Hello everyone I hope you can help me ( I REALLY NEED IT)

Me and my girl friend had been going out for 2 years now happily so I thought. She started to act a little strange and none clingy a month before our 2 year anniversery. I thought I could just play hard to get and she would come back to me, she did but for a short period. She had been texting this guy from school quite a bit and I was getting worried I thought he might try and steal her but I confronted her about it and she assured me that everything was fine (they just friends). She had been avoiding me and hanging out more with her friends as I usually let her but not hanging out with me and when I asked her to hug me she finally told me she wanted a break. I asked her what for because it was so confusing to me she said she just needs to clear her head didn't really tell me why but she said she wanted to be single again for a little and hang out with her friends more. This was very strange to me because I always let her do what she likes I never restricted her I smothered her with love whenever I could. I cried and tried giving her space not talking to her as what she wanted she felt so guilty for my heartbreak she came back to me I hugged her and kissed her and told her how much I loved her it seemed like all was back to normal, it felt like this for a week. She then became a little more hesitant towards me again she told me that she hadn't felt the same way about me for at least a month now and our differences were pushing us apart (we have things in common but not a lot but it doesn't effect me). She said she loves me but not all romantically like before it is more like a family love (close friend). She then told me she wants a break but for real this time to clear her head otherwise she will keep feeling like this. I just wanted to try and show her how much I loved her so I did but nothing worked she just cry's and feels guilty for breaking my heart. I tried to give talking to her a rest but it just made me feel sick till I couldn't eat I had to have contact with her it made me feel good. Every time I would try and have a normal "friendly conversation" with her I would pour my heart out to her it was just the way I felt. I love her so much I never want to lose her she is everything to me. The other guy she was texting told her he liked her and she has feelings for him too but they have desided to just stay friends (this guy has a reputation for having a new girl friend each week he doesn't get any action though he usually gets heart broken I don't know if you can call it love after 2 days) but yeah that gave me some assurance and hope that I still have a chance. I read her notes and all the things she ever gave me they make me feel so warm inside I know I could never love another girl like her. I have come to the conclusion that I have to give her space and time (I have read around on this website and seems like the best thing to do) I just hope it isn't too late for me god I love her so much... I seriously would do anything for her I would die for her if it were the case but I know her feelings are not the same for me anymore

If you have any tips or advice please let me know because I am finding life not really worth living without her

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/girlfriend-doesnt-love-me-anymore-254142.html

I also forgot to mention that she says she doesn't want t be in a relation ship at the moment because year 12 is starting (her last year of high school) I just want to be there for her but she says she will have her friends and I don't want to be just friends what we had was so special and I need that again. We are going to be seeing each other at school at snack and lunch time but I just don't really know what to do I don't want to be in the "just friends" category and have a friendly chat because whenever I think about her I remember all the good times we had and pour my heart out to her. Or sort of avoid her and make it look like I'm havn fun without her so she misses me please help me I really do need her she is my everything ( yes I know how corny that sounds) but it is true and if it weren't I wouldn't be reaching out to the world for advice

Sorry but she doesn't want a relationship and you re going to have to accept that. Being friends is not a good idea. Yes it hurts like anything but you can't force someone's feelings. You can however look after yourself and heal from this.
At the top of the relationship page in this forum there are stickies-good advice so read them.

Hi Lipkel,
You haven’t mentioned important information about your age, and whether you were both serious enough to consider marriage before your girl decided to have her own space.

Anyway, I believe that your girl is about 17 years old (as you have mentioned that she is starting her Year 12) Lipkel, I must tell you that your girl is way too young to have a stable mind of her own. A mature girl with real love would not even consider another man, or suddenly say out of the blue that she needs space. A mature love doesn’t/ WILL NOT take up space, instead it gives you comfort and support. You seem to be acting mature by giving her the space she needs, but she seems to be acting immature by looking out for more spice (I believe she is a little bored).

The web sites that you have read are correct. You just need to stay away from her for a while, and let her come back to you. If she doesn’t, then take it as an opportunity to know her real nature and thank God for giving you a chance to know about her. In the mean time, Please Do Not torture yourself with her thoughts. I very well understand what you mean by saying that you need to talk to her for you to feel good. But, remember there are lot more other worthwhile things that will make you feel even better

Pick up the phone and talk to your old best friends.
Help someone in need
Attend to your parents and make them happy. They need your presence and not your girl who needs time away from you.

Keep doing this, and you will eventually realize that the tears you had shed for your girl were a lot valuable, to not let it spill anymore.

Also I do not know about you, but I pray when I am deeply hurt by someone, and amazingly God seems to give me the strength to not get frustrated and angry with the person.

All the best. Concentrate on giving joy, and you will find joy automatically…Cheers

I tried to give talking to her a rest but it just made me feel sick till I couldn't eat I had to have contact with her it made me feel good. Every time I would try and have a normal "friendly conversation" with her I would pour my heart out to her it was just the way I felt. I love her so much I never want to lose her she is everything to me


Sorry guy, you really need to accept her feelings have changed, and leave her alone to break your addiction to her.

Its unhealthy to put so much dependence on another, when its your responsibility to make yourself happy. She can't do it for you.

I am 17 we always used to say we loved each other sooo much forever and ever I knew she meant it then we planned on getting married I had it all figured out the day I would pop the question (it wouldn't b until like 20) we used to talk about the house we would have and children I just know it is still there I know it it just doesn't disappear she is just stressed because we just came out of exams and now we are going straight into year 12... I sure hope space is the answer I know I sound very selfish but I prayed to god and asked him if he gave her back to me I will devote my life to him he made me feel warm inside like she once did when I was with her he has taken my heart break away I feel like I know we will get back together some day I just hope its soon I miss her heaps and just being friends would ruin me I know it

Unless you get a life without her, your going to learn your lesson the hard way.

Id rather live a life of heart break for her then not have her at all

But does anyone have any tips for when I'm at school should I avoid her or what? Just smile and not say anything? That is going to be the hardest part to keeping distance I need some guidance

Thanks everyone for their input so far I appreciate it very much

Lipkel, right now you are in a state of shock and in denial, She is done with you- she has a new boyfriend. She is not coming back to you... stick a fork in the relationship because its done.

Leave her alone and go complete NO CONTACT! Do not answer any texts, emails and don't look at her Facebook or twitter. Sorry to be harsh but its for your own good.

You need to start healing. When you see her in school look the other way or say hi back to her but don't initiate any contact. Hope this helps!

Does anyone think I should have her over for a sort of celebration? To celebrate what we once had give her roses, a little something I made for her and watch an old dvd we used to love to watch like a going away gift

Did you just read my last post? NO NO NO NO!! Do not contact her- leave her alone! She will think you're creepy or weird if you try to do this!

So after two years, you walk away.
Leaving me stranded day by day.
I put my trust in you and you fall for him.
Neverminding me, leaving me on a limb.

How could I ever think what we had was real
When you have no idea how I feel
I can't eat nor sleep, I'm dying within.
Seems like loving you was my only sin.

I'd give it all away just to have it all come back.
I can only dream of us, but reality it will lack.
I guess it's time to say goodbye.
So I open my heart and let love fly.

I won't waste another second on you.
Its obvious your love was never real nor true.
So when I see you in the halls, all you see is a ghost.
Cuz you won't ever see the person who loved you the most!

But does anyone have any tips for when I'm at school should I avoid her or what? Just smile and not say anything? That is going to be the hardest part to keeping distance I need some guidance



Your right dude, its going to be hard. Cutting contact with someone is the one of the hardest things you will ever do in your life. We know, we have all had to do it at one time or another.

When you see her you speak, as you would with any other human being, but you will be busy and unavailable for and conversation, so keep it brief in school and strictly No Contact at all out of school. No
Calls
Emails
Texts
Cards
Nothing, as this is the way you get through the shock, pain, and emotional upheaval of your break up.

Fair warning though, because she may think your cool with being a friend, and may not understand you ignoring her. She can understand because she was thinking of dumping you a long time ago, so she isn't in the shock and pain you are.

She has a head start on moving on and you have to work hard to get where she is so keep your distance and leave her alone, and you will get there.

Read the stickies for this forum and see how others have healed and moved on. There is a link in mt signature. Any other questions you have, just ask. We know exactly how you feel, so you are not alone.

Good luck, you'll need it!