My ex-husband has primary custody of our 3 children, 8, 10, and 11. I get my children for 4 weeks out of the summer, and every other weekend outside summer. Over the past 2 years, my children have been dirty when I go and pick them up... had tattered, dirty, and poorly fitting clothing when I get them. Any decent clothes they have are from me.

All of them have poor reading skills, and my oldest boy barely passed 5th grade. They say he constantly belittles them. They say he never helps them with their homework, and that they don't even have to do their homework if they don't want. Is this educational neglect?

Worst of all, their living conditions are horrible. He has been reported to social services in the past, and all they do is tell him they are going to be doing a home inspection. With that notice ahead of time, he cleans the place up. He has done this several times. He recently received an eviction warning for nonpayment of rent, and an eviction warning to clean his apartment immediately. Can I use this against him?

Can someone tell me how to go about this? I want to file for custody of my children, and I want to build a case beforehand.

You can try to use these points in the hearing, but honestly, if you want any hope of success, you are going to need to hire an attorney.

Courts are hesitant to disrupt children's lives and a custody change does this. It takes a VERY solid case to make this change.

Do the older kids want to come live with you? They are a bit on the young side, but many states will hear their opinions on the matter. Would moving to your house change their school district? If yes, that works against you. Especially if your school district is not markedly better than their current one.

Like I said... your best bet is a lawyer.