Hi
Thanks for reading my post. I am 40 years old and have been divorced for 2 years now, during which time I have dated a few men who have either not been right for me or have thought they were and ended up hurt. It scared me, I hated the feeling and took a break from dating for a few months to develop myself and my career. A few weeks ago, I met a guy, he is 45, divorced and seems really really nice. We have been out on dates, he treats me wonderfully, is kind, respectful, considerate, even has bought me roses, in fact I have never been treated this well by a guy ever in my life.
Here is my dilemma... I really want to get intimate with him (we haven't yet) but I am so so scared of getting hurt yet again even though he appears different from other guys I have dated. I don't trust easily and take everything he does and says with a pinch of salt. Should I explain to him how I am feeling? I don't want to scare him off with deep emotional conversations though. Any advice is much appreciated. Thanks.

If you're so scared, then slow things down with him. Just keep getting to know each other and enjoy the time that you spend together. There's no reason to rush anything as you've only known him for a few weeks.

Well you just started seeing this guy. I would leave the emotional stuff out until you and he have surpassed a certain time to be able to be comfortable with discussing emotional issues. Or at least until a friendship, emotional connection and all the good stuff has been developed. Give your relationship time before you become sexually intimate. If you give him sexual intimacy within the first couple of months then there isn't much to keep him around. You can be affectionate in other ways, like massages, cuddling watching a movie, caressing his hair and gentle kissing. If I was single again, I know I would wait until the time is right and the feelings of emotional connectedness was one... I know I wouldn't start discussing ex's or anything personal immediately... this can be evolved over time... you want to be fun, interesting and full of life. Not bothered, sad, upset and an open book... keep him guessing and have fun doing some stuff to keep things interesting and most importantly... to keep that smile on your face.