Hi,

I am 30 year guy and my ex(aged 27) loved nearly 15 years and she had dumped me now. It’s been a year she had broke with me. We started loving each other from our school days.We lived as a husband and wife.

The problem is that my brother and her sister loved and they got married. After a year they had got divorced due to misunderstanding between them and due to their parents attitude. Her parents had compelled her sister to take divorce. Now my brother got married to other women and he is having 2 kids.

My ex girl brokeup with me saying that my brother had cheated her sister and also her parents doesn’t like me bcoz I will also doing the same.she had broke up at that time and she haven’t contacted for nearly 11/2 years and then she came back saying that she loves me and she doesn’t want to miss me.

Our love again went well for nearly 2 years.In between these 2 years I was stressing that we should get married soon as my parents are stressing and looking for other alliance. When ever I asked her she will tell that let her sister get married first and then we can.

Her parents had found a guy through internet matrimonial site and her sister had got married to him. After 2 months. The same problem had been with them and again she got divorced. This time also I had forced her that don’t waste her life bcoz of her sister and I again stressed for marriage of us. Whenever I insisted about to have marriage, she was not serious about it. So I thought of leaving her for a while and cut all the contacts, then only she might understand my situation and might agree for marriage very soon fear of losing me. My bad time started at time only. My parents were very much serious about my marriage and they started looking for new girl to me.

These all situation made her that I had left her and I am going to marry someone. She cried at her home and her parents came to know that she is love with me again and I had left her again. They had changed her mind her saying that I had also done the same thing as my brother had did.

I had explained her about the entire situation that had happened now she is not ready to accept anything and she broke with me saying not to contact her anymore and there is nothing to talk about and she said that I had also cheated her like my brother.

I tried all my ways to prove that I had not anything purposively but she is still angry and not ready to take me back and she dumped me.I tried to convince her parents called them, they used stupid words against me.I emailed, called, messaged, went to her office, talked to her colleague and begged to her for what I did but she is not willing me to take back and it is been a year since this happened .I stopped contacting and visiting her as she said that she will complaint me to police if I continue to follow her. She says that I am harassing her. She had ill treated me.I want her back even though she behaved in such a manner. My friends are saying better to leave her and get married to other person than only I would forget her but my mind and heart is not to that level to forget her and earlier I believed that one day she might understand me and come back, but as she said that she will complain me to police I lost that hope also.

One thing that stresses my mind is that whether she had found someone better than me or what that could be one of the reason to avoid me. When I think about this I become mad. Sometimes I feel to commit suicide.

Can anyone understand my situation and help me out

The worst thing to do is commit suicide. DO NOT BE A COWARD. You will hurt many people if you do this. Be rational. It hurts, a lot, butyou will not gain anything by moping around. Try to be social and meet people. As friends. See what comes of it.

15 years is a long time man. You are 30 years old. What else is in your life that you value? You need to consider why you are still alive and what you can take away from this. Also, what country are you from?

Break ups suck and a 15 year relationship ending ain't easy and won't be easy to get over, but you have to. You feel like death and that is normal but you aren't dead and you have much going for you. Mourn this loss and clear your emotions, but be patient.

15 years is a very long time. Suicide should not even by on your mind. You're only 30 years old. She's not the only person in the world. There are 6 billion other people in this world. Have you met them all yet? Have you visited the entire planet yet? There's so much out there, why would you let 1 girl bring your whole life down?

Read up on the stickies, for example: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/list-things-do-after-breakup-78597.html

No break up is easy. So many people have gone through a break up and felt extremely depressed. But once you recover from the break up, you actually feel like a much stronger and refreshed person. Just hang in there, I'm sure you'll recover and you'll be giving others advice on relationships. Just be patient and give yourself some time to recover. But I strongly suggest that you read the stickies, they really help a lot. Hopefully you will find some suggestions that can help you recover.

It won't be easy, nor will it happen overnight, but you will get better, if you get a life without her in it, that you enjoy. Its been a long time coming, and works out for the best.

We all feel your pain, and are sorry for your situation, but you must realize she was never in it enough to put your relationship first, and foremost anyway. You spent a lot of years with someone who put everyone else before your own happiness, now is the time to find it for yourself.

Good luck!