I and my girlfriend are together now for 3 months we got together when I went home for vacation on December. We have a bit of a history, I knew her from more than 6 years ago. I tried courting her then but somehow it did not work out. Somehow 5 years later she said she remembered me and wanted another chance and that it was a mistake for her to let me go. At first I was not too sure if I should give it another chance, but in the end I came to a decision to give the relationship a second chance. We met up had great times and met each other's family everything seemed OK, we talked about stuff that happened in the years that we haven't been together, our ex's and other events that happened in our lives. We talked a little bit about the future albeit not really had a "serious" discussion, we talk about marriage, children, about her moving where I am and all that. When my vacation was nearing the end I wrote her a sort of letter, in this letter I wrote questions about trust, loyalty, about our feelings for each other, whether she is sure about me this time, if she had fears about us. All her answers were positive so I took it as a sign that she is willing to work on this relationship even though it will be hard as all long distance relationships are. So when I got home from vacation we immediately established communication using webcam and instant messaging. She would email me from work and sometimes email each other back and forth almost the whole day she's in the office. After that when she get home we talk online and have video calls. This became the norm. At first we would talk about anything I assumed it was all OK. But there are times when we run out of things to talk about and sometimes there's awkward silence. Also recently she has been really tired from work and having problems with family, work. So here we are almost a month after coming home from vacation and we are having our first hurdle in our relationship. Recently she has been a bit why when we talk, at those times she says she has stomach ache headache and all that, that's why she's acting up. So that's all I assumed it was, but the biggest blow up so far was the other day, she didn't email me from work the whole day which was unusual but I just assumed it was because she was really busy and left it at that, when she got home she emailed me and asked me if I was there so I log in right away and we start talking. Right away she opens up with I'm tired and I'm having a headache, so I tell her to take some medication and she snaps at me telling me that she already did, And from that the conversation went down hill, I ask her if she is OK, she tells me she's having problems at work so I tell her talk to me about it maybe I can help, give an advice or at the very least you can get it out of your chest, again she snaps back at I don't want to talk about it besides nothing will change even if I talk to you about it. So from this point I din't know what to say anymore, so I just kept quiet. So what she does is she tells me that were not talking anyway so lets just log off and she logs out and does just that without the usual I love you's and good bye's. So I call her right away from the phone and told her what I was feeling I told her I was only trying to make her feel better and she did not have to act that way towards me, she says we were not talking about anything anyway maybe just for this one day we could just not talk so I tried to leave it at that. But this event bothered me quite a bit because I felt that it was unresolved, I sent her emails telling her how I felt telling her the things I wished, that I wish I had the right words every time, that I wish I could take her pains and problems away, that I wish I could always make her laugh and smile that I know I cannot be successful all the time but I do try. I told her I found it hard to sleep that what happened bothers me a lot that all I could think about the whole night was about going back to her to feel her hug and her kiss. I knew she was at work and it would be a bad time for me to call but she did not mail me back with a response so in spite of my better judgement I tried calling her a few times until she finally mailed me back. She was not pleased at all for me doing that which I understand, so she tells me to please stop calling and put my emotions in the right place. I said I was sorry but its just that I missed her and what happened really broke me down. So I waited until she got home and waited for a response I logged in right away to see if she was on for a video call, I tried calling her to tell her that I was on but she dropped the calls. Then she tells me that she sent me an email. In the email she tells me that she was sorry about being why lately, that she could not explain herself why. That she was having lots of problems at work and with her family, that she is always tired and always tired of thinking about things, that it yes it would have been easier if I was with her. But an issue came up that I did not know about she said she was tired of her routine, that she wakes up goes to work, sends me mail, then she gets home and we talk again and sometimes we talk about things that don't really have any sense. She said she wanted to be left alone for a while to clear her head, that she will mail me once she's ready to talk again, she says she still loves me the same but just needs some time alone. So I answered her if its all right if I had something to say as well, I told her that I was sorry for the way I acted, that I missed her terribly, that I don't want to lose her again. So she answers that she does still love me and promises that she's not going anywhere.

On this note I would not say that I am an expert on relationships that is why I am here to seek advice to hear input from people, any that will be provided is very much appreciated. I am here now waiting for her to be ready to speak to me again, thinking about our relationship, what I could do or not do and so on.

Do what she asked. And leave her alone, until she is ready to talk to you.

Its not an easy thing to do, and I know it will tear your heart out, but do it because she asked you to.

I think the worst thing you can do now is NOT doing exactly as she has asked you. Yeah it sucks.

Yes I am actually doing it right now, I still miss her of course but I love her so I do as she asked me. But I am also wondering can you offer an advice or tips after this when she starts talking to me again? What are the things I could do to make our relationship stronger, how to make our conversations more interesting? Thank you in advance.

Get use to NOT talking to her, is what I suggest for now, as any advice I give you will only trigger unbearable thought to want to contact her, and I wouldn't want that. You do understand that don't you!

I understand and thank you, I was reading some things about NC, I would not go that far but I think that is a very good idea. I shall work on myself for now, I will do what I can to be better. When she's ready she'll be ready it comes when it comes. This site seems very helpful thank you to the people who post and impart their wisdom to the rest of us.