I have fallen in love with my cousins ex... I first met him when I was about 16 or 17 & thought he was so attractive & had a little crush on him but never acted on it because he was with my cousin... I am now 26 and within those years my cousin & her ex had a baby together & are now separated... I probably see my cousin about 2 times a year or less & each time she talks horribly about her ex each time... but I bumped into him while out with friends & we exchanged #'s, wasn't expecting him to call but he did & now we see each other on the regular... no one really knows we are seeing each other except my best friend... we are trying to avoid the drama but its bothering me to keep it as a secret... at first I was trying to keep it just friendly but the more we spent time with each other the more I started feeling deeper for him... he is a great guy, works hard, good father, a good heart & fun to be around... I seriously don't know what to do... sometimes I feel I should just ignore him and move on but I just can't stop seeing him... dont know what to do at all :-(

Now this is a soap opera, and the deeper you fall into it, the greater the consequences with your family when the secret is out.

What a way to cause conflict in a family. Hope he is worth the trouble, in the long run, and you enjoy playing the secret lover role, and blurring the lines of a relationships with your cousins baby, daddy.

Well in my opinion I would call her up and meet with her. I would let her know that you love her and do not want to hurt her. Tell her the truth. It is hard to find people with respect for one another she should appreciate your effort at honesty. As long as she is not with him, and they have been separated for more than a few months she should have no problem. I had this sort of situation but only with a best friend not a cousin. One of my friends has a brother that was married to this girl who I became close friends with. She done him dirty and left him with her kids. When we started seeing each other we told her and she went a little nutty for about 2 weeks but now we get along great. She just had to know that I was going to be good to her kids. Needless to say me and him are engaged to be married next June and we have a beautiful baby girl that was just born in feb. I raise her kids like they are my own. It all depends on the maturity of all the adults in the situation. THE LONGER YOU WAIT TO TELL HER THE WORSE IT WILL BE. ( I would leave out the part about the teenage crush it may lead her to think things that are not relevant to your situation.)