Im 17 and I live in Indiana my boyfriend is 25 can he be arrested for dating me and is it legal for us to have sex I'm so confused please help me!

I believe the age of sexual consent in Indiana is 16, so I think you are safe.

Not to pry, but do your parents know you are dating a 25 year old? More than any legal ramifications, I would be worried about parental issues.

I asked the question of course you can ask others if you can help :) No my mom doesn't know but I do plan to tell her when I turn eighteen...

Are you sexually active with him right now? Please let me know if I get too in depth, I just would like a clear picture of what we are talking about. Also, how did you happen to meet a 25 year old?

This thread is probably better off in the legal forum, seeing as we're dealing with a minor dating an adult.

I don't know the laws but Sariss did say that the legal age where the OP is is 16. The question is, is there an age gap that is not acceptable?

Many states will okay 16 years old for sexual contact, but the person they're having contact with has to be a certain age, or a certain amount of years older. That would be something worth checking into, seeing as there is an 8 year gap here.

To the OP. I was a teen once too, so I understand, even though I'm an adult now. When I was 16 I dated a man in his 30's. That was a huge mistake. As a child I didn't consider the reasons a man that age would be interested in me. Let me assure you that it wasn't because I was mature, it was the lack of maturity he liked.

If you really care about this guy then wait until you're older. If he really cares about you then that won't be a problem for him.

Also, tell your parents. Ask yourself why you haven't, I'm sure it's because you know they won't approve. Try and remember that your parents were teens once too. That's why we say the things we do, give the advice we do, because we've been there.

Take care and good luck.

I am sexually active with him and I met him because he was my oldest brothers best friend but we go so well together and he has helped me through a really tough break up and he isn't thirty that's just creepy and I haven't told my mom because I don't want my family to get mad at him my mom has tried to get me to admit it but I can't let them know even though she tells me that she would be okay with it I just think she's trying to get me to admit it

I am sexually active with him and i met him becuz he was my oldest brothers best friend but we go so well together and he has helped me through a really tough break up and he isnt thirty thats just creepy and i havent told my mom because i dont want my family to get mad at him my mom has tried to get me to admit it but i can't let them know even though she tells me that she would be okay with it i just think shes trying to get me to admit it

So just admit it! She already knows and its hurting her that you're not being honest.

If the relationship has to be a secret, then you shouldn't be in it.
A 17 year old teenage girl has no business dating a 25 year old man. It is not okay. The age gap is the same as a light year apart.

A 25 year old man, secretely seeing a 17 year old teenage girl, is a HUGE issue in my opinion.

If you were my daughter, the brakes would be put on this one without question.

Sorry, but he IS a rapist.

Indiana Code 35-42-4 (http://www.state.in.us/legislative/ic/code/title35/ar42/ch4.html)

Section IC 35-42-4-9
(e)(1) The person is not more than four (4) years older than the victim.
(e)(3)The crime:
(A) was not committed by a person who is at least twenty-one (21) years of age;

Since he is more than 4 years older and over 21, this qualifies as statutory rape.

While it was not illegal for him to date you, it IS illegal for him to have sex with you.

Let me add that ANY 25 yr old who engages in sexual activity with a 17 yr old deserves to be charged with statutory rape.

This is a guy who is presumably out of college and starting a career. You are still a minor just finishing high school. I have to question what you have in common besides sex.

And NO ONE should be engaging in sexual intercourse unless they are prepared to have a child.

2 to 3 years of difference isn't that much, but 8 years could be pushing it- it's not that it can't be done- it's that you still have some maturing to do. I know that because you tell us that you haven't told your parents. You need to drop this guy and put a hold on dating until you are ready to get married, and have a SERIOUS relationship.

Thanks for catching that, Scott. I should have looked deeper..

If the relationship has to be a secret, then you shouldn't be in it.
A 17 year old teenage girl has no business dating a 25 year old man. It is not okay. The age gap is the same as a lightyear apart.

A 25 year old man, secretely seeing a 17 year old teenage girl, is a HUGE issue in my opinion.

If you were my daughter, the brakes would be put on this one without question.

< I only have one thing to say if the age gap is like a light year so that would mean a 21 year old dating a 29 year old is like a light year. I may be seventeen but that doesn't mean I am the normal 17 yr old for one I've dealt with things that most adults can't even imagine
. So before you judge him and call him a RAPIST which isn't quite all true he may be four years older but I'm still old enough to consent so no RAPING has ever happened. I can't stand the fact that everyone ridicules him about me but I'm the victim I guess. If I didn't want to be with him I wouldn't I could have at least three other guys but none of them treat me as good as he does and I don't get the butterflys I get with him with anyone else he's the only one that can bring out the smile from my heart. He has bettered me in every way. I love him and don't tell me I don't know what it is, love isn't supposed to be Arguing about everything and calling each other every night that's not love! I have found a deeper love than most people ever even dream about. When I see his face my stress melts away and his kiss can stop the biggest downpour of tears. Thank you for your help advice and Judgement.

No one can stop you from dating him. Everyone is just laying out the law and their opinions. It's your choice whether you want to follow the law or follow their opinions.

There is a reason why laws are made. It's to protect a certain age group. Even if you think that you've experienced a lot at 17, it doesn't make you older. Don't confused your age with experience. Experience doesn't make you older, it just makes you more experienced.

As for your sexual relationship, there's no reason to rush that part. You should be spending time strengthening your relationship. Try reading this sticky: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/parenting/having-children-before-you-ready-399072.html

he may be four years older

That from your last post.


Im 17 and I live in Indiana my boyfriend is 25

That from your recent post.

So, which is it?

Im 17 and i live in indiana my boyfriend is 25 can he be arrested for dating me and is it legal for us to have sex im so confused please help me!!
Aside from all the legal garbage, the real problem is this guy is a loser. A 25-year-old should be working full-time, saving up to buy a house among other things, getting his life organized and not wasting his time dating someone who's not even close to being on the same page as him; dating a teenager is really weird. You can't drink for another three years, and can you even get into a rated-R movie?


I may be seventeen but that doesn't mean i am the normal 17 yr old for one ive dealt with things that most adults can;t even imagine
Right, 'cause you know how poorly everyone on this planet deals with their issues. You're obviously dating this kid to prove a point (to yourself).

I may be seventeen but that doesn't mean i am the normal 17 yr old for one ive dealt with things that most adults can;t even imagine
. So before you judge him and call him a RAPIST which isnt quite all true he may be four years older but im still old enough to consent so no RAPING has ever happened.

Oh Jeez, the 'I'm not a normal teen" gambit. Do you have any idea how many times we have heard that? Except very few teens, even at 17, have the experience to really judge how mature they are. And thinking that you know a deeper love than most people can dream of when you are only 17 just shows how little you can trust your emotions. But even if we take you at your word and you are special and the two of you are truly in love, that doesn't change the fact that he IS a rapist. Its not a judgement or an opinion, its a fact of law. The law states that if someone is under 18 it is ILLEGAL and considered statutory rape, to have sex with someone over 21 and more than 4 years older.

According tou he helped you through some "tough break". There is a string likelihood that what you think is love is just gratitude. But even if its not, this guy took advantage of you. If he was the saint you portray him as, then he would have backed off at having sex with you until you were 18. I will repeat that any 25 yr old have sex with a 17 yr old has serious issues.

Yeah, I thought the same thing when I was your age. That I was so mature for 17. I'm 20 now. And even though that's only a few years later, I can look back now and I have to laugh. I had a lot of growing up to do. Heck, I still have a lot of growing up to do. And it's STATUTORY rape. And that is illegal. Regardless of whether you agreed to it or not. You asked if it was legal. It's not. It's illegal and morally wrong.

Thanks I wish that sticky was more helpful on the situation than everyone else did! Im going to try those things instead of sex


No one can stop you from dating him. Everyone is just laying out the law and their opinions. It's your choice whether you want to follow the law or follow their opinions.

There is a reason why laws are made. It's to protect a certain age group. Even if you think that you've experienced a lot at 17, it doesn't make you older. Don't confused your age with experience. Experience doesn't make you older, it just makes you more experienced.

As for your sexual relationship, there's no reason to rush that part. You should be spending time strengthening your relationship. Try reading this sticky: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/parenting/having-children-before-you-ready-399072.html

Best advice and sticky I could ask for