So my ex broke up with me over 5 months ago. I loved here dearly and was devistated when she broke up with me. I did all the wrong things for 4 months after the break up. I kept in contact with her a lot and I acted extremely needy and desperate. It, of course, pushed her away and ended up hurting me even more. I only contacted her twice in the past 6 weeks (once to apologize for how I've acted and once to wish her a great last year of college). I'm not going to contact her anymore. I know too much damage has been done for her and I to get back together and that we obviously weren't meant to be.

The problem I'm having now is that I can't shake the feeling that I won't find someone else. She is the only girlfriend I've ever had and I was 22 at the time. Now I'm 23. People always say that I'm a nice and sweet guy. However, I'm really shy so I don't meet many new people and girls aren't usually interested in shy guys. Sometimes I feel like this one relationship I had was a fluke. I know I'm probably being too hard on myself but I'd like to hear what other people think.

Hey Zac... I like many others on amhd will suggest you cut all contact all together. You need to rid yourself of any false hopes. This way you no longer wait by the phone hopeing its her type thing... I broke up with my boyfriend of 8 years last August and haven't spoken to him since January of this year... Long story but I wound up ignoring his calls cause it was to painful... he missed me but yet didn't want to be together. He called about 3 weeks ago... But for me its all or nothing...

I am also 24 and think the same thing... will I ever find someone else?. I know I will but I guess we have to be patient. We don't want to make mistakes again

Im sort of in the same boat now Zac. Especially when it comes to the shy guy part. But I've been working on it. Ive contacted old friends, hung out with them (even though I was nervous about meeting their friends). And although I'm STILL a super shy guy, I just try to not be, as hard as I can. There are SO many people out there you can meet that Im finding it's a wasted life to be 'shy'. So GET OUT THERE, hang out with some friends you don't normally hang with, and MEET NEW PEOPLE. I swear it'll get your mind off the girl, and you'll meet a couple new cuties like I did :)

Good luck friend

You can use this as a launchpad to be who you want to be. Sometimes it takes a significant emotional event, such as a breakup or divorce, to push someone to be a better person. I'm not saying that being shy is a bad thing, but if you're feeling like being shy is keeping you from who you want to be, don't be shy anymore. I used to be terribly shy in high school, and while I'm not the center of attention/ super extrovert now, I'm very content in my ability to make new friends and meet new people.

Don't be afraid of failure, because chances are, you will fail again. Everyone fails. Just get out there and try.