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View Full Version : Unmarried Father: Do I have a chance of getting cusody of my children?


SNAXX70
Dec 24, 2009, 12:36 PM
I was asked to move out of the home my ex and I have resided in for the past 9 years. We have 2 children together, 7 and 2 years old. In June of 08' I had to take a leave from work to provide care for my children, for what was supposed to be 2 weeks. It was a joint decision. 2 weeks turned into a month out of necessity, and after much discussion, we decided that I would not go back to work. I would stay home and take care of the kids while going to school, and she would continue to work. By late August I had not found a school situation I felt was suitable for our needs.

My ex decided to enroll herself in a 1.5 year course that had 2 four hour weekday classes and 2 nine hour weekend classes, on top of working 5 nine to eleven hour shifts a week. In July of 09' things started to sour and the time she spent at home with the kids drastically decreased to about 5 to 15 waking hours spent with our kids per week.

Since June of 08' I have been the primary caretaker of my children.Thier mother has been the primary financial provider. I have made a move from Los Angeles, to Apple Valley and I want my kids with me. I do not intend to prevent my ex from seeing the kids as much as she would like, and she says the same for me.

So far, there has not been any legal action on either side. I would like to know if, based on the fact that I have been primarily responsible for my kids child care for the past year and a half, I have a chance at getting joint custody with the kids being placed with me. What kind of custody should I be going after? Could I remove my daughter from her school and enroll her in school near my new residence, without legal consequences?(I am not trying to see my car's description on an amber alert sign!). I truly appreciate any advice.

ScottGem
Dec 24, 2009, 01:29 PM
Even if you weren't the primary caregiver, you would have a very good chance of getting joint legal custody. The key is getting primary physical custody. And that's what you should be going for.

Since there is no current legal action, I would think you could move with your children and let the mother fight it in court. However, if you have moved without the kids. Taking them now might cause some problems. However, you wouldn't be prosecuted for parental kidnapping unloess you try to hide the kids from the mother or take them in violation of a court order.

Fr_Chuck
Dec 24, 2009, 07:36 PM
One question to answer to the court is why you moved out without taking the kids with you.

But courts are giving fathers joint custody and even custody more and more all the time.

Being married has nothing to do with it

SNAXX70
Jan 2, 2010, 08:25 PM
My initial move out of the house included my children. The move coincided with my daughters Winter break from school. I say initial move because a good portion of my things are still in the home.

We have already agreed that my son will live with me, at least until February, when his mom will complete her schooling.

My plan is to let my daughter go back to school, and my ex's home, on Monday the 4th. I will use this upcoming week to contact a family attorney to see if I'm within my rights to remove my daughter from her school and enroll her in a school near my new residence, without her mothers consent. My problem with allowing my daughter to remain in school in L.A. is that a good portion of her care will now fall on my ex's live-in cousin, instead of my ex.

With me, my children will have full time care provided by me. My parents are willing to assist me financially and with child care if needed.

I am in dire need of legal advice. I have very limited financial means, as I am unemployed. Does anyone know where I would be able to find legal assistance in the, possibly for free? I am in the Los Angeles / San Bernadino areas of California. Any info would be greatly appreciated.