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KristyH22
Dec 25, 2009, 05:11 AM
I am writing to request some advice as to what I can do about my son's father trying to get 50/50 to my son, he has seen a solicitor and has demanded a few things for example: He wants to take my son for 1 week and then I have him for the other week. I do not want this.

My son in 10 1/2 weeks old and is breastfed. Can he do this?

His only concern is that I won't allow my son to travel in a car driven by him because of the reckless way he drives and his blatant disregard for the road rules for example: drink driving, speeding and tail gating and not wearing a seat belt which he has been charged for. Can he get a court order to order me to allow my son to go in his vehicle?

I have been reasonable and have offered to allow him to visit my son 3 days a week for 2 hours, after he told me all he wanted was 2 days a week for 1/2 an hour. I have been told that I am to make the decisions because I am my sons primary carer and if he doesn't approve then too bad. Is this right for now, before we have to go to medaition or court?

Can I apply for full custody of my son to prevent any of these things?

He also has a drinking problem and anger management issues, I do have a real fear for my child if he be taken from me that something terrible will happen to him.

I need all the advice I can get, please help me!

Fr_Chuck
Dec 25, 2009, 01:04 PM
Unless he has proven bad driving, long list of tickets, long list of wrecks, I doubt you can stop him from taking the child in his car.

And I am laughing, no 2 hours 3 day sa week is not reasonable, it is his son also and he should have full equal rights to the child.

You can apply for full cusotody but if eh fights it, doubt you will get it, unless you can prove he is seriously a threat,

mantismommit
Dec 26, 2009, 09:46 PM
Kristy, I went through the same thing - sued for full custody by a abusive stalker when my child was thirteen days old. Get a lawyer. Now. Do whatever you have to to pay him or her - this is too important. But yes, he will sadly get visitation - the current system is daddy-happy - so if one shows up with a pulse, no matter how deficient and miserable a human being he is, the courts will bend over backwards to accommodate him and make allowances for all sorts of awful behavior by him. NOT YOU THOUGH. They don't care at all about the importance of mothers currently. Fight tooth and nail for what's best for you son and nurse him as long and hard as possible! By the way, the judge in my baby's case (male!) did sharply limit visitation during the first year specifically to accommodate breastfeeding. So not all care more about "father's rights" than child welfare. Good luck, and congrats on your lucky (to have you) boy!

ScottGem
Dec 26, 2009, 10:29 PM
Mantis, obviously you have had a bad experience and I sympathize with that. But this is the law forum and answers here need to conform to the law. So some of your tirade has been removed or edited.

Chucks advice was based more on the future, not the present. Visitation will be limited while the child is an infant. But, unless, Kristy can prove the father is a danger to the child, he will, in all likelihood get a lot more visitation then she wants to give.

Father's DO have rights and the present swing towards recognizing those rights is generally a good thing. We have seen many cases of junkie mother's being given custody because they are the mother, when a stable loving father is there to be a good caregiver. It works both ways.