Hey everyone, I just wanted to get someone opinions about this situation I am in. Back in November of '08, I went out to a club and met this guy. We talked a little bit, ended up having an amazing, chemistry laden makeout session, but we didn't have sex or anything. Turns out he lives in NJ :( (I live in FL) and he was on vacation. We exchanged phone numbers. Eventually we started talking on the phone, and our conversations are great. They last for hours (sometimes up to 5-6 hours! ) at a time. Despite the fact that we don't hang out because of the distance, we tell each other everything and I consider him one of my best friends. We have been talking about meeting up again, because I think we are both developing feelings for one another. I am really nervous about this. I feel like I would be devastated if in person we don't click. But at the same time, I feel like, how could we not click with all the talking we do? & We were attracted to each other when we met. Has anyone ever been in a situation like this? Is it possible that I could be in love with this person? Or am I just fooling myself... it's so frustrating!

Regardless of your feelings, how realistic is it that you two would ever develop a relationship? So you two meet up again, but do you honestly think you can continue being in a "loving" relationship by only seeing each other once a year? Just me, I would focus on my attention on a more realistic scenario. I also find it hard to be in love with someone whom I have only made out with... you may have a crush and you may be smitten, but that ain't love.

A chemistry laden makeout session: please explain to me what that is.

Sounds like he has a certain level of interest, otherwise he wouldn't talk to you so much.

Therefore, I suggest that you continue to keep in touch. Just keep talking about getting to know each other. Only when you see each other in person, then you decide whether to take the next step and enter into a relationship.

You want to know how you interact face-to-face and not just your phone interactions.

I think that chances are better than average that you will not be disappointed when you actually meet again in person.

Why I say that is, you are surely and effectively building a relationship based on words, sharing of information, and getting a really good feel for what this man is all about. If you and he are spending countless hours on the phone, and are able to engage each other enough that you aren't bored, or that you've heard enough, you really have something special here.

Suffice it to say that many relationships start in the sack, and the foundation is based purely on sexual gratification, and they don't last. If everybody did what you did before racing into sex, there would be a lot more substantive relationships to build upon.

Go for it!

Long-Distance Relationships seldom work out if ever... just take note of that.

And the feelings you are experiencing is just a big infactuation, but could turn in to romantic love... if a relationship was pursued.

But because of the distance... I don't think you guys have a chance... Honestly...

Thank you everyone for your responses. I do realize the odds are against me, considering this is a long distance relationship. But, I figure it will be best to at least give it a try, because who knows... it could turn out to be a beautiful thing, and I don't want to go through the rest of my life wondering "what if.."

I had the same thing happen to me!! It was in 1997. I met a clean cut man at a New Year's party. We spoke on the phone for 4+ hours at a time. I was attracted to him; he was smart, funny and had a good job. Months went by and we decided to meet again in person. After speaking with him in person, away from a loud group, he really annoyed me. He often interrupted me as I was speaking. If I spoke a phrase that was also in a song, he immediately would burst into singing that song. I was so glad they we met again in person so I knew to move on from that phone relationship. It was easy to get along on the phone; we were not reacting to real life situations.

Keep in touch with your phone love interest, but don't let it get in way of meeting and dating new guys. Save up your money and plan a visit in person, too. Best wishes.

Long distance relationships are difficult. I think a lot will depend on what you want out of this relationship and how patient you are willing to be. I was involved in an 18 month long distance relationship. I was in college at the time and loved the program I was in, and he had a great job in the city where he had lived his whole life - 1800 miles away. It worked nicely for 18 months. We talked on the phone for an average 2 hours a day (and many times had all night conversations of 6 hours or more), and often e-mailed. We could talk about anything and laughed a lot. He was very romantic and treated me very well. We only saw each other about every 2-3 months, but we had a great time when we did. He told me he loved me before we met and I couldn't understand how he could know, but he still says he loves me - and I believe it. To this day, he is one of my closest friends. If I had it to do again, I would probably make it less serious than it was, but I would do it again and I am glad I had the experience. I learned so much during the 18 months, and still continue to learn from him.

If you can agree to date others, it would help until you know each other better and figure out what you want from this relationship. You also want to make sure you are moving forward in your life, whether that is in school or work.

Thanks guys... yeah I wonder that too; how things will be in person. I'm almost worried that it will turn out to be awkward in person or we won't connect the same way, but I hope for the best. Right now I'm finishing up my last year in college, so after that, I'm free to go wherever I want if this works out for us. And I haven't stopped talking to other guys either, I definitely haven't shut any doors.

Can you imagine at the turn of the century, without the communication tools we have now? No internet with video, no phones, no digital cameras, no form of communication except by the written word, and sent by pony express, taking weeks, if not months to reach its destination.

And even when potential mates met, they were supervised, and words were awkward, few, and a lot of pauses between.

What you have compared to that, is a lot of information. A great deal really considering the conversations, video cams to see each other, instant pictures, and mere seconds away from that person, even though you are so far apart.

You have a very good impression of each other, and an intimacy that you may not ever have had, in that you have learned to know each other so well, before you spend physical time with him.

When you do meet in person, I think that there will naturally be a hesitation because you are 'live'! It's just a different way of culminating all that you already know, and that too will quickly pass as you assimilate yet more about each other, and it will be as natural as the freckles on your face.

Thanks Jake2008, I like your optimism. :)