View Full Version : Severe Childhood sexual abuse
cherry1965
Nov 9, 2006, 09:58 AM
In Canada, how does one go about reporting severe childhood sexual abuse that took place 40 years ago... I'm not sure charges can be laid, or even if this man can be found or is even alive, I've tried looking, reaching out to classmates from high school who knew the family, but the wall seems to have come donw. How do I go about firstly, finding this man and then if I can, pressing charges. It has caused me serious SERIOUS pain in my life and I am only now ready to confront it.
Cherry1965
bhayne
Nov 9, 2006, 10:06 AM
A victum can lay a charge any time whether the culprit is dead or alive. Just file a police report.
Why would you think the victum would have to locate the perpetrator? The police have many more resources than you. You probably have to file a report, an investigator is assigned the case and may want a tape recorded deposition. That's how my case was solved. Once I gave the tape recorded deposition, I just sat back and was periodically informed of the investigation's progress.
The beauty of it was that I did nothing and the perpetrator is left sweating over there consequences.
LIFE IS GOOD!
cherry1965
Nov 9, 2006, 10:11 AM
In Canada, how does one go about reporting severe childhood sexual abuse that took place 40 years ago.......I'm not sure charges can be laid, or even if this man can be found or is even alive, I've tried looking, reaching out to classmates from high school who knew the family, but the wall seems to have come donw. How do I go about firstly, finding this man and then if I can, pressing charges. It has caused me serious SERIOUS pain in my life and I am only now ready to confront it.
Cherry1965
Thank you so much for your quick reply, I have been in tears since yesterday... despite going for specialized therapy for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that was just diagnosed NOW... anyhow, by police report, I imagine you mean the "local" police and not the RCMP. Is that so?
Cherry 1965
bhayne
Nov 9, 2006, 10:24 AM
If you believe him to be in the same city perhaps the local police. Otherwise the RCMP.
Actually, I would cover all bases and use both. On touchy situations such as yours, I can assure you that no one will take the case lightly. You should be provided with support systems and contacts of people in similar situations that know the best route to follow.
BigCookie
Apr 19, 2007, 09:44 AM
In Canada, how does one go about reporting severe childhood sexual abuse that took place 40 years ago.......I'm not sure charges can be laid, or even if this man can be found or is even alive, I've tried looking, reaching out to classmates from high school who knew the family, but the wall seems to have come donw. How do I go about firstly, finding this man and then if I can, pressing charges. It has caused me serious SERIOUS pain in my life and I am only now ready to confront it.
Cherry1965
I have just accomplished something similar - after 30 years, my "father" has just been arrested.
First, you must contact the police in the town where the crime happened
Write a brief request to have the case investigated
Request an investigator's contact name if you don't get one within a reasonable time
Give them all of the evidence that you have gathered
The investigator will ask you for whatever else you need to provide
Be prepared to identify the culprit by his actions, appearance and anything else you know about him
Be prepared to give out all leads, contact information and be on hand to assist the investigator
Be patient - it takes months to get the ball rolling.
It won't take the investigator long to let you know if the Crown will take the case, but do not worry; they will take you very seriously no matter what.
BE PREPARED
I have just sorrowfully discovered that mentioning my abuse has seriously impacted professional therapy. I was warned, but didn't know what to listen for. As soon as my psychiatrist found out I was an abuse victim, he said he could no longer help me (took me 3 years to tell him). The peer-to-peer support group here (volunteers naturally) has been tremendous and tell me that this is expected. The province only allows for 4-5 sessions for abuse victims. Jeepers!
HUGELY IMPORTANT
Make some phone calls and find a peer support group in your area. The internet is great, but a human voice is better.
Confronting this to the mat has made me feel positive emotions that I didn't even know that I had, like joy. Simple for some, seemingly unreachable for people like us, but it CAN happen, happiness.
I wanted to address this for decades. It is never too late to resove it.
I hope you find a peer group and I send you a happiness vibe.
:)
JuneSmith
Jan 2, 2011, 09:01 AM
Unfortunately, in my experience this has not been the experience that I was imagining. I was imagining police that actually took child sexual abuse seriously and that the people who hurt me would go to prison and have their rights taken away like they took my experience of a safe and happy childhood away. I told maybe 15 people (social workers, psychiatrists, psychologists, nurses) when I was 12-15 and NO ONE LISTENED. I live in red neck Canada. In fact no one helped me to file a police report back then. 14 years later after non related serious injuries than left me in in rehabilitation for 6 years to relearn to walk, talk, read and write I finally went to the police to report what happened to me. They have not taken it seriously. Next week when the court house opens I will file my own affidavits called "a private information" in the court house and have them notarized by the commissioner of oaths that works at the court house. These people are complete wing nuts in terms of their pro neo con - anti homosexual rhetoric that fills their inane press releases, but this is how to file an affidavit with the court if your experience of talking to the police provides to be really quite useless (as mine was). http://www.canadacourtwatch.com/For%20Kids/Sample%20letters/SampleAffidavitForChild%283%29.pdf
It says for kid, but the type face and how you write it is the important part.
There is a fee waiver system where it doesn't cost the $75 it usually costs to file "a private information". It also costs money to pay witnesses. My friend who is helping with this (my parents are helping too as they were told about the abuse when I was 12 and then sent me to child and family social services where people told me I was crazy and put me on drugs after I would repeatedly say that I was there to get counseling for childhood sexual abuse and could they help) asked yesterday how much it was to ensure a judge came to the proceedings... but the fee schedule doesn't say.