View Full Version : Can a 17 year date an 14 year old
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 12:02 AM
I just turned 17 and the girl I'm talikng to is 14 and is going to turn 15 in 9 days is this all right
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 12:04 AM
Sure. You can talk, you can even go out. If you have sex then you're in trouble, because she's not legal. You'd be charged with statutory rape.
Dating is fine, there's not law against that.
ChildOfGod_1
Dec 15, 2009, 12:05 AM
You are too young! Work on your life children. You ought to have a bright future. This is the age where you can dare to dream big things and also dare to work towards them! - use it.
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 12:08 AM
You are too young! Work on your life children. You ought to have a bright future. This is the age where you can dare to dream big things and also dare to work towards them! - use it.
How does this answer the OP's question?
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 12:09 AM
I just turned 17 a month ago and she is going to be 15 on christmas eve
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 12:18 AM
i just turned 17 a month ago and she is gonna be 15 on christmas eve
What State are you in?
Like I said, you can date, you can talk, you just can't have sex, unless you want to be charged with statutory rape. Unless you live in a State where 15 is the legal age for consent. Most states are 16, some are even higher then that.
So date, just don't have sex.
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 12:24 AM
I live in Arizona she's from canada
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 12:27 AM
i live in arizona shes from canada
Well that will make dating a bit harder. ;)
I don't think you have to worry about the sex issue, seeing as you live so far apart.
Have you actually met her? Are you sure she's as old as she says she is?
Just FYI, the age of sexual consent in Canada is 16.
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 12:32 AM
No we haven't met we tallked on a site called habbo I was also think that to I don't know what to do I mean I would like a girl my age or 16 but girls are so shallow nowadays that they have to have that gangster guy or that dude who tries to be something there not I guess dating is really making my rope thinner but I don't want to break her heart what should I do
amicon
Dec 15, 2009, 12:36 AM
I would find someone in my own area to date.
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 12:39 AM
I know I should that's what I'm trying to do maybe I need some help or advice
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 12:44 AM
no we haven't met we tallked on a site called habbo i was also think that to i don't know what to do i mean i would like a girl my age or 16 but girls are so shallow nowadays that they have to have that gangster guy or that dude who tries to be something there not i guess dating is really making my rope thinner but i don't want to break her heart what should i do
You don't have to break her heart. Just be honest with her. Tell her that she's a great friend and that you enjoy talking to her, but, obviously the two of can't be boyfriend and girlfriend, and it's not just because of the age difference, but the fact that it's unlikely that you will ever meet.
Talking to people on line is great. I've made many great friends on this site, but, when it starts to interfere with your real life, you real friends, then it's a problem.
Not all girls are shallow. Just like not all boys are gangsters or fakes. You're only 17, go out, have fun, meet people. You will meet someone eventually. Trust me.
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 12:50 AM
Thanks altenweg you're the first person that said this to me
My mom taught me to be a gentleman I had to teach myself to be a man cause my dad wasn't here for me a lot of girls say they don't a gentleman
Thank you know how to give advice thanks
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 12:57 AM
thanks altenweg you're the first person that said this to me
my mom taught me to be a gentleman i had to teach myself to be a man cause my dad wasn't here for me a lot of girls say they don't a gentleman
thank you know how to give advice thanks
At 17 most girls think they want the bad boy, the guy that they see in the movies. Rugged, handsome, harsh. That's not reality, but they don't know it.
17 year old girls don't have the sense God gave a goat. Trust me, I was a 17 year old girl once. I remember. ;)
The fact is, when a girl gets a bit older, realizes that bad boys are... well... BAD BOYS, that's when she looks for a keeper, a gentleman, a nice guy with a good heart, kind, caring, smart, funny.
I went through a lot of bad boys before I found my gentleman. Of course I did what any smart girl would do, I married him. We met when we were both 19. We've been together ever since. I won't tell you how long because a lady never admits her age. Let's just say that it's been a while. ;)
Being a man is not always easy. A real man doesn't change who he is to please someone else. A real man treats everyone with respect. Because of that, a real man is often waiting in the wings for people to realize that he is a real man.
Don't change who you are just to get a girl. If the girl is worth having, she'll like you for who you are. It's corny, but it's true. It really is. :)
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 09:41 AM
At 17 most girls think they want the bad boy, the guy that they see in the movies. Rugged, handsome, harsh. That's not reality, but they don't know it.
17 year old girls don't have the sense God gave a goat. Trust me, I was a 17 year old girl once. I remember. ;)
The fact is, when a girl gets a bit older, realizes that bad boys are...well...BAD BOYS, that's when she looks for a keeper, a gentleman, a nice guy with a good heart, kind, caring, smart, funny.
I went through a lot of bad boys before I found my gentleman. Of course I did what any smart girl would do, I married him. We met when we were both 19. We've been together ever since. I won't tell you how long because a lady never admits her age. Let's just say that it's been a while. ;)
Being a man is not always easy. A real man doesn't change who he is to please someone else. A real man treats everyone with respect. Because of that, a real man is often waiting in the wings for people to realize that he is a real man.
Don't change who you are just to get a girl. If the girl is worth having, she'll like you for who you are. It's corny, but it's true. It really is. :)
Thank you you're good advice giver
Starring_Emma
Dec 15, 2009, 02:15 PM
Sure. You can talk, you can even go out. If you have sex then you're in trouble, because she's not legal. You'd be charged with statutory rape.
Dating is fine, there's not law against that.
He wouldn't be charged with statutory rape unless he was 18+
Alty
Dec 15, 2009, 02:30 PM
He wouldn't be charged with statutory rape unless he was 18+
The OP lives in Arizona.
In the State of Arizona, a person under 18 years old CANNOT consent to engage in sexual conduct (A.R.S. § 13-1401).
Under Arizona law, sexual conduct is when a person intentionally or knowingly engages in sexual intercourse or oral sexual contact with a person under 18 years of age. Sexual conduct with a minor 15, 16 or 17 years old is class 6 felony. Sexual conduct with a minor under fifteen years of age is a class 2 felony.
If you are a juvenile, and the victim is under 15 years, the county attorney has the discretion to bring adult charges against you (see Juvenile Justice). If the victim is 15 years or older, the county attorney has the option of asking a judge to allow him to bring adult charges against you. If a parent, stepparent, adoptive parent, legal guardian or foster parent engages in sexual conduct with a minor the person will be charged with a class 2 felony and could carry a prison term of 3 to 27 years maximum sentence (A.R.S. § 13-604.01).
Read the bold print.
ScottGem
Dec 15, 2009, 02:41 PM
First, a little over 2 years at your ages is at the edge but not bad. However, you have no idea whether this girl is real or telling the truth or what. You are also not going to be really dating over the distance between you.
So I would just keep talking to her but keep it on a friends basis. Tell her the distance between you is too much to do anthing more than that.
ScottGem
Dec 15, 2009, 02:48 PM
You are too young! Work on your life children. You ought to have a bright future. This is the age where you can dare to dream big things and also dare to work towards them! - use it.
Are you living in the real world? Kids are starting to date at 11 these days (though I don't agree with it). But dating at 14 or 15 is not out of line. While a 2 year gap at their ages is at the edge, its not bad.
FadedMaster
Dec 15, 2009, 05:32 PM
Hey, I wish you luck. It can be difficult growing up. I found myself feeling the same way as you at times. I was that "Mr. Nice Guy" that all the girls were "just friends" with. Trust me, it'll pan out. And it never hurts to have plenty of friends. Girls make great friends because you can always ask them advice on other girls. Obviously you don't want to burden a girl who likes you with your problems about another girl haha.
Talk to girls, get to know them. Like mentioned above, go out and have a great time. I know when I was in high school (and I can't imagine it's changed too much in the past 4 years) it was a big thing to be in a relationship. Many people would jump straight into being exclusive without ever going on a single date.
You can do it. But I would try to date people around your area because if you get emotionally involved with someone so far away, with so little to do about it, it will hurt eventually. But then again, some might say that pain can validate your existence as a human being.
sunking
Dec 15, 2009, 10:34 PM
Thanks everybody for your support
You guys have helped me and I'm going to do the right thing
Just tell her we can be friends
I just want a girlfriend someone who gets me who shares what I like just someone like me so I don't feel so alone
I know some of think I'm over exaggerating this cause I've got family love but I want emotional love
But girls today just want fakes where is there a girl for me in today's society it really damages myself esteem
Maybe I just need advice on this
I know I'm young only once so I should do everything I can
But I just want love I just need help getting started
You guys are the best thanks for responding to my dilemma
FadedMaster
Dec 21, 2009, 06:27 PM
thanks everybody for your support
you guys have helped me and im gonna do the right thing
just tell her we can be friends
i just want a girlfriend someone who gets me who shares what i like just someone like me so i don't feel so alone
i know some of think im over exaggerating this cause ive got family love but i want emotional love
but girls today just want fakes where is there a girl for me in todays society it really damages my self esteem
maybe i just need advice on this
i know im young only once so i should do everything i can
but i just want love i just need help getting started
you guys are the best thanks for responding to my dilemma
Hm. Family love is an emotional kind of love, but I know what you are getting at. Just be sure that if you believe you are "in love", that it's not this "want [of] love" you have. Sometimes if one desires something strongly enough they will fabricate it.
It can be difficult to find love in ways that do not entail sexual relationships or "boyfriend/girlfriend" relationships. You can be close to someone, feel deeply for someone, support one another, without ever calling one another "boyfriend/girlfriend." That's what a friend is. :)
Glad to hear we can be of help.
sunking
Dec 22, 2009, 12:38 AM
Yeah I broke it off with that girl she cried (or she could've been not)
But I feel better getting that off my chest
Thanks guys