I have a self-employed husband who works very hard and long hours; but goes into work late (9 or 10am) and rarely gets home before 9pm. So, for 18 years I have been the disciplinarian and made 3 teenage boys' do homework, etc.
Fast forward to present time. Now 2 of the boys' are still at home (1 away at college) and the middle one is very resentful to me and cusses me out at the drop of a hat. When he acts like this, even in front of his father, my husband says or does nothing. He talks to him later about it. He does not stand up to him for talking to me like this at when it happens. Now our 20 yr marriage is in trouble and I have left. My son is still driving his car and doing what he wants. I want my husband to confront him when he is saying those awful things and back me up. I still love him, but I am angry at him for not getting home earlier (been an issue for years), and now not backing me up. Help!

It's unfortunate that your husband won't back you up in dealing with your disrespectful son. By not doing so, he is not teaching him very well. He may get away with it at home but in the "real world" such behavior can have serious consequences. I guess the real question is are you willing to let your marriage break up over it? I would hope that your answer would be no. If worse comes to worse maybe your son is the one who should go instead of you. You may need to be the one to take the bull by the horns and deal with the situation, harshly if necessary, if your husband will not. While I agree that he should, the bottom line is, if he doesn't then you're the one who has to step up to the plate (once again) and address the situation.

Thanks for your input. I have been the one to deal with all situations and want him to step up to the plate for once. I just needed to get away. We have counseling set up and I will go back home then. Until then they have to cook, do laundry, etc Will do them all good. I do not want a divorce, but feel he needs a little shaking up...