriage because of this relation. He is yet to be married end of this year but I want his parents to know this and do justice to me.

What I know and believe of Islam is that if you are into physical relation with someone outside your religion, you have to get married to the same person after converting the individual. On the other hand I also want the other girl's family to know and do justice to me. I never keep him away from his regular prayers but push him in doing them. It is difficult to observe Ramadaan but I kept it for a week when he could not. I am physically, mentally and emotionally married to him.. How can I end my relation when I am married to him in everyway!

Please help me sort out my problem... I pray for the mercy of Allah to be with me.

firmbeliever
May 25, 2010, 11:41 PM
sreejoyadubey,

It sounds like he is cheating on both you and the girl he is to be married.

Has he ever mentioned marrying you and was your relationship going on when he got engaged to another?

Also, as you said you have walked away from your own marriage to be with him?Do you mean that you actually got a divorce to be with this man?Or were you having an affair while being married? I ask this because, it seems like both of you have other commitments either before or after this relationship began.



If he has committed to marrying you, then it is him who should tell his parents and it is not right for the girl and her family to find out about this from a stranger.

And even if you have given everything to this relationship,it cannot be equal to being married to him.
In Islam, there should not be any physical relationship outside of marriage.
Also if you are to revert to Islam, you will have to follow all the basic pillars and fasting the whole month of Ramadan is an obligation upon every muslim.


It doesn't sound like a very promising relationship, as his family will want him to honour his engagement and it is unfair of him to drag this girl into a marriage where he plans to marry you as well (if he has promised to marry you).

He should sort this mess and do the right thing by either giving up his engagement and marrying you or inform his fiancée of his intentions so she can choose to walk away.




.

talaniman
May 28, 2010, 08:19 AM
What he is doing has nothing to do with his religion, and my question is why are you letting him drag you into his shame, and dishonor? He has clearly shown you he is not an honorable man, and lies and cheats so why not instead of trying to save him from himself, leave him alone to answer for his own actions. From his God, and his people.

sreejoyadubey
May 28, 2010, 12:10 PM
It is also a matter of disrespecting my emotions, values and sentiments.. will I get justice? I want his family , his parents and the girl's family to know about it.. I want to save that girl of it as well.. Sometimes I feel like dropping to his residence and tell his family and tell them to take some action.. if he is committing physically to me, he should do further justce to me...

talaniman
May 28, 2010, 04:25 PM
Your desire for revenge and justice are quite understandable, but does not change the fact that you chose to believe and indulge him.

You want revenge, get a better life. I don't know about the laws and traditions of your culture, but in mine, when you go along with bad behavior, you get more of it.

So leave him alone, and get a good life, or consult a trusted older person before you do something wacky, because chances are he will laugh and his family will do nothing.

After all what justice can you get? MONEY?