I'm 14 and I'm seeing an 18 year old. I live in canada. I looked this up but I'm not sure if my resourses are good.
Close-in-age—while most legislation dealing with age of consent sets a single age under which sexual relations are illegal, some jurisdictions (such as Canada[4]), have adopted close-in-age exemptions. In Canada the age of consent is 16, but there are two close-in-age exemptions: teenagers who are 14 or 15 may have sex with a partner who is less than five years older, and children aged 12 and 13 may have sex with a partner who is less than two years older. In the United States, these exceptions are colloquially known as "Romeo and Juliet" laws.

Is this OK? Am I covered by the close in age thing? Or can my boyfreind be charged with statatory rape?

Nope 18 is a adult and he will be in jail with a new "girlfriend" named bubba.

Hi, chantelle1212!

From where did you get the quotes of statutes, please?

Thanks!

He can get charged with statutory rape if the two of you had sex because he is a legal adult and you are a minor.

And if your parents disapprove it could get messy. There's no reason that I can think of why an 18-year-old guy would want to date a 14-year-old girl for any reason other than sex. It's a sad truth. The only other thing that occurs to me is that he's VERY immature and looking to get some, or manipulative and looking to get some.
I say if you really care about him then break up with him to avoid the risk of him getting sent to jail.

And beyond rape, there is interference with custody if parents have a problem and you go off with him against their wishes ( since he is an adult and you are a child)

Clough

I can't find the exact site that I found it but here is another quote with the link

It is important to understand that The Criminal Code of Canada does not criminalize non-exploitative, consensual sexual activity with or between persons who are 16 years of age or older, unless it takes place in a relationship of trust or dependency, in which case sexual activity with young persons can constitute an offence, notwithstanding their consent. The law still allows consensual activity where the complainant is 12 years of age or more but under the age of 14 years, amending subsection 150.1(2) to simply state that the accused must be less than two years older than the complainant.

A new subsection, 150.1(2.1), sets out new rules where the complainant is 14 years of age or more but under the age of 16 years. In these circumstances the accused must be less than five years older than the complainant (the so-called “close in age” exception) or be married to the complainant. There is another new subsection, 150.1(2.2), that makes transitional provisions for an accused referred to in subsection 150.1(2.1) who is five or more years older than the complainant. In this case the defence of consent may be used successfully if the accused is the common-law partner of the complainant, or has been cohabiting with the complainant in a conjugal relationship for a period of less than one year and has had or is expecting to have a child as a result of the relationship.


Canada's new laws-sexual consent - Political Forums (http://www.mapleleafweb.com/forums//index.php?showtopic=10958)

And beyond rape, there is interference with custody if parents have a problem and you go off with him against thier wishes ( since he is an adult and you are a child)

I had to spread the rep but I was going to say something like that, because I saw someone (probably you) had posted it on a previous board, but I wasn't sure if I should. Good call. :)

14 and 18 are not close, there may be a difference in the sentence since he is under 5 years, so he only does one year not 10.
And of course he can use that in his defense by his attorney after they change him and he has sat in jail till he makes a bond.

I know that he just doesn't "want some" because we've been together for a wile and he hasn't touched me. He's not that kind of guy. Its serious but not that serious. I just need to know these things because I really like him and I don't know what to do. Someone said to break up with him if I really care about him..
But I want to get all of my facts straight and see if I can avoid that.

i know that he just doesnt "want some" because we've been together for a wile and he hasnt touched me. hes not that kind of guy. its serious but not that serious. i just need to know these things because i really like him and i dont know what to do. someone said to break up with him if i really care about him..
but i want to get all of my facts straight and see if i can avoid that.

Well here's my question for you. Do your parents know and do they approve? How long has "A while" been?

Well here's my question for you. Do your parents know and do they approve? How long has "A while" been?

My mom knows him, but doesn't know that were together. A wiles been almost 5 months

Don't worry he will... Do you're parents really know about this guy? You need to be grounded and made to stay at hme till you understand you are playing with fire.


You are much too young to date but I see by the slang you use you must know something about it. Stay on the porch with the puppies little girl, the big dogs are much to old for you

my mom knows him, but doesnt know that were together. a wiles been almost 5 months


BAD call.

BAD call.





When did you start dating? Give yourself time to grow up. If the guy hasn't made a pass maybe he knows he'll get into trouble and you are enabling him. Grow up kid and maybe when you're sixteen you'll find someone who is your age,:rolleyes:

When did you start dating? Give yourself time to grow up. If the guy hasn't made a pass maybe he knows he'll get into trouble and you are enabling him. Grow up kid and maybe when you're sixteen you'll find someone who is your age,:rolleyes:

That's most definitely a good way to put it. :)

Don't worry he will... Do you're parents really know about this guy? You need to be grounded and made to stay at hme till you understand you are playing with fire.


You are much too young to date but I see by the slang you use you must know something about it. Stay on the porch with the puppies little girl, the big dogs are much to old for you

I'm not a little girl and I'm mature for my age. I've been through more in my life than most people go through in a life time. I know how it must seem to you guys but that's because your not me and you don't know my boyfriend.

im not a little girl and im mature for my age. ive been through more in my life than most ppl go through in a life time. i know how it must seem to you guys but thats because your not me and you dont know my boyfriend.

The first two lines have been used since forever. They're clichés and I don't give mucy sympathy to general statements that anyone can make. You have to tell me more than that. Especially since most of the time it's young teens that use them. For some reason every teenager thinks that their troubls are worse and more important than anyone else's. I'm not saying you haven't been through some tough stuff, I'm sure you have, but those are very arrogant statements, and it's just irritating to me that one so young as yourself thinks that she has lived long enough to experience the really hard stuff, and that for some reason, you are the ONLY one to go through those situations. Seeing as you're only 14, most people your age haven't really experienced real life. I can be positive that out of all of th 6.5 billion people in this world, the majority of them have been through more in their lifetimes than you have in your 14 years.

EDIT: please don't take this as completely disregarding your situations, because I'm not, but the statements in general irritate me. If you need to talk about the rough stuff, I'll be more than glad to be supportive and helpful.

im not a little girl and im mature for my age. ive been through more in my life than most ppl go through in a life time. i know how it must seem to you guys but thats because your not me and you dont know my boyfriend.

Tell us about you sweetie.. What are some of the things you have gone through? We don't know you! You don'tknow us! You want advice we'll give you advice! I just hate to see a kid throw her life down the drain. What sort of grades do you make? What is your GPA? Where is your Dad?

My dad was murdered when I was eleven. That is where my dad is. Less than a year later my sister was diognosed with lukimia. Tell me that I haven't been through a lot. I make straight a's except for the odd b. you want to here about what I've been through ohsohappy, {personal info edited out}

my dad was murdered when i was eleven. that is where my dad is. less than a year later my sister was diognosed with lukimia. tell me that i havent been through a lot. i make straight a's except for the odd b. you want to here about what ive been through ohsohappy,

As I've stated before, I believe that you've been through a lot, I just hate general statements. If you wish to discuss your feelings about these things there are forums for Beravement and family& people. That would be where they would be better discussed. I am in no way disregarding your situations, just the statements. I have my reasons for that, it's nothing personal.

As I've stated before, I believe that you've been through a lot, I just hate general statements. If you wish to discuss your feelings about these things there are forums for Beravement and family& people. That would be where they would be better discussed. I am in no way disregarding your situations, just the statements. I have my reasons for that, it's nothing personal.

Sorry for kind of snapping but I use general statements because that's the easiest way to explain myself. Its not an excuse but I've changed since my dad died. I don't go to councellers or any of that crap because they don't understand either. There's really no point.

I think it's important to treat chantelle1212 and other young people with respect. I feel that many of the remarks here, though well meaning, were patronizing and a bit insulting. I don't blame chantelle for reacting negatively to the tone of the advice given here. A 14 year old is young and inexperienced in many ways, but not a child either. All 18 year old boys are not cads either. I don't think it's right to give advice based on stereotypes. If you don't know enough about someone's situation, please ask more questions.

my dad was murdered when i was eleven. that is where my dad is. less than a year later my sister was diognosed with leukemia. tell me that i havent been through a lot. i make straight a's except for the odd b. you want to here about what ive been through ohsohappy, .

Sweetie.. I'm so sorry for your loss. It is a horrible time for you. Grief causes us to do many things we wouldn't normally do. Just think about this; Would your Dad want you to be with an older guy? I'm sure your mother is so overwhelmed she doesn't have time to watch your every move.

Think about what you are doing. You make good grades and you can write your own ticket when you graduate. Make your mom and Dad and your sister proud. Most of all be proud of yourself. We are here to help you. If you will listen we will be able to do that.. :)

Its just different too because I know that seeing him is wrong.. but liking him as much as I do over powers that. My mom knows him and likes him, but a crutial part in that is that she doesn't know where dating. He's been in my life since I can remember. I know that if he weren't so much older than me, than my parents wouldn't care.
The question is... what do I do??

sorry for kinda snapping but i use general statements because thats the easiest way to explain myself. its not an excuse but ive changed since my dad died. i dont go to councellers or any of that crap because they dont understand either. theres really no point.

I didn't mean to be so patronizing either. I'm kind of in a funk myself. My Grandfather died and his funeral was today so my mood is a bit wacky and for some reason I felt the need to be critical. The tone was all wrong. My bad. :)

its just different too because i know that seeing him is wrong.. but liking him as much as i do over powers that. my mom knows him and likes him, but a crutial part in that is that she doesnt know where dating. hes been in my life since i can remember. i know that if he werent so much older than me, than my parents wouldnt care.
the question is.... what do i do???

Whatever your parents would approve of. :)

I didn't mean to be so patronizing either. I'm kind of in a funk myself. My Grandfather died and his funeral was today so my mood is a bit wacky and for some reason I felt the need to be critical. the tone was all wrong. My bad. :)

Its OK. I completely understand. :)

Whatever your parents would approve of. :)

Well that's 50-50. My mom likes and dad liked him, but the age thing screws that up.

well thats 50-50. my mom likes and dad liked him, but the age thing screws that up.

You should be honest with them before you can really know for sure. I think that's the best thing you can do.

I don't know. Think ill talk to my mom and see what she says tomorrow. Ill see how much trouble I'm in.

idk. think ill talk to my mom and see what she says tomorrow. ill see how much trouble im in.

Good plan. :)

well thats 50-50. my mom likes and dad liked him, but the age thing screws that up.

Just a suggestion.. Talk with mom about it. Chantelle what really makes me uneasy is the law against this. If you should and ( I'm not saying you will)decide to have sex with him.. he will be the one in trouble.

I just wish there were a way to make you happy. Either way you're going to be sad. If you break up with him or choose to stay with him and the relationship moves into the intimacy stage he loses and so do you. Think about it hon.. I wish I could make you feel better!:)

Just a suggestion..Talk with mom about it. Chantelle what really makes me uneasy is the law against this. If you should and ( I'm not saying you will)decide to have sex with him..he will be the one in trouble.

I just wish there were a way to make you happy. Either way you're going to be sad. If you break up with him or choose to stay with him and the relationship moves into the intimacy stage he loses and so do you. Think about it hon..I wish i could make you feel better!:)

Neither way... I've got to tell my mom and its only going to make things worse. But if I tell her now and she knows that all I've done is kiss him, then she won't be as mad as she would be if I did more...

Its just that I don't want to get him into trouble because I really do care about him...

And then there's the fact that breaking up with him won't stop that.

neither way... ive got to tell my mom and its only going to make things worse. but if i tell her now and she knows that all ive done is kiss him, then she wont be as mad as she would be if i did more....

its just that i dont want to get him into trouble because i really do care about him...

and then theres the fact that breaking up with him wont stop that.

I believe very strongly in prayer. You really have been through a lot for your age. Talk too God and pour out your heart to him. He listens and he knows what is best for you. Talk to your boyfriend and ask him what
His feelings are. Your mom is just like the rest of us moms, she hurts when you hurt. We are here for you and tonight you will be in my prayers... Goodnight and I'll talk to you tomorrow:)

Well...

I talked to my mom. She knows how I feel about alex and everything and how he feels about me.

She says she's be fine with us going out, but that I can't avoid the law. She's glad that I talked to her before things got more serious. She's going to look into the close in age thing and stuff like that.

well...

i talked to my mom. she knows how i feel about alex and everything and how he feels about me.

she says she's be fine with us going out, but that i can't avoid the law. she's glad that i talked to her before things got more serious. shes going to look into the close in age thing and stuff like that.

I'm so proud of you sweetie.. It shows you're a kind, sweet young
Lady. Your mom will help you through this. Tell her I am very sorry for the loss she and your family have suffered. God Bless You:)

I'm so proud of you sweetie..It shows you're a kind, sweet young
lady. Your mom will help you through this. Tell her I am very sorry for the loss she and your family have suffered. God Bless You:)

Thanks for you help and your regards... :) there really needs to be more people like you in the world.

thanks for you help and your regards... :) there really needs to be more people like you in the world.

Gosh you are so sweet.. You have brightened my day!:)
Bless you sweetie!:)

well...

i talked to my mom. she knows how i feel about alex and everything and how he feels about me.

she says she's be fine with us going out, but that i can't avoid the law. she's glad that i talked to her before things got more serious. shes going to look into the close in age thing and stuff like that.

You did a very good thing by talking to your mom. As long as you two aren't having sex, there really shouldn't be a big issue. I'm glad everything worked out okay for you. Sometimes parents can surprise you. You just have to give her a chance. Don't always assume how they're going to react, because that's usually how someone gets in trouble in the first place. Sometimes people actually run in to trouble by trying to avoid it.

you did a very good thing by talking to your mom. As long as you two aren't having sex, there really shouldn't be a big issue. I'm glad everything worked out okay for you. Sometimes parents can surprise you. You just have to give her a chance. don't always assume how they're going to react, because that's usually how someone gets in trouble in the first place. Sometimes people actually run in to trouble by trying to avoid it.

Ohso is right sweetie... never hide anything from your mom... she's the best friend you'll ever have and more than that , she's a mom. Bless you... :)

You are all great! I am glad Chantelle was able to open up to her mom and you guys were all so helpful and kind. I love AMHD. :)

Hope everyone's hurts are better this week. So many people have losses and challenges that make life really hard sometimes. But there are people to reach out to also.

Kk. Already in trouble so I should probably clear this up. I am 14, almost 15. The stuff with my dads true. Sister doesn't have lukimia. And there's no alex.


I lied because we were doing something in health and there was a quote that said something like 80% of information people give about sex is false. I wanted to do my own experiment to see what false information people would give me and if these question sites could be trusted. I didn't mean to bring my personal life (the stuff about my dad) into this, or lie, but people seriously pissed me off when they said something about my life not being hard or something like that.

I've had my share of mistakes and that in my life. But I would NEVER do this. As I already said, I'm sorry for lying...

It wasn't my intention.

So, well, how did we do? Did we pass the test?
Did you get a good grade?

It wasn't something that I was being graded on. I just wanted to see for myself.

I'm not sure how you did because on that thing I went on, there was the close-in-age thingy, and it has me confused.

S this wasn't homework. You just had time on your hands and pretended to be someone you aren't? Meanwhile, people spent time and energy getting information for you, trying to help you?

I wonder how many other fakers are on the boards?

As I said.. it was my own experiment...

Believe what you want. To me, your just one person who doesn't know me or anything about me.

And I am sorry for the people that wasted their time reading this or whatever..

But what's done is done and IM done explaining myself

i know that he just doesnt "want some" because we've been together for a wile and he hasnt touched me. hes not that kind of guy. its serious but not that serious. i just need to know these things because i really like him and i dont know what to do. someone said to break up with him if i really care about him..
but i want to get all of my facts straight and see if i can avoid that.



If not with this boyfriend, who are you currently sexually active with? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/child-teen-health/sexually-active-teen-708.html#post2307551

You are dating this boy and sexually active with another?

If not with this boyfriend, who are you currently sexually active with? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/child-teen-health/sexually-active-teen-708.html#post2307551

You are dating this boy and sexually active with another?






Chantelle.. A lot of young people come here looking for answers and they are legit. What you have done is not acceptable. Please look in your dictionary and find the word LIAR.

I think you could go easier on chantelle. She's just a kid. Seeking advice on the internet is a bit weird at first, especially about something really personal, and people are quite reasonably anxious about the whole process. There's never a guarantee that people are giving the whole story. I think we have to live with that.

Or she is having sex, and now wants people to think she is not, maybe because she thinks someone knows it is her and so on.

Of course, once trust is lost on a person because of false stories, one can only make up their own mind on where the truth is

I think you could go easier on chantelle. She's just a kid. Seeking advice on the internet is a bit weird at first, especially about something really personal, and people are quite reasonably anxious about the whole process. There's never a guarantee that people are giving the whole story. I think we have to live with that.


These are the law boards. The questions/answers here are from serious people seeking serious (and, hopefully, correct) advice.

Chantelle lied on several threads. When caught she simply moved to a new thread and continued to lie. This is not a question of telling the whole story. This is a question of repeatedly lying. Maybe she needs attention. Maybe she doesn't care if it's good attention or bad attention. At what point do "kids," posting on adult boards, become responsible for what they post? Or maybe "kids" shouldn't be on adult boards.

I - as well as many others - do a fair amount of research when a question such as this is asked to attempt to ensure that "we" are correct, according to where the person asking the question lives.

Other questions did NOT get answered while Chantelle played games. I spent time trying to help her, totally wasted time. Read through the thread; I'm sure she got a lot of laughs out of the sincerity of the people trying to help her. She got the benefit of the doubt for a very long time.

You think I should be easier on her; I think you should be harder on her. How much time did you spend attempting to answer her ever changing stories?

These are the law boards. The questions/answers here are from serious people seeking serious (and, hopefully, correct) advice.

Chantelle lied on several threads. When caught she simply moved to a new thread and continued to lie. This is not a question of telling the whole story. This is a question of repeatedly lying. Maybe she needs attention. Maybe she doesn't care if it's good attention or bad attention. At what point do "kids," posting on adult boards, become responsible for what they post? Or maybe "kids" shouldn't be on adult boards.

I - as well as many others - do a fair amount of research when a question such as this is asked to attempt to ensure that "we" are correct, according to where the person asking the question lives.

Other questions did NOT get answered while Chantelle played games. I spent time trying to help her, totally wasted time. Read throught the thread; I'm sure she got a lot of laughs out of the sincerity of the people trying to help her. She got the benefit of the doubt for a very long time.

You think I should be easier on her; I think you should be harder on her. How much time did you spend attempting to answer her ever changing stories?


I agree JudyKay and Fr_Chuck
She admitted to lying. How many kids do you think read her post and maybe took her advice. Sometimes I would like to reach through the
Computer and just smack them.

Based on her various posts, I think it was a real question, so I don't think you wasted your time. And your advice will be useful to anyone with a similar question, not just chantelle.

Did I spend any time looking things up for this particular question? No. The law is not my area and I wouldn't presume. Though I sometimes give other non legal perspective on law questions. And sometimes I raise questions I think are important to consider.

I've spent way too much time researching and explaining biology to people who didn't really want to know the answers to the questions they were asking, but I can't complain because nobody makes me do this.

I feel I can complain because, although nobody makes me do this, I do have a voice.

Obviously we're on different sides of the fence here.

I never post on the biology boards for that exact reason.

Is she lying? I don't know. Here are the options. I guess we all choose one (or 2 or 3): She's either sexually active or she's not; she's either on the pill AND uses condoms or she doesn't; she either has an 18 year old boyfriend or she doesn't; her father either was murdered 3 years ago (and this appears to be the truth) or he wasn't; and her sister either does or doesn't have leukemia.

She had me completely snowed. I don't believe her story now about anything. What a mean little girl.
Chantelle you really made me feel sorry for you.

Closed