View Full Version : How to get the biological father out of your life
Kbeste
Mar 8, 2010, 11:25 AM
I'm married and when I was separated for a couple months And got pregnant. Yes I already know it was irresponsible I never thought he would come back and took two pregnancy tests and got my period before getting back together. When I found out. I told the other guy the bio father but now realize that's a mistake. He wanted me to abort and harassed me then told me it's all or nothing and he s way too involved like wants to go to doc appts but not pay for them and has his girlfriend moving in with him exactly when I'm due. I'm about. To move out of state to get away from him and it's the best thing for everyone. What can I do legally to avoid dysfunction like his girlfriend who should never be around my kid that I gave birth to not for another woman to touch. I'm like two months pregnant so if I tell him I had a miscarriage move and then the child is my husbands by law and his name will be on birth certificate. And I heard after a certain time the child is legally my husbands how long is that? I don't think thus guy will chase me to another state but if he does and tries to get custody how can I limit that we weren't married he was irresponsible as well as I but I can take responsibility and am the mother and of he doesn't bother me I won't ask him for support. It's worth keeping me sane and my child with me. Also if he ever does visit I want to make sure it's just him can I do that? I live in Florida right now if there's any state that can agree more with me let ne know. Also I have to comply to DNA test right? If he tried to do that by court. Ummm please let me know I got to make a move soon. Oh also can I say I didn't know I was pregnant when I moved to stay out of trouble if I could get in trouble they can't get a hold of my doc visits that's against hippa right? PLEASE I NEED LEGAL ADVICE
this8384
Mar 8, 2010, 12:11 PM
I'm married and when I was seperated for a couple months And got pregnant. Yes I already know it was irresponsible I never thought he would come back and took two preg tests and got my period before getting back together. When I found out. I told the other guy the bio father but now realize that's a mistake. he wanted me to abort and harassed me then told me it's all or nothing and he s way too involved like wants to go to doc appts but not pay for them and has his gf moving in with him exactly when I'm due. I m about. To move out of state to get away from him and it's the best thing for everyone. What can I do legally to avoid dysfunction like his gf who should never be around my kid that I gave birth to not for another woman to touch. I'm like two months preg so if I tell him I had a miscarriage move and then the child is my husbands by law and his name will be on birth certificate. And I heard after a certain time the child is legally my husbands how long is that? I don't think thus guy will chase me to another state but if he does and tries to get custody how can I limit that we weren't married he was irresponsible as well as I but I can take responsibility and am the mother and of he doesn't bother me I won't ask him for support. It's worth keeping me sane and my child with me. Also if he ever does visit I want to make sure it's just him can I do that? I live in Florida right now if there's any state that can agree more with me let ne know. Also I have to comply to DNA test right? If he tried to do that by court. Ummm please let me know I gotta make a move soon. Oh also can I say I didn't know I was preg when I moved to stay out of trouble if I could get in trouble they can't get a hold of my doc visits that's against hippa right? PLEASE I NEED LEGAL ADVICE
If you are married, then your husband is legally considered the father of the child. However, the biological father has rights whether you want him to or not. If he decides to file in court, you will have to comply with the court orders. Simply claiming that you don't want or trust him around your child isn't grounds to keep him from the baby.
Personally, I think "faking" a miscarriage is dysfunctional. Your situation isn't ideal and I'm sorry for that, but it is something that happened because of your choices. You cannot blame someone else for what you chose to do.
Your ex is allowed to live with whomever he wants. Is there a reason you don't want his girlfriend around your child?
No, it is not a HIPAA violation for them to request your doctor's records although I don't think it will actually go that far. However, your idea to lie in court and say that you "didn't know" you were pregnant is perjury - something not taken lightly. It could very well land you in a lot of trouble that neither you or your baby needs.
cunfuzed
Mar 8, 2010, 01:28 PM
Just speaking from experience, even if you move away, your ex can file for custody and arrange to have visits. And whenthe child gets older, it will be overnights, whether there is distance between you guys or not. As far as him being overly involved, the court will set limitations and I doubt he will be able to go with you on doctors appointments, etc. My ex is a thorn in my side as well and he was exactly like that in the beginning. He went to the first doc appointment and has only stopped by the daycare once in 3 years. Didn't even bother to ask to see my son. So don't stress yourself. Focus on your health and the baby. If he wants to be a father, don't chase him away cause it will be worse when you go to court.
stinawords
Mar 8, 2010, 09:11 PM
I'm with this on this one. Don't lie in court about it that will make you worse off. If the father wants rights then he will have to go to court for them and yes you will have to do as the court says and comply with whatever the court orders. If he wants visits he will get them if you can prove the girl friend to be a danger to the child then there are ways to exclude her from visits. But bottom line is that you didn't have a problem sleeping with the guy and I'm sure you've had a sex ed class at some point in your life so knew what the consequences could be so the court will not just look at you as some victom whose child is being stolen from her. But as of right now there is nothing either one of you can do because the child is not born yet.