View Full Version : I'm always depressed
ImmortalKiss
Jan 7, 2010, 09:34 PM
Well like the title so bluntly states. I'm always depressed. There will be times where I'll be happy about something or just be in a good natured mood, but it never last long. I try oh so very hard to be happy, I've been to therapy but I was one of those people who it was useless for. I do have escapes from it all like singing writing and drawing, those always help, but I can't always be doing one of those things. I had an absolutely horrible problem with self-mutilation and I'm still recovering... Im a teenager and I understand hormones being released in the brain and such, but no matter how hard I try to look positively I always find another reason to hate myself and people around me. I'm sensitive and overreact about every little thing. I'm looking for ways to maybe change how dependent I am on people because I'm always let down, lower my expectations, make myself happier without having to fake smiles, and just kind of stop crying... I take all advice, harsh and soft... so please give me every thing and any thing that you think might help me get through this.
rosemcs
Jan 7, 2010, 10:19 PM
Healthman has it right on with the nutrition.
I must also add that getting a good night's sleep and exercise does wonders for the body. The endorphines from exercise can really help your moods.
Try to get out in nature and take walks. The beauty is uplifting. You will be dealing with ups and downs your whole life and will have to learn how to cope. If you learn while you are young, you are fortunate.
Do you have people that have good health habits in your life? If not, would you be open to what the community offers as far as professionals that give classes in the area of health and personal training?
Also, I think that you will find that many people have their own suffering in their life that they have learned how to cope with. Are there groups of these people in your area? Look in newspapers, community magazines, and hospital bulletin boards. Remember, where there is a will there is a way.
ImmortalKiss
Jan 7, 2010, 10:30 PM
Im a very healthy individual actually, I heat healthy for the most part the occasional junk food and snacking is always good. Im in great shape and play a lot of sports... I used to have insomnia so I always thought sleeping was my problem, I was put on melatonin(sp) and it made me feel worse when waking up the morning after... Ill try sleeping more by your advice and seeing if I can get rid of the depressed feeling that always comes around in the pit of my stomach
rosemcs
Jan 7, 2010, 10:36 PM
Maybe you can look into Theanine. It is an antioxident found in green tea w/o the caffeine. It helps calm you and increases Seratonin levels. Studies have found is to be as powerful as an antidepressant, but w/o the side effects. It can help you sleep and can also help you not be depressed. It is found in the health food store.
I have also heard about St. John's Wort, but have not taken that.
(I must have a disclaimer that I am not a doctor and am sharing what works with me.)
ImmortalKiss
May 13, 2010, 08:36 PM
So for the past few weeks I've been having a pretty crippling, so to speak, nightmare. It will change slightly ever so often but besides the point, what I'm mainly concerned with is the fact that I hear things, sometimes voices, sometimes screams. I'll hear them sometimes multiple times a day and some days I can go without hearing them at all which is a blessing. I can hear them at school, walking alone, or even watching TV. At times it will drive me to cup my hands over my hears and hit them so it all blocks out. A while ago these dreams managed to get me to hurt myself almost on a daily basis. I've been told that I should see a doctor, but I would fully enjoy some more help on what I should do on the whole subject. Thank you.
J_9
May 13, 2010, 08:46 PM
These happen during the day while you are awake?
How old are you? Has there been any extraordinary events in your life recently? Any new changes? Any trauma?
ImmortalKiss
May 13, 2010, 09:03 PM
Yes, all throughout the day. Im 15 years old, no trauma or events that would be life altering in any way.
J_9
May 13, 2010, 09:05 PM
How are you grades in school? Are you under a lot of pressure?
ImmortalKiss
May 14, 2010, 03:45 AM
My grades are average A's B's C's, I'm not usually one to stress over school work, the stress does exist though.
DrBill100
May 14, 2010, 11:33 AM
So for the past few weeks I've been having a pretty crippling, so to speak, nightmare. It will change slightly ever so often but besides the point, what I'm mainly concerned with is the fact that i hear things, sometimes voices, sometimes screams. I'll hear them sometimes multiple times a day and some days I can go without hearing them at all which is a blessing. I can hear them at school, walking alone, or even watching TV. At times it will drive me to cup my hands over my hears and hit them so it all blocks out. a while ago these dreams managed to get me to hurt myself almost on a daily basis. I've been told that i should see a doctor, but i would fully enjoy some more help on what i should do on the whole subject. Thank you.
Your concerns are well founded and I'm sure you're experiencing enormous personal distress and worry over these occurrences. I took the liberty of reviewing your earlier posts in relation to depression and self injury and also see that you have received some type of counseling (talk) therapy for those conditions, albeit ineffective in your appraisal (which is the only judgment that matters). Suffice to say, at the present time you are still searching for answers and relief.
You're right in doing so. It is my belief that regardless of the affliction an individual benefits from obtaining as much reliable information as possible in relation to the condition and treatment options. That allows you to have a basic understanding of your condition, develop a level of acceptance of it, and determine at least a basic idea as to where to turn for needed assistance.
At your present state you are aware that something needs to be done but don't know what. Right now, I don't either. So any recommendation based on your brief narratives would serve no purpose.
I do know that in dealing with matters of the mind it is very important for you to have confidence in any treatment process for it to have a chance of success. It may be that you need to see a doctor. But it must be your decision in order to be effective. You must have confidence not only in doctors, but know that you are seeing the proper specialty (type of doctor), feel comfortable with the doctor you choose and therefore his/her recommendations.
To that end I, or anyone here, should be happy to assist. It must be emphasized however, that this is not an independent attempt to diagnose or provide treatment. Rather, it is an effort to put you in a position to make an informed decision about those matters. Therefore more attuned to an educational process... self-enlightenment.
You seem sufficiently concerned, curious and intelligent to benefit. This would probably require about 2-3 hours (not continuous, but total) of your time and mine. If you're willing to make the investment then let me know and off we go.
talaniman
May 16, 2010, 09:10 AM
I think you can start by asking your parents to let you schedule a doctor visit with the family doctor, and he can recommend tests, and referrals to the proper doctors and treatments. Talk to your parents ASAP!
ImmortalKiss
May 16, 2010, 11:04 AM
Thank you so very much for your input, and what you've suggested sounds good to me, any input going towards the appropriate intervention that I might benefit most from is very helpful, and almost confidence boosting.
DrBill100
May 16, 2010, 12:12 PM
First I'd like to have you reconsider one item. You referred to having been to therapy and added that you are "one of those people who it was useless for." Please consider that it may have been the type of therapy or, even more likely, the therapist. The primary element in talk therapy is the relationship between patient and therapist. It is neither you nor the therapist... just an undefined incompatibility in some cases. Could that be?
This isn't to convince you to accept talk therapy only to see if that might still be an available option. There are many types of therapies from the psychodynamic to CBT, brief and extended. If you visit a doctor they may make that decision for you unless you express a preference.
Are you currently taking any medication for your problems?
If not, were you ever prescribed medication?
At your age, it's going to be necessary for you to discuss this with your parents, as talaniman notes above. My interest isn't in circumventing that step but getting you in a position where you are personally informed about your condition, can provide input to the decisions made, and don't feel that treatment is being imposed on you. You have obviously done some research on your own. You seem acquainted with psychiatric jargon. I would like to get you to the most helpful resources as soon as possible so as to expedite your decision. In other words assist you in your own exploration that you've already begun.
I notice in this post you don't mention the voices as you do in your later post. Did the "auditory hallucinations" begin more recently and have you discussed this development with anyone?
talaniman
May 16, 2010, 01:56 PM
Please Note that her threads were merged for a better picture.
DrBill100
May 16, 2010, 01:59 PM
Please Note that her threads were merged for a better picture.
Thank you for the advice and assistance.
ImmortalKiss
May 16, 2010, 08:42 PM
Getting right to the questions asked, no I'm not on medication and I was once prescribed melatonin to help sleep, in case that was the source of my "depression" the auditory haluncinations bit however is recent and I was sent to the hospital by concerned school administrators and mentioned it during my short stay. They did state however; the psychiatrists working in the hospital that is; that one evaluation isn't enough to diagnose a problem or help find the most successful form of help on my way to recovery.
DrBill100
May 17, 2010, 09:30 AM
Getting right to the questions asked, no i'm not on medication and I was once prescribed melatonin to help sleep, in case that was the source of my "depression" the auditory haluncinations bit however is recent and I was sent to the hospital by concerned school administrators and mentioned it during my short stay. They did state however; the psychiatrists working in the hospital that is; that one evaluation isn't enough to diagnose a problem or help find the most succesful form of help on my way to recovery.
Let me confirm that you live in the US?
How long were you hospitalized? Any tests that were performed. Do you know if there were neurologic tests of any type? (could have involved balance, coordination, brain wave or scan)
Has there been any follow-up from this incident on the part of your school, parents, hospital or doctor(s)?
There were no treatment recommendations discussed with you during the hospitalization?
How did your school become aware of the auditory hallucinations? (was it because they observed something or because you approached someone)
Does your school have any type of in-house medical (school or visiting nurse) and/or school counselor. (I know school counselor probably isn't prepared to deal directly with your problem... still like to know)
I assume that, if for no other reason, as a result of this hospitalization, that your school and parents are aware of your problems?
The message conveyed is that you are walking all around and through availability to treatment but haven't taken advantage of it. That is not a criticism or a blaming statement, doesn't imply that you should have. I'm sure you had valid reasons for your choices and I would like to know what they were so you don't wind up walking in a circle.
You seem remarkably intelligent, capable of expressing yourself and making decisions. Paired with your expressed level of concern about your condition, on the one hand, and your choice to bypass several opportunities for therapeutic intervention in the past does bear on weighing future options. I'm interested in your thoughts on that matter.
You also failed to mention your earlier treatment for depression and what led to that treatment episode and why you felt it was unproductive.
ADDED: Melatonin is an available supplement OTC in US for a naturally occurring hormone and is commonly used for sleeplessness (highlighted sections will link you to further information. Please read through the side effects (http://www.herbal-supplements-guide.com/melatonin-side-effects.html)). As you will observe it is regualrly associated with vivid dreams and even nightmares and is not recommended for persons under the age of 20 (http://www.melatoninfaq.com/).
ImmortalKiss
May 17, 2010, 08:28 PM
Yes, I do indeed live in the US. I was only hospitalized for a day and the test that they preformed was just an evaluation so to speak. My mom has been contacting therapists and such, of which I have a few meetings with within the next few weeks. The only treatment suggestions they made was that I see a therapist or psychiatrist. The school became aware of my hallucinations because I had a few during class and then when called down to administration to explain I admitted that I had been hearing voices of sorts. Our school doesn't supply any "out-of-school" visits because they strictly run, with school. I hope that answers some questions that you had. Once again, I must sincerely thank you for your input.