View Full Version : I am 15 and had sex for the first time but didn't enjoy it.why ?
lil_red_girl
Oct 26, 2009, 07:51 PM
I am 15 years old and had sex for the first time with my boyfriend of one year last weekend. What I can't stop thinking about is that I didn't enjoy it at all. I could have fallen asleep :p, I was on top and I just wasn't feeling a thing!. It just didn't feel good at all. Sooo... what happened?. oh and also, I didn't feel the pain that everyone talks about.. it didn't hurt at all!.
Alty
Oct 26, 2009, 08:06 PM
You're 15, that's probably the main reason you didn't enjoy it.
Sex takes a maturity level that you can't possibly have because of your age. Sex also takes a lot of communication and a bond that you really can only achieve when you're older.
As for not feeling any pain, it's very possible that he didn't actually penetrate you, which would also explain why you didn't feel anything.
There's a reason why grownups tell kids to wait, this is one of them.
I hope you at least used protection. Trust me, if you get pregnant, you'll definitely feel pain when you give birth.
leon_1991
Oct 27, 2009, 11:00 AM
Exactly as Altenweg Said...
Your post seems almost immature,
I hope the fella in question doesn't read this post!
It would be humiliation on a max scale!
Your 15! What do you expect? The roughest greatest experience ever?
The guy probably has little experience and you have none.
It takes time to know what's right/wrong and how to make it the best possible!
And seeing as you have been together one year:
Talk to each other, let him know what you like and also listen to what he likes, don't be afraid to open up to him and give him pointers, that's how you learn!
My GF had never been with anyone, not even a hug, and yet now, well.. wow!
So yeah, just talk together and experiment and try and find what you both LOVE!
GOOD LUCK!
Alty
Oct 27, 2009, 11:04 AM
Leon, although I do agree that talking to each other, communicating your likes and dislikes is a great idea, I have to say, at 15 my only advice would be to wait.
The OP doesn't seem to even know the basics about sex, which is not surprising at 15. My concern is pregnancy, STD's, and other things that a 15 year old simply isn't prepared to handle.
Wait a few years. Really, the older you are the better sex is.
leon_1991
Oct 27, 2009, 11:15 AM
I Understand your point totally
But for me to come here and say:
Don't do this, don't do that...
Would make me a hypocrite
Yes she clearly doesn't know enough yet to be jumping in at the deepend..
But we all have to start somewhere..
I do agree, wait until your older, but that seems inaffective here.. she's already started at 15.. so all we can do is basically point her in the right direction
But ill be honest.. her post seems very childish.
She wasn't ready.. and she SHOULD have waited. But that's too late..
I just hope she realises the dangers and thinks harder before making big choices in the future
redhed35
Oct 27, 2009, 11:29 AM
I Understand your point totaly
but for me to come here and say:
dont do this, dont do that...
would make me a hypocrite
yes she clearly dosnt know enough yet to be jumping in at the deepend..
but we all have to start somewhere..
i do agree, wait untill your older, but that seems inaffective here.. shes already started at 15.. so all we can do is basically point her in the right direction
but ill be honest.. her post seems very childish.
she wasnt ready.. and she SHOULD have waited. but thats too late..
i just hope she realises the dangers and thinks harder before making big choices in the future
How about because its illegal?
Just saying.
Alty
Oct 27, 2009, 11:30 AM
It is too late to turn back the clock, but she still has a future.
I was a teen once too, trust me, I make the OP look like a little angel. That's why I give the advice that I do, because I know from first hand experience that sex at a young age isn't a good idea.
I remember being 15, thinking I was so mature, thinking I was in love, thinking that nothing bad could ever happen to me, that was other people. I know now how immature, naïve and stupid I was at that age. I didn't know squat, but would I listen?
So, if I can get through to one teen, then I've done my job. I can't change the world, but I can tell the truth and hope it sinks in.
leon_1991
Oct 27, 2009, 11:33 AM
Not always!
So before we go blowing up on laws...
Where in this post does it sayher fella is 16+
OR
If she is from USA.. does it say he is 18+?
Because if he isn't then its not illegal
Yes if he IS then its illegal
But... for someone to have sex with a boyfriend of one year and then press charges?
There is a trend at the moment with teens doing exactly that,
Usually because mummy and daddy find out
And rather than admit they did wrong
They all too quickly point the fingers!
I'm sorry for ranting but I have been there first hand and faced a VERY long jail time.
Until the person admitted making the whole thing up
Alty
Oct 27, 2009, 11:40 AM
Leon, if they're both underage it doesn't make it any more legal.
As for the trend, Leon, if my 15 year old daughter was having sex with an 18 year old, you better believe I won't stand by and keep quiet about it.
I would talk to the boy first, tell him to back off, give him the option of leaving my daughter alone or going to jail. After that it's his choice.
The laws are in place to protect teens. There's a reason why there's a legal age for sexual consent, because at that age most teens don't have the sense God gave a goat. No offense to goats. ;)
I'm going to assume that you are a teen. Nothing wrong with that, but, until you're an adult you won't understand why we feel the way we do. It's just part of growing up, gaining some wisdom.
Now that we've officially hijacked the thread, let's get back to the question at hand.
leon_1991
Oct 27, 2009, 11:43 AM
Ok.. lets get back to the question..
My final point is this:
It takes TWO to tango...
And yes I'm a teen ( 18 ) but also a father to a little girl myself..
Anyway.. we shall leave it there and let other members answer the OP question
slapshot_oi
Oct 27, 2009, 11:54 AM
Do you do everything perfect the first time? I didn't think so. Of course it's going to suck the first time, it always does.
how about because its illegal?
'Cause if he's under 16 too, it ain't.
redhed35
Oct 27, 2009, 02:39 PM
I am 15 years old and had sex for the first time with my boyfriend of one year last weekend. What I can't stop thinking about is that I didn't enjoy it at all. I could have fallen asleep :p ,, I was on top and I just wasn't feeling a thing !.. It just didn't feel good at all. sooo ... what happened ? ... oh and also, I didn't feel the pain that everyone talks about.. it didn't hurt at all !..
Perhaps you had built the whole thing up into a romantic scene...
We are all hit by media images of love and romance but the reality is, the first time mostly lets us down.
Having sex is a big deal and changes everything,there are also so many reasons you may not have enjoyed it.
Fear of pregnancy.
Your body not ready for sex.
Where you were.
The thing is,when your older relationships are different.
Just one more thing, when you have sex,you are putting yourself at risk of pregnancy,there is no contraceptive that is 100% effective, if your having sex,good or bad,you can still get pregnant.