Mistique
Nov 23, 2009, 10:20 AM
Last Tuesday my brother calls my husband and tells him he is having some issues with his ex (which he is staying with until his renovations on his house are done), his ex is going out and not really participating and he has had enough (which I don't blame him for) and if he could stay at our house for a couple of weeks until he finds a place to rent. So I called him back and said okay for 2 weeks to a month but out before Christmas and I want my own space.
My house has two adults and two young children, a smaller living space and is very well kept, clean and I have nice things in it. So they started staying here starting on Thursday. It was okay since his son goes to school during the week... but then the weekend came! Horrible! Now I have a 10 month old, a 3 year old and a 9 year old. This is way too much for me... I have no idea how single moms do it with 4 kids... really!
The thing is this, the 9 year old does not listen to me, talks back to me and has a smart mouth. At his dad's house the boy cleaned and everything but at my house; opposite. He knows how to clean up after himself. I had to re-educate him about potty training and he was not impressed (neither am I if it is on the floor, toilet and wall - you know boys :)). My husband works a lot so I have NO expectations of him. Now that I have two more people in the household I just say, respect each other and clean up after yourself as my house is not a barn and you are not a guest; you are staying here very short term and in this time there is a few things I expect so we can all get along and I am not overextended. I still clean up after everyone... regardless of what I initially said and I am wearing down thin... plus cooking double.
I don't want to be a free babysitter;
I don't want to take on a role of being a mom (I have two really, really, really small kids of my own);
I don't want to overexert myself;
I don't want my house to be a mess;
I don't want to be talked back at;
I don't mind making supper but then everyone knows where the dishwasher is right?
My brother is very clean and stands beside my decisions and how I run things (he appreciates the cleanliness and big dinners)... his son isn't behaving at my place but did at his own place. Okay if I know it will be a definitive time (2 weeks - I can survive) but my brother isn't clear.
Should I just stay reserved until two weeks pass and see how I feel? Or tell him out by a specific date? I just want to make it work for two weeks (I don't think I can last a month)... after that I want to enjoy the rest of my leave before I go back to work... which is soon and I was hoping for a peaceful Christmas.
What do I do? Or am I over-reacting? I know how to deal with children just not big ones that aren't mine... help!
My house has two adults and two young children, a smaller living space and is very well kept, clean and I have nice things in it. So they started staying here starting on Thursday. It was okay since his son goes to school during the week... but then the weekend came! Horrible! Now I have a 10 month old, a 3 year old and a 9 year old. This is way too much for me... I have no idea how single moms do it with 4 kids... really!
The thing is this, the 9 year old does not listen to me, talks back to me and has a smart mouth. At his dad's house the boy cleaned and everything but at my house; opposite. He knows how to clean up after himself. I had to re-educate him about potty training and he was not impressed (neither am I if it is on the floor, toilet and wall - you know boys :)). My husband works a lot so I have NO expectations of him. Now that I have two more people in the household I just say, respect each other and clean up after yourself as my house is not a barn and you are not a guest; you are staying here very short term and in this time there is a few things I expect so we can all get along and I am not overextended. I still clean up after everyone... regardless of what I initially said and I am wearing down thin... plus cooking double.
I don't want to be a free babysitter;
I don't want to take on a role of being a mom (I have two really, really, really small kids of my own);
I don't want to overexert myself;
I don't want my house to be a mess;
I don't want to be talked back at;
I don't mind making supper but then everyone knows where the dishwasher is right?
My brother is very clean and stands beside my decisions and how I run things (he appreciates the cleanliness and big dinners)... his son isn't behaving at my place but did at his own place. Okay if I know it will be a definitive time (2 weeks - I can survive) but my brother isn't clear.
Should I just stay reserved until two weeks pass and see how I feel? Or tell him out by a specific date? I just want to make it work for two weeks (I don't think I can last a month)... after that I want to enjoy the rest of my leave before I go back to work... which is soon and I was hoping for a peaceful Christmas.
What do I do? Or am I over-reacting? I know how to deal with children just not big ones that aren't mine... help!