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hypo06
Apr 1, 2010, 08:53 AM
I blacked out from too much alcohol. I don't remember anything. My fiancé said I came to the door at 2am screaming I was raped and my pants were down shirt off only bra and some guy chasing me? I have no clue what happened. But my vagina seemed very normal the next day, even tight like there had been no penetration what so ever.My friend said if the guy had raped me, surely he wouldn't still be running after me? What do you think?

DoulaLC
Apr 1, 2010, 01:59 PM
Did you report this? Was there anyone around where you were drinking that may have seen anything? Were you with people you could trust?
Not sure how well you would be running if you were so drunk and your pants were down... I would imagine if someone had been chasing you it wouldn't be difficult to catch up with you. Perhaps who you were with was so drunk as well that things only went so far nothing actually happened?
Often, but not always, rape will result in a fair amount of damage and remaining semen. If you feel it is likely, see your doctor for an internal exam. If it turns out you likely were raped, report it... at least as much as you can about where you were, who was there, etc.. If it turns out you weren't raped, count your blessings. Either way, I am so sorry that you have this sort of worry. Hopefully it will prove to be a lesson for being very careful when you drink.

hypo06
Apr 1, 2010, 04:36 PM
Hello, I am an alcoholic. And if you know anything about alcoholism it is a disease of the body and mind. I knew I was an alcoholic before but I never went to aa. There are 5 types of alcoholics and I am the one that thinks they can go a long time without drinking and then drink like a normal person.
In my case it had been one year. And then suddenly the craving was so strong. I think you should study a little about alcoholism, not to be condesending. You didn't know I was an alcoholic though before answering this question. I joined aa the next day after this experience. Also you can black out and walk and talk, also I have met people in my aa meeting who have driven a car while blacked out.
With this said I was with nobody I knew as I live in a foreign country and it's a bit different here. I was just walking to the convinient store near my apt. I have no recollection of this guy. I will get tests done later for stds. I am just really scared that I contracted something. Aids in Japan is a lot lower than America, but still to not know what happenes is unerving. I will try to never drink again, and will go to two aa meetings a week.
I really never knew that alcoholism is truly a disease.

hypo06
Apr 1, 2010, 04:37 PM
I guess through posting on here I could come up with an answer, but there is no real way of knowing.

hypo06
Apr 1, 2010, 04:55 PM
My concern was also that we maybe had sex. And when I saw my fiancé I just screamed he raped me. That's why I didn't report it. Another strange thing to make the story more complicated, was at some point we came back to my apt. My fiancé was at work, and didn't come home until 2am. I know we came back here because I had not taken my cell phone or my purse originally to the convinient store. When I came to my senses the next day 100$ was stolen from my purse, and a friend tried calling my phone and said a strange guy answered who said I wasn't here.
Then he cut off my cell phone. My friend was going to call the police, but she didn't know my address. Then we left again, when I came home my coat was also missing, it had my apt. key inside. Now Im worried also that this person has my apt. key. This happened over one week ago. I don't think they will come back. I know I should have reported it. But Japan is really backwards as far as human rights. They just don't talk about these things, and actually this kind of thing almost never happens in this country.
Im not sure what my question is anymore, just have a lot of anxiety about the situation.

Fr_Chuck
Apr 1, 2010, 05:04 PM
Had you called the police and had a rape kit did at the time, they may have known.

Assuming you normally have sex, no there is no way to really tell

hheath541
Apr 1, 2010, 05:05 PM
I doubt that rape almost never happens. What's more likely, is that it's either not talked about or rarely reported.

DoulaLC
Apr 1, 2010, 05:07 PM
Once again, I am sorry you have to worry about this. Yes, I do know a bit about alcoholism. As with many diseases/addictions many people feel they can control it; that they don't need any help. I am glad to hear you are going to continue receiving support. Hopefully all will be well when you have testing done.

kp2171
Apr 1, 2010, 11:13 PM
It wasn't condescending at all to call for caution when drinking, especially when blackouts are cited and possible rape has occurred... and the other questions doulalc asked were all reasonable. If anything, she's one of the most thoughtful and caring members of the site, in my opinion.

And I do echo the hope that this is a turning point, whatever has or has not happened. Most recovering alcoholics will tell you that they each had their own unique "bottom" and until they finally believed they'd hit it, they were never really going to be healthy or recovering.

Many alcoholics talk about taking that first drink as their moment of relapse... when usually relapse started long before that... when they started falling into old habits and bad mental patterns. The drink was just the signature at the bottom of the form.

Sorry to hear you are in this uncertain place.

hypo06
Apr 3, 2010, 04:10 AM
I agree she is very thoughtful and caring, thanks.

hypo06
Apr 3, 2010, 04:14 AM
I feel confident I will never drink again. I am going to aa twice a week. I don't really ever crave alcohol, but when I do drink its way too much. It was deffinitly my bottom.
Im taking this experience and running a new life with it. I just hope whoever reads what happened to me, to think about whether they are an alcoholic or not. I didn't really know 100% that I was, just because I hadn't drank in over a year. I thought alcoholics were just people who drink every day, but its not true. I learned in aa that one man went 35 years without drinking and when he retired he ended up in the hospital. Thanks everyone for being concerned enough to write on here. Ill let you know how my tests turn out. Thanks

hheath541
Apr 3, 2010, 11:08 AM
Just keep a hold of that determination. The road ahead of you is going to be hard and long. I hope you have people around you willing and able to support you in this.