Hello to all,

First, I really cannot express how thankful I am to be able to ask for some help in finding my biological father and possibly siblings too!

I have limited information as my Mother's husband would not allow for me to speak of my biological father that left my Mother while she was pregnant with me. I didn't know I was adopted for many years until it "slipped", and always felt hollow. My Sister and I are full siblings with our biological father, but she refuses to speak of him (she knew him for eight years, or so) out of respect of our "Father" that raised us. He raised her well and his son (half brother to me) too, but I got the abuse.

My Mother was married to the man that I was told went by the name of Peter Chickering. I was born in December of 1974 in Boston. Peter left when my Mother was pregnant. In the story as I am supposed to believe, he did remarry and had at least one other child, possibly two or three children. I was told he was an Engineer. I was told that he passed away several years ago. I cannot find a "Peter Chickering" or anyone else looking for him or me. I know there was a message left on the phone for someone (Peter's ex-wife after my Mom) looking for his children, but my Father went into a tirade and erased the message and all my hopes of finding out anything were literally erased with a smile on my "father's" face. I never felt like I belonged to him, and quite honestly knew I didn't belong to him in another sense of gut feeling... I've always felt like part of me was missing. I really want to find the family that I belong to. Even if he is deceased, I long for meaningful sibling relationships that I do not have with my siblings now.

In closing, I do not expect anyone to welcome me with open arms or be overjoyed, but I do hope that I can see who I might look like and should my biological family members are found, I can only hope that they would like to start communication slowly. I pray for this.

Many thanks to all of you
Bostonfisherman

There is a sticky at the top of this thread about finding biological parents/children.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adoption/looking-birthparents-children-given-adoption-401680.html

Please refer to instructions given there for a starting place.

What does your mother say when you ask her for information?

There is a sticky at the top of this thread about finding biological parents/children.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adoption/looking-birthparents-children-given-adoption-401680.html

Please refer to instructions given there for a starting place.

What does your mother say when you ask her for information?

Thank you for your reply

My Mother will not provide me with any information AT ALL! She completely avoids it, acts like it never happened and takes offense and leaves me feeling guilty. She is a Catholic and is humilitated over the situation she faced (single mom with my sister, pregnant and having to go through a divorce).

I did read the guidelines, thank you.

I feel that my situation may be unique where my birth father had passed away. I know the wife calling the house and leaving a message was calling regarding her child, but I have no idea if that child(ren) know about me. My biological sister has nothing to do with my search, she will not speak to me since I decided to search for other siblings. My little brother (half-brother to my Mom and her Husband that raised me) has NO IDEA that my Sister and I were adopted by his father and are not his full blooded siblings.

I do not fit the new law in Massachusetts for obtaining the original birth certificate because of the "cut-off" date. I miss it by 5 months. There was no adoption agency involved. It was just my mom and my dad going to court and then he was my father.

Well, you can't force the family that you grew up with to like this. You also can't force them to give you information.

You have no basis for legally opening closed records for the adoption, really, and since your biological father is decease, you're going to be doing a search for next-of-kin of his.

If this is truly affecting you the way you say, I suggest that you invest money into a private investigator, and invest time with a counselor for yourself to learn how to deal with your emotions relating to your adoption in a manner that does not involve anyone else doing anything.

I would just like to point out that pursuing this has the possibility of permanently alienating you from your mother and sister, thus causing you to lose what family you have--and since your biological father is deceased, you may end up with absolutely NOTHING in return.

I do not know if you will get this or respond. My father passed away 5yrs ago his name was Peter Haven Chickering. I do not know if this is your dad but your story struck close to home as Peter left my mom when I was 9yrs old and started a new life in Boston. If you want to talk more you can email me at EMAIL REMOVED

All responses should be done on the boards. I have removed your email address.

My fathers name on my birth certificate is Peter Chickering. I know he passed several years ago.. He walk out on mom and my brothers and sisters. I know he's from Massachusetts... If it's the same man.. You will have other siblings...