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smja
Feb 14, 2010, 01:43 PM
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muhammad%27s_wives) From this source I am aware that the prophet had another wife after the death of khadijah; The women he married was Sawda bint Zama. In this source (http://www.answering-islam.org/Shamoun/sauda.htm) I found out that prophet wanted to divorce Sawda after marrying Aisha. What I don't understand is that the prophet didn't treat Sawda equally compared to Aisha and his other wives, because she was aging and he found her less attractive. Despite this Sawda told the prophet that he could have aisha on her nights as lond as he did not divorce her, because she wanted to be called on the day of judgement as his wife. If prophet is such a rightous person how can he make her compromise and treat her unequally knowing her innocence. Isn't this a wrong example set by the most perfect role model for the muslim people?

Fr_Chuck
Feb 14, 2010, 01:45 PM
Moved to Islam

Fr_Chuck
Feb 14, 2010, 01:53 PM
I will also note that none of your links come from Islamic web sites, one is wikipedia which is often wrong on a lot of info since it is provided by people and often not properly corrected and the other is a Christian site that of course would be bias toward Islam.

If your reason to asking this is for a real exchange and to learn the truth from a Musllim view point then great,

If you wish to try and attack the faith of Islam please don't, since your posts will be deleted,

We require the respect of all faiths and religions on this web site.

smja
Feb 14, 2010, 02:10 PM
I am a muslim myself, and I do not intent to attack any religion. I just hope some one will be able to answer my question.

Fr_Chuck
Feb 14, 2010, 02:14 PM
No problem, I am one of the site moderators and try to make sure there is no ( or not much) disrespect for the religions of others.
We have a few very great experts here and they will be around over the next few days to help

smja
Feb 14, 2010, 02:20 PM
Is Dr Zakir Naik one of the experts who answers questions on this site?

firmbeliever
Feb 14, 2010, 07:50 PM
The Prophet (pbuh) offered to divorce Sawda bint Zama (radiyallah anha), because she was older and thought she may find it a hardship to compete with younger wives.Not because he(pbuh) thought her unattractive but more out of mercy on her finding it hard after he(pbuh) married his(pbuh) other wives.

But Sawda bint Zama (radiyallah anha) preferred to remain with him and give up her night for Aysha (radiyallah anha) and it was her own choice to do so.

She preferred to have the honor of being known as his(pbuh) wife on the day of resurrection.

Ibn Kathir: Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) (http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html)


Regarding Dr.Zakir Naik, he does not answer questions on this site, please refer to his own site to contact him.http://www.irf.net/


.

smja
Feb 15, 2010, 07:51 AM
I understand what your saying, but why would there be a need for Sawda bint Zama to compete with his other wives if he treats all of them equally and gives them the same amount of love. It seems like she was afraid of being divorced that she had to make adjustments in away that the prophet didn't have to go to such extent, otherwise why else will she tell him to spend her nights with Aisha?

Also did he ask her permission to get married again?
I thought you are only allowed to get married if your existing wife agrees to it.

smja
Feb 15, 2010, 07:56 AM
In Islam men are only allowed to get married four times. Then why is that the prophet was allowed to get married more then that, [I think he got married 12/13 times].

firmbeliever
Feb 15, 2010, 10:00 AM
Regarding permission of first wife;
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Islam Question and Answer - A wife giving up her right to maintenance; and is the first wife?s approval needed before one can marry a second wife? (http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/13702/first%20wife)
"With regard to the permission and approval of the first wife for a plural marriage, this is not a condition and the husband does not have to seek the permission of his first wife to marry a second. But it is prescribed for him to be kind to her and to spend money and to say kind words so as to calm her down and reduce her jealousy. The Standing Committee was asked about the first wife's approval for one who wants to marry another wife. Their response was:

It is not obligatory for the husband, if he wants to take a second wife, to have the approval of the first wife, but it is the matter of good manners and kind treatment that he should speak to her kindly in such a way as to reduce the feelings of hurt which are natural in women in such cases. That is by smiling at her, showing that he is happy to see her, being kind, speaking nicely and by spending money on her if necessary. "
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firmbeliever
Feb 15, 2010, 10:05 AM
Regarding the Prophet's(pbuh) wives,

Reasons for the Prophet's Marriages
Reading Islam (http://www.readingislam.com/servlet/Satellite?cid=1123996016508&pagename=IslamOnline-English-AAbout_Islam%2FAskAboutIslamE%2FAskAboutIslamE)


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Reading Islam (http://www.readingislam.com/servlet/Satellite?cid=1123996015454&pagename=IslamOnline-English-AAbout_Islam/AskAboutIslamE/AskAboutIslamE)


3 Prophet Muhammad (may peace be upon him) married this number at a time, when the norm of the place in which he lived (Arab Peninsula in the 7th century) allowed men to marry a much larger number than that, there was no legislation to prohibit this behavior yet.

4 After that, the Divine order came to Muslims through the Qur'an, to restrict the number of their wives to a maximum of four. God said to them in the versewhat means:

*{If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.}* (An-Nisaa' 3: 3)

On hearing this order, all who men who had more than four wives divorced them, in full submission to God's orders. The divorced wives - who accepted this divine decree with full satisfaction, implied by their deep faith - soon found other marriages and lead normal lives. Nevertheless, the Prophet (may peace be upon him) - who had nine wives at the time the order was revealed - was exempted from this order in a later verse of Qur'an which gives the meaning of:

*{O Prophet! We have made lawful to thee thy wives to whom thou hast paid their dowers; ... }* (Al-Ahzab 33: 50)

This exemption was because there was a prohibition in the Qur'an for any Muslim to marry the Prophet's wives once he died or divorced them:

*{.. .Nor is it right for you that ye should annoy God's Apostle, or that ye should marry his widows after him at any time. Truly such a thing is in God's sight an enormity.}* (Al-Ahzab 33: 53)

So, it was rather inhuman for his wives to be doomed to solitude and depravity all their lives. Thus he was exceptionally permitted to keep them.

5. Looking at the circumstances, in which he married each wife, one finds that all those marriages were the furthest from being motivated simply by lust. The marriage to his first wife, Khadijah, was his only wife until she died after almost 20 years of marriage. This marriage to Khadijah covered the years of his youth. Despite the fact that these years were supposed to be the peak of his sexual demand, he did not think of taking any other wife together with her.

The rest of his wives - whom he married after her death - came at a time when he was nearly 50! Exhausted in spreading the new religion, mostly chased by the infidels and where attempts at taking his life were frequent, I, personally, don't think that this was a romantic atmosphere for anybody to go on amorous adventures!

6. Most of his wives whom he took after the death of Khadijah were old in age, devoid of beauty and were formerly married - except `A'ishah, who was the only one who was young and a virgin. This is despite the fact that he was always the target of many believing ladies, who came offering themselves to him in marriage, but then he politely apologized to them.

7. Every one of these marriages was for a reason; either political to make alliance with other tribes, or human to sustain a widow of a martyr or to honor a lady whom no body wanted to marry… etc. It was not reported that he married them out of carnal desires.

8. He was a model example of justice and kindness to them all regardless of his neutral feelings towards many of them, he would never discriminate among them or reveal the special feelings he had for Aishah rather than the others.

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smja
Feb 15, 2010, 11:17 AM
If it is suggested that the man can seek another women with out his present wife's permission. Doesn't this make the man more superior to the female gender. If so then does this mean in Islam Men are found more important and not equal to women. I think if this is the case then why can't a women seek another man without her husbands premssions. Why is it that women's decission are questioned whereas a man can get more then he has?

smja
Feb 15, 2010, 11:24 AM
But why is it the prophet later on wanted to divorce Sawda and why did she have to make certain adjustment to stay with the prophet. Wasn't the prophet happy spending time with her; Is this suggesting that you should get divorced because you do not find your wife appealing.

shahim
Aug 18, 2010, 06:40 PM
Refer sura Al Ahzab Ch 33,V 52 to 54,u will get the answer why prophet mohammed(SAW) keep all his wives.Allah gave him the permission to do so.