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View Full Version : How Do You Rid Your Mind of Worry and Fear?


Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 02:47 PM
Hi, All!

Okay, I'm going to get personal here again, like I have already about having possible skin cancer. Although, I want to be careful and not spill a lot about myself on this site that gets such excellent exposure on the Internet. I'm sure that some of the regulars here know enough about me to read between the lines...

Most mornings, I wake up terrified! It's the morning mind, where, even though the eyes are open, I'm not quite with it! Finances aren't good and business hasn't been the best. Because of the economy, a lot of people have cut back with the services for which they're willing to pay. Health is also another issue.

I would appreciate some coping strategies. Ideas from you as to how you cope, calm down and not succumb to worry and fear. Succumbing can become debilitating as well as a possible hazard to health!

I pray and read self-help sort of things. I also have a number of friends to whom I speak with frequently. Nonetheless though, I am alone. My kids are grown. I'm not lonely, but I feel very alone. There is a difference. I find myself being "frozen" a lot of times because of worry and fear. I'm also clinically depressed and not on any medication. I also get panic attacks. Just had one this morning.

What sort of things do you do to not get totally stressed out because of worry and fear, please?

Thanks!

redhed35
Jan 31, 2010, 03:00 PM
Daily medatation.. I use different cds,I listen too soothing music,or even music that's not so soothing!

I walk,I think perhaps I leave the majority of my worries on the road.

When I do get down or too worried,I try and change my thinking to something more positive,try and remember a tim in my life when I was happy and relaxed,and focus on how I felt then.

I don't really share my thoguhts or worries with others and tend to keep a journal.

I like a plan,a plan helps me focus on the end product,if its paying off a bill,or finishing an assignment.

I like lists too!

I list the things that worry me or what I need to do and then look for possible solutions.

In the morning I set my intention for the day...

Example: today is going to be filled with love,health and wealth,I am going to have a great day! then focus on the feeling of having those things in my day.

A suggestion for reading material clough is " how to get what you want and want what you have" by john gray.

Its pretty good,I tend to take what I need from books and use what I can.

justcurious55
Jan 31, 2010, 03:00 PM
Deep breaths help me the most. When I have time (which is almost never lately) to do some actual yoga, that's even better. But when I feel like I'm about to lose it, deep breaths and telling myself it'll all be okay helps me.

I haven't looked into it at all yet, but someone was telling me that there's some new studies saying having a lot of vitamin d in your diet is supposed to help with depression. If I find anything on the study they were talking about, I'll post a link here.

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 03:04 PM
daily medatation..i use differant cds,i listen too soothing music,or even music thats not so soothing!

i walk,i think perhaps i leave the majority of my worries on the road.

when i do get down or too worried,i try and change my thinking to something more positive,try and remember a tim in my life when i was happy and relaxed,and focus on how i felt then.

i dont really share my thoguhts or worries with others and tend to keep a journal.

i like a plan,a plan helps me focus on the end product,if its paying off a bill,or finishing an assignment.

i like lists too!

i list the things that worry me or what i need to do and then look for possible solutions.

in the morning i set my intention for the day...

example: today is going to be filled with love,health and wealth,i am going to have a great day!,then focus on the feeling of having those things in my day.

a suggestion for reading material clough is " how to get what you want and want what you have" by john gray.

its pretty good,i tend to take what i need from books and use what i can.

I really like your positive thinking and approach, redhed35! Why don't you share your thoughts and worries with others, please?

Thanks!

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 03:05 PM
deep breaths help me the most. when i have time (which is almost never lately) to do some actual yoga, that's even better. but when i feel like i'm about to lose it, deep breaths and telling myself it'll all be okay helps me.

i haven't looked into it at all yet, but someone was telling me that there's some new studies saying having a lot of vitamin d in your diet is supposed to help with depression. if i find anything on the study they were talking about, i'll post a link here.

When I'm having a panic attack, it's hard for me to even breath, justcurious55! Isn't the sun one of the sources for vitamin D?

I would appreciate any links that you can post!

Thanks!

redhed35
Jan 31, 2010, 03:11 PM
I really like your positive thinking and approach, redhed35! Why don't you share your thoughts and worries with others, please?

Thanks!

I don't really know how to answer that question clough,I'm a talker that's for sure,but mostly my talk is filled with cr*p!

If I do share its usually with people who know me well and know I need a sounding wall more then empathy or sympathy.

I'm not a closed book by any means,I just have sticky pages.

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 03:13 PM
I dont really know how to answer that question clough,im a talker thats for sure,but mostly my talk is filled with cr*p!

if i do share its usually with people who know me well and know i need a sounding wall more then empathy or sympathy.

im not a closed book by any means,i just have sticky pages.

What did you spill on your book! :D

redhed35
Jan 31, 2010, 03:20 PM
What did you spill on your book! :D

Have you thought about the worst case scenario?

How you would feel,what you think you would do and say?

Then play it again,but change the outcome,visualise a positive outcome,see it happen and play that scene instead.

Manafest (sp) a positive outcome.

Nothing is impossibe,we don't use all of our brains,you will never know if you don't try.

albear
Jan 31, 2010, 03:28 PM
Have you looked into or had any therapy, e.g. CBT or EFT
EFT Home - World Center for EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) (http://www.emofree.com/)

Also, have you tried anything called 'rescue remedy spray'
Rescue&reg Remedy - Official Site (http://www.rescueremedy.com/)

Or any other natural calming tablets or anything.

I agree with red about meditation, calming cds and walking, or any physical activity that you can put your all into.

Safety straterfies can help (eg planning and lists) but don't rely on them too much as its very hard to shake your dependency on them, and in the long run could add to your depression in the long run.

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 03:36 PM
have you looked into or had any therapy, eg CBT or EFT
EFT Home - World Center for EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) (http://www.emofree.com/)

also, have you tried anything called 'rescue remedy spray'
Rescue&reg Remedy - Official Site (http://www.rescueremedy.com/)

or any other natural calming tablets or anything.

i agree with red about meditation, calming cds and walking, or any physical activity that you can put your all into.

safety straterfies can help (eg planning and lists) but dont rely on them too much as its very hard to shake your dependency on them, and in the long run could add to your depression in the long run.

Are there any other natural calming tablets like St. John's Wort?

albear
Jan 31, 2010, 03:39 PM
Are there any other natural calming tablets like St. John's Wort?

Personally I use these

Kalms Tablets (http://www.kalmsstress.com/kalms-tablets.html)

J_9
Jan 31, 2010, 03:41 PM
I find Melatonin works for sleep and it gives me a calm awakening.

Clough, if you are clinically depressed medication should be a must. There are ways to pay for it, as well as the fact that many pharmaceutical companies are seeing the downward economy and many of these meds are affordable now. The one I take is only $4 a month.

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 03:41 PM
I will tell all here, that my back hurt so bad this morning and that I was having a bad enough panic attack, that I played the last two selections on the organ with one hand and just the pedals! I had to hold onto the left side of the organ with my left hand in order to keep my balance. Fortunately, I'm behind a walled-off area where I play the organ, so no one could see what I was doing. No one seemed to notice that not all of the notes were in the two pieces.

I'm calmer now, but have a lengthy rehearsal tonight with a group where one of the instruments that I play is the string bass. Another balancing issue there!

Can't miss the rehearsal. We're only allowed to miss one before a concert, and if a person does need to miss, then they'd better have a really good excuse!

They're really strict about the attendance policy!

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 03:45 PM
I find Melatonin works for sleep and it gives me a calm awakening.

Clough, if you are clinically depressed medication should be a must. There are ways to pay for it, as well as the fact that many pharmaceutical companies are seeing the downward economy and many of these meds are affordable now. The one I take is only $4 a month.

The ones that I've been prescribed have also been only $4.00. - Wal-mart.

It's the visits to the mental health center at the local hospital about which I'm worried. It's a sliding fee scale, however, I think that the minimum for anyone is $20.00 a visit.

I also feel, that if I go for counseling and subsequently get prescribed meds, that I'm just avoiding things and also spending time there when I could be getting other things accomplised.

J_9
Jan 31, 2010, 03:46 PM
Well, you could also accomplish a lot by going. Such as panic attack triggers and coping mechanisms.

Wondergirl
Jan 31, 2010, 03:50 PM
Isn't the sun one of the sources for vitamin D?
Yes, it is, but we don't get enough of it, especially in winter in Illinois. The RDA of D per day is 400 IUs. I researched this and have upped the amount I take to 4,000 IUs per day (2,000 twice a day). Have you tried glucosamine for your back and joints?

Tai chi is good for balance. Doing a few basic yoga positions twice a day might help (Google this.)

albear
Jan 31, 2010, 04:00 PM
The ones that I've been prescribed have also been only $4.00. - Wal-mart.

It's the visits to the mental health center at the local hospital about which I'm worried. It's a sliding fee scale, however, I think that the minimum for anyone is $20.00 a visit.

I also feel, that if I go for counseling and subsequently get prescribed meds, that I'm just avoiding things and also spending time there when I could be getting other things accomplised.

I know how you feel, but if your mainly getting worked up and stressed about missing rehersals then the rescue remedy spray is really helpful :)

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 04:02 PM
Originally Posted by Clough
Isn't the sun one of the sources for vitamin D?


Yes, it is, but we don't get enough of it, especially in winter in Illinois. The RDA of D per day is 400 IUs. I researched this and have upped the amount I take to 4,000 IUs per day (2,000 twice a day). Have you tried glucosamine for your back and joints?

Tai chi is good for balance. Doing a few basic yoga positions twice a day might help (Google this.)

Yes, I know that I don't get enough sunshine. We've also not had a lot of around here lately!

What brand do you take for the vitamin D, Wondergirl?

I've never heard of glucosamine. Is it something that's over-the-counter? One thing that I've heard of helping for the joints is Certo.

I have a book on yoga at home. There's also a place called the Friendly House in Davenport. The classes for yoga are free there. I have a 79 year old friend who's been trying to get me to go.

I definitely need to do something about the back pain. I find it hard to even sit up straight. With the pain, things just multiply on themselves. I start freaking myself out and it just gets worse and worse. It's like having multiple panic attacks, if there is such a thing.

Thanks!

Wondergirl
Jan 31, 2010, 04:13 PM
What brand do you take for the vitamin D, Wondergirl?
Nature's Bounty. Puritan Pride is good too, or other major brand names.

I've never heard of glucosamine. Is it something that's over-the-counter?
Yes. Schiff is what I take, 1500 glucosamine and 1500 MSM. Are you still on dial-up? I will c/p info here, or you can Google.

There's also a place called the Friendly House in Davenport.
Going there regularly for yoga will help not only your back but also your social life. At first it will be tough to move your body, but stick with it. Don't give up.

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 04:19 PM
Originally Posted by Clough
What brand do you take for the vitamin D, Wondergirl?


Nature's Bounty. Puritan Pride is good too, or other major brand names.

Okay, I'll check them out!


I've never heard of glucosamine. Is it something that's over-the-counter?


Yes. Schiff is what I take, 1500 glucosamine and 1500 MSM. Are you still on dial-up? I will c/p info here, or you can Google.

I'm on high-speed where I'm house and dog-sitting. No problem with receiving things via the Internet.



There's also a place called the Friendly House in Davenport.


Nature's Bounty. Puritan Pride is good too, or other major brand names.

Yes. Schiff is what I take, 1500 glucosamine and 1500 MSM. Are you still on dial-up? I will c/p info here, or you can Google.

Going there regularly for yoga will help not only your back but also your social life. At first it will be tough to move your body, but stick with it. Don't give up.

I think that I'll definitely do the yoga thing!

Off to feed the dogs and go to Wind Ensemble rehearsal now!

Thanks!

thisisit
Jan 31, 2010, 06:01 PM
Hi Clough, I found the best way for me to deal with fear is to face it head on. I know myself and trust myself enough to know that, though I may make an honest mistake, I will do what I believe is right when I'm faced with any situation. Even the scary stuff, face it head on and let the chips fall where they may. Put one foot in front of the other and move through whatever it is that is scaring you.

Have you read Don't Panic: Taking Control of Anxiety Attacks by Reid Wilson? This is a very good book for people who suffer from fear and anxiety and panic. If you haven't read it, I think you should. I know it has helped many people take control of their anxiety and fear, even stop having panic attacks all together.

Here is a link to reader reviews of the book Don't Panic: Amazon.com: Customer Reviews: Don't Panic Revised Edition: Taking Control of Anxiety Attacks (http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Panic-Revised-Control-Anxiety/product-reviews/0060951605/ref=dp_db_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1)

Clough
Jan 31, 2010, 09:01 PM
No, I haven't read that book. But, I will check it out, thisisit!

Thanks!

QLP
Feb 1, 2010, 06:08 AM
When my hubby was going for his vasectomy he was more than a tad nervous so I gave him some rescue remedy to put in his pocket and take if he felt overwhelmed. It was so effective the nurses had to wake him up as he had fallen asleep in the waiting room.

justcurious55
Feb 1, 2010, 09:32 AM
What's rescue remedy?

redhed35
Feb 1, 2010, 09:35 AM
what's rescue remedy?

Its magic made by fairies!

Its an over the counter herbal remedy that promotes a natural calming effect.

I wonder if you might know it by a different name.

Wondergirl
Feb 1, 2010, 09:36 AM
what's rescue remedy?
Posted earlier in this thread --

Rescue&reg Remedy - Official Site (http://www.rescueremedy.com/)

Clough
Feb 1, 2010, 11:10 PM
Everyone here has been so very, very helpful and I really appreciate it!

It's great to not have to be alone! :)

Thanks!

Clough
Feb 1, 2010, 11:14 PM
Posted earlier in this thread --

Rescue&reg Remedy - Official Site (http://www.rescueremedy.com/)

Is that something that's only available online? Plus, is it totally safe?

Wondergirl
Feb 2, 2010, 12:12 AM
Is that something that's only available online? Plus, is it totally safe?
Well, years ago I bought a book on how to make Bach flower remedies to soothe my cats when they were having various difficulties with stress or sleep or aggression. I never got around to making them though because the cats calmed down with other interventions. The flower remedies are non-toxic and have no side effects. The ingredients are from flowers. One UK web site says this --

Bach flower remedies are natural products based on extraction and dilution of flower components. They can be used to help treat physical and psychological complaints but there is little scientific evidence to suggest how effective they are. The remedies should not be used in replacement of conventional medical interventions as these procedures and actions and all based on scientific evidence that has been proven.

Some concoctions (the essences, I believe) contain alcohol, so read the labels.

Clough
Feb 2, 2010, 12:15 AM
How did you make the remedies, Wondergirl?

Wondergirl
Feb 2, 2010, 12:20 AM
How did you make the remedies, Wondergirl?
I didn't. (I'd edited my post to say that.) I still have the book, and I'm sure you can get it on Amazon. Want a link? (And if I remember, you need a mortar and pestle to grind the petals for the various recipes. Often alcohol is the liquid that holds it all together, but I'm guessing there are other liquids too such as honey or even water.)

Wondergirl
Feb 2, 2010, 12:23 AM
Clough, look at this page, and click on Home to see all the pages --

The 7 Bach Flower Groups, By Dr. Edward Bach (http://www.bachflower.com/7_Groups.htm)

LyraArtemis
Feb 3, 2010, 11:27 AM
Read the Book of the Dun Cow!
It's message about feeling lonely is disturbing but also sheds some light on things..

Clough
Feb 3, 2010, 11:39 AM
Read the Book of the Dun Cow!
It's message about feeling lonely is disturbing but also sheds some light on things..

I will check it out, LyraArtemis!

Thank you!