I don't even know where to begin on this one, so forgive me if this all sounds absurd and complicated... sorry for the looooong post, I'm just way lost here.

Last night I was visiting my friends/roommates at college (I'm taking the semester off, so I don't live with them at the moment) and I ended up hooking up with a friend of mine. I had always had a passive interest in him, thought he was cute, etc, but never really had the urge to act on it. We were both very drunk, and he confessed to me that he's had a huge crush on me since the moment he met me 3 years ago (I had no idea). Then he started kissing me and telling me how happy he was that this was finally happening, and things progressed from there really quickly. We didn't have sex, but things went pretty far. He was just over the moon ecstatic about the whole situation and I was so taken by surprise that I didn't really know how to react, or even have time to really think about it. He's been texting me all day today about how happy he is, and I'm excited about it too. However, there are some problems with this:

1) My best friend/roommate has a crush on him. She's never acted on it, wasn't planning to either as far as I know, and doesn't even talk to him very often other than a 'hello' in passing, small talk... but she thinks he's just the cutest thing and often talks about how she would love to get with him. I've known him longer than she has, and even longer than I've known her. It isn't like I try to do it, but this isn't the first time that a guy she has been interested in has turned out to be interested in me, and although she isn't very open about it, I think it really messes with her self esteem. I told her about what happened, and she's being a good sport, but I can tell that it hurts her and I feel bad :(

2) The guy is very good friends with another guy I used to be involved with... it's a small campus, and isn't exactly a wide selection of guys, so there is a lot of overlap with friends and hookups. But the guy I used to see still tries to talk and hang out with me, and we are friends... If I end up pursuing anything with this new boy, I'm afraid that I would look like "that girl" that just hooks up with every guy in a circle of friends. I even dated another one of their friends 3 years ago. Like I said-- VERY small selection pool.

Those are the main issues, not to mention the fact that there are two more boys that I'm good friends with (not at school) that really like me and I've been trying to find a way to let down easy for a while now without losing their friendship. I just don't know how to do it... especially in this case because he is SO happy about finally getting the chance to be with me, and I would totally go for it if it weren't for my friend/his friend. My main concern is if I'm being a bad friend... should I not see him because of her, or is the damage already done? Should I sacrifice a potential relationship for the sake of her self esteem? And even if that weren't an issue, am I dating in too close of a social circle? If so, how can I tell him no without crushing him? Or should I just go for it?

I'm just terrible at this. This type of soap opera-ish situation seems to happen to me a lot (this is not even close to the most complicated I've found myself in), and I know I'm partially responsible. I just don't want to make things worse, especially since my best friend's feelings are on the line... but at the same time, I don't want to sacrifice something that I would like to pursue if I'm not in the wrong here. Sorry again for the long post, I'm just soooo sick of this type of thing happening and I would love it if anyone could give me some insight on how to deal with these sticky situations :confused:

Look, can I be honest with you here?

It's really simple. If you've got doubts - don't do it.

You're flattered by the attention, but your guts are saying 'hang on'... and, it's always important to listen to your intuition.

You sound smart and reasonably self aware. You foresee problems and an increase in the drama/soap opera levels... trust yourself.

Letting him down lightly sounds like the least of your problems. Simply tell him you were drunk, you like him but it's all too complicated.

If he's a decent person, he'll understand.

How to avoid these situations in the future? Try not to get so drunk and place so much important on having so many guys I guess. Stringing them along because YOU don't want to lose their friendship doesn't sound very considerate of THEM.

We were both very drunk,
That's as far as I had to go. This guy and you need to talk sober, and honestly. As far as everyone else goes, They are on the back burner until your thoughts are solid, where you're going.

I will agree with the above..

Listen to what your heart tells you!
You want to be with him? Be with him!

-- But try to get this friend of yours a guy to boost up her self esteem... (but make sure she won't know it was you!)

Girl,Let me just go straight2d point here: my advice... leave him alone, if he wants you let him come get you in d ryt manner... u r being cheap... nothn good coms easy... but I would lyk2know,those guyz you said you don't want2lose their frndshp,y don't u want dem2leave?