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tucsonfaith
Dec 12, 2009, 03:18 AM
Hello,

I am a meth user who I think has hit my rock bottom. I hate meth always have.I've used to mask the pain of my life and use due to being a work aholic.I'm what you call a functioning addict I don't loose anything but gain more. Today is another atttempt to try to "clean"-up. The hardest part for me is my mom is also a addict who just moved in with me.shes been a addict my whole life I'm the mother to my mother. The one who has always acted older and had more and taken care of her in her life. I'm scared.I'm nervious and more.I withdraw so hard worse then I've seen others do. I get super sore,nauses,very dizzy and feel so depressed and that depression alone scares me due to I have taken the step of suicide in past while coming down and I too this day don't understand how I made it out and still alive. But I am and still using meth.I've been use'ng on and off for 4 years.I look normal and very attractive.people say and I'm not being conceded but just use'ng what I've been told as a example" victoria secret model."meth hasn't ran me down look wise nor my mother.I'm at least grateful for that.its in my head a curse as well.make thing and people around you think your stuck up or that you got the job due to the way you look so you work harder to prove your hired for your experience. Anyway I typed in de-toxing off meth to see if anything will help that I didn't know about. I'm going to try xanex if I can find it,and yes I'm aware of the addictiveness.thank you for these comments and your story brono it gives me hope that I too can do this I'm not alone.. and anybody have any ideas on how you quit when your trigger has always been your own mom and now who lives with me.option of having her move is not avail.I some times wish it but not something that can happen.

Signed:

Despret to feel normal and to find herself and smile again.

startover22
Dec 12, 2009, 10:34 AM
Hello,

I am a meth user who I think has hit my rock bottom. I hate meth always have.i've used to mask the pain of my life and use due to being a work aholic.i'm what you call a functioning addict I dont loose anything but gain more. Today is another atttempt to try to "clean"-up. The hardest part for me is my mom is also a addict who just moved in with me.shes been a addict my whole life im the mother to my mother. The one who has always acted older and had more and taken care of her in her life. I'm scared.I'm nervious and more.I withdraw so hard worse then ive seen others do. I get super sore,nauses,very dizzy and feel so depressed and that depression alone scares me due to I have taken the step of suicide in past while coming down and I too this day dont understand how I made it out and still alive. But I am and still useing meth.i've been use'ng on and off for 4 years.I look normal and very attractive.people say and i'm not being conceded but just use'ng what ive been told as a example" victoria secret model."meth hasnt ran me down look wise nor my mother.i'm at least greatful for that.its in my head a curse as well.make thing and people around you think your stuck up or that you got the job due to the way you look so you work harder to prove your hired for your experience. anyway I typed in de-toxing off meth to see if anything will help that I didnt know about. i'm going to try xanex if I can find it,and yes i'm aware of the addictiveness.thank you for these comments and your story brono it gives me hope that I too can do this i'm not alone..and anybody have any ideas on how you quit when your trigger has always been your own mom and now who lives with me.option of having her move is not avail.i some times wish it but not somthing that can happen.

Signed:

Despret to feel normal and to find herself and smile again.

All I can say is that you are in the right mind to want to stop the nonsense and get clean. YOu need supportive people around you... people to help you through. Do you have that in your life? Your mom is not that, she can't help you and help herself, you need a strong someone that you can trust to keep with you! Good luck.