A good friend of mine has told me they just started cutting. In a really emotional 2 hour phone call I succeeded in having him promise me to stop... but what you need to know is that he's very emotional, he has been through a lot of tough things, from physical to verbal abuse; he gets upset really easily for what seems to be no reason. He gets upset with me when I'm only trying to help, and at this point he's refusing to talk to me. I see him at school and he looks at me and continues walking. I don't know if he's cutting again, and I'm really worried about him but he won't talk to me. What can I do? If you have any ideas please let me know... all I want to do is help him get through it.

Well first of all if you are that worried I would tell a counselor or someone like that who could investigate and maybe help if there is a serious problem. And yes he will probably be mad but if you are a true friend that will not matter to you. His safety will be more important. That being said, I to was a cutter till I was about 29 and grew up very similar to your friend. For me I felt alone in a crowd of people even though I had lots of friends. Felt like I was different because of ideas and thoughts I had that others did not understand. So I felt like I was numb and that's when I started to cut myself. It made me feel and I liked that. It seems strange I know but if you were a cutter you would understand. I would still be a cutter today if it was not so taboo to be one but I traded out for something more excepted by people of today and that's tattoos. I do not see any difference personally in cutting or body modification but that is just my opinion not a fact.

You probably should try to accept that it's your friend's choice about whether he cuts or not. He might stop, he might not. You should also know that it's a really difficult thing to stop once you start.

You're trying to help, but you may just be making things worse by trying to convince him not to. He's the only one that can help himself, and all you can really do as a friend is support him.

Yea, you're worried, and rightly so, can you tell your parents and ask them for their advice? Remember to let them know it's confidential.

It may be that the best thing is to leave him alone for a while - just smile and say 'hi' when you see him at school.

If your friend has been through a lot, he may feel that no one else will understand him or be able to help, and that he has to continue to cope with his problems alone, but that doesn't mean that he should (have to) keep doing this.

I know you're worried about your friend, but if he's avoiding you, don't push him to talk. I understand that you feel helpless every time he walks by and you feel the urge to do something. I know you have good intentions, but please realize that as a caring friend, your own emotions could cloud your judgment of how he should proceed.

I agree with the advice given above. Notify a guidance counsellor at school or someone else who has the training and skills in this area to handle the situation. They have the experience, knowledge and expertise to assess the situation and offer help if necessary. Your friend can't be forced to seek help, but if he's made aware that the tools are there and it's worth reaching out, he may be more likely to do so, and a counsellor would know how best to make these resources available to your friend.