I only went out with someone for 9 weeks! At 43 years of age, you would think that I would no better! I was going through a rough patch at work and knew that I was going to have to approach my boss (I won't go into the details), to have this situation sorted out! I actually was going to have to open a can of worms at work and I thought I may even be asked to leave as it could have caused a really bad atmosphere at work!

Anyway, I had told my boyfriend all about what was going on, he seemed to be understanding but I didn't get the impression that he was fully there for me. I left work to go on holiday on the Friday and went home feeling really low, bought some wine and got really drunk! This continued over the weekend, and my boyfriend ended the relationship as he said he didn't like seeing me drunk. We both have been out (and in) and both have got quite drunk, but it had never been a problem. He couldn't understand that I was just losing myself because of what I was going through at work. I know now that I didn't handle this situation very well but no matter how much I have apologised, he just doesn't want to know.

It's been a month now since I last saw him. I contacted him last night for a chat and we seemed to get on. He even agreed to come to my flat tonight, then he changed his mind and said "he couldn,t deal with this". Then he went on to say that it was over between us and he hung up.

Things have been sorted out at work, but it has cost me my relationship. I am totally heart broken and now don't know how to handle this. I know 9 weeks is not a long time, but in the space of that 9 weeks, we were together all the time. He kept telling me that he loved me and that he couldn't see his life without me in it! I am very confused? My head is telling me one thing but my heart is telling me something totally different! I need to speak to someone about this before I go mad!

Then you listen to your head.

After such a short time,it isn't really love,as love takes time to grow.

He doesn't want to know,that's the hard truth of it and you need to let it go.

Get busy see friends and stay off the booze.

Using alcohol as a crutch to get through bad times is a bad choice.

Now that the job situation is sorted out,take it from there and move on.

Dating for only 9 weeks really wasn't long enough to be able to call it a romantic relationship.

You'd be better off to just forget about him and move on with your life.

Sorry Tessa, that's not love. The alcohol with you being drunk did him in. Guess it was all too much for him. It's not the answer too your problems at work, to go home and get drunk. You need to move on, just like he did.

Well the booze didn't help, but you found out his words were LIES. The first hint of a problem he cuts and runs, not that I blame him after only 9 WEEKS, but its obvious you don't need that kind of a person for a relationship (9 weeks!! ), nor need to solve your problems by getting drunk.

Yes, move on, and good luck.

Harshness warning

When booze starts to affect a romantic relationship, that's never a good sign. At this point, instead of worrying about your boyfriend, you should be worrying about yourself. Pick yourself up. Get your act together. If you can't even take care of yourself, then how can you bring someone into your life?