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lmickle
Jan 2, 2010, 01:08 PM
I have a 16 month old son with my ex. We were in a 2 1/2 year on and off relationship. We have been broken up once again for about a month. I do have a child support order against him and he doesn't pay child support at all right now. He is soon to be 1700 behind, which is about 4 months of non payment. He keeps telling me that he has "50/50" support with me, which I don't feel is correct. I feel like I have sole custody of my child. He was having visitation every other weekend up until recently when my son almost landed in the hospital because of him. I want to know what his rights really are since there is NO visitation order ordered by the court, and what is my best route to make sure that I can keep my child away from him except for supervised visitation?

cdad
Jan 2, 2010, 02:10 PM
From the title on this post there isn't anything related to it in the post. But I will start there anyway. If your going to leave then you need to go to court first. If not he can drag you back or you can give up the child. That's your choice. As far as a ruling for support are you sure there is no custody stated in the court papers. Either legal or physical. If your going to want supervised visits then your going to have to have very strong reasons for needing it and just saying I don't trust him won't work. Why was your child in the hospital because of him ?

Fr_Chuck
Jan 2, 2010, 02:27 PM
Yes, if you leave without his and/or the courts permission, he can merely file for custody and the court will order him that you bring the child back to the state.

Normaly their would or should be a custody order when you get a child support order, since the payments are bsed normally on what percent each have the child.

Child was in the hospital, why, and how, accidents do happen to the best parents

So unless he is a real threat to the child there is no reason he will or can not get joint custody of the child in a court hearing.

If he is on the birth certicate he has as much right to the child as you do, until you get a custody order in place

lmickle
Jan 2, 2010, 03:14 PM
yes, if you leave without his and/or the courts permission, he can merely file for custody and the court will order him that you bring the child back to the state.

Normaly their would or should be a custody order when you get a child support order, since the payments are bsed normally on what percent each have the child.

child was in the hospital, why, and how, accidents do happen to the best parents

so unless he is a real threat to the child there is no reason he will or can not get joint custody of the child in a court hearing.

If he is on the birth certicate he has as much right to the child as you do, untill you get a custody order in palce

In the Child support Order it lists me as the custodial parent and what not. My son is with me 100% of the time. His father smokes, does drugs, and drinks around my son all the time, plus has a history of being physcially violent with me. My son almost had to be admitted to the hospital because he was on the brink of pneomonia. The doctor said that it was from his father smoking around him.

lmickle
Jan 2, 2010, 03:17 PM
From the title on this post there isnt anything related to it in the post. But I will start there anyway. If your going to leave then you need to go to court first. If not he can drag you back or you can give up the child. Thats your choice. As far as a ruling for support are you sure there is no custody stated in the court papers. Either legal or physical. If your going to want supervised visits then your going to have to have very strong reasons for needing it and just saying I dont trust him wont work. Why was your child in the hospital because of him ?



All there is a child support order stating I'm the custodial parent. There is no visitiation order or anything like that. SO that is why I don't think he has 50/50 rights with me. And he was almost in the hospital because his father smokes around him and it flares up his asthma and this time it was almost pneomonia.

Fr_Chuck
Jan 2, 2010, 03:27 PM
OK, there is no child custody order, and you need one.

He is not a drug user to the court unless you can prove he is, you just saying he is will not be evidence, has he been arrested, does he have rehab history, is there a history of failed drug tests.

As for as just smoking, unless the child has a specific breathing issue ( not one time illness) smoking is not illegal and will not normlly even be considered as a issue for custody.

Also drinking, it is legal, the judge may drink, so it is getting drunk, not drinking that has to be an issue.
Has he been arrested for DUI, is there some proof in court to his drinking being a problem.

The custody issue is still up in the air, since there is no court order on custody.

cdad
Jan 2, 2010, 04:34 PM
Custodial parent can renge from 100% to 51%. All it really means is that you're the parent with the majority of time with the child. Another issue is that you don't know where the child had been and you really don't know what all his other allergies may be. Doctors tend to lay guilt trips on parents and they go for the throat by saying smoking is causing it. It may have but the doctor doesn't really know for sure. Did you tell the doctor your ex smokes or did he guess at it ?

ScottGem
Jan 2, 2010, 04:53 PM
First, there are two types of custody; physical and legal. By assigning you as the custodial parent with nothing else, then you are considered to have primary physical custody. But he probably has joint LEGAL custody.

lmickle
Jan 2, 2010, 08:56 PM
ok, there is no child custody order, and you need one.

He is not a drug user to the court unless you can prove he is, you just saying he is will not be evidence, has he been arrested, does he have rehab history, is there a history of failed drug tests.

As for as just smoking, unless the child has a specific breathing issue ( not one time illness) smoking is not illegal and will not normlly even be considered as a issue for custody.

Also drinking, it is legal, the judge may drink, so it is getting drunk, not drinking that has to be an issue.
has he been arrested for DUI, is there some proof in court to his drinking being a problem.

The custody issue is still up in the air, since there is no court order on custody.

My ex has had one failed drug test and lost his job due to it because he got injured at work, had the drug test, and failed it. And he has also had an MIP of alcohol AND was actually kicked out of the Navy right before we met due to his drinking and not being able to be on post at the right time.

When I get the child custody order, if it comes to that, is that when I ask for him to have supervised visits? I feel that his current girlfriend and him do NOT take care of him when they are watching him, which is why I stopped letting him take my child over the weekends also.

lmickle
Jan 2, 2010, 08:57 PM
Custodial parent can renge from 100% to 51%. All it really means is that your the parent with the majority of time with the child. Another issue is that you dont know where the child had been and you really dont know what all his other allergies may be. Doctors tend to lay guilt trips on parents and they go for the throat by saying smoking is causing it. It may have but the doctor doesnt really know for sure. Did you tell the doctor your ex smokes or did he guess at it ?

The doctor asked if anyone smokes around my son and I told him that I don't because I live in a non smoking apartment, but that his father does.

lmickle
Jan 2, 2010, 08:59 PM
First, there are two types of custody; physical and legal. By assigning you as the custodial parent with nothing else, then you are considered to have primary physical custody. But he probably has joint LEGAL custody.

What does the joint legal custody mean in regards to rights over our child? And what do I need to do to get full PHYSICAL and LEGAL custody of my child? I just want him to have supervised visits and that's it.

ScottGem
Jan 3, 2010, 05:55 AM
Joint Legal Custody means he has equal say in raising the child.

You really need to consult an attorney to properly prepare a case for getting full custody.