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View Full Version : Confused boyfriend / x now ? But I still want him back !


jc114
Aug 15, 2009, 06:07 AM
Hello, id be grateful to whoever gives me a positive answer!

I guess my story is perhaps one of the wierdiest stories one would have evr come across... I met this guy 2 yrs ago and then for the first 6 months we were friends, then I strted liking him and so did he but not as much as I did...

Then we went out for 6 months and then broke up, his reason was that its not working out and he does not have feelings for me

Then for another 6 months I tried getting him back and somehow succeeded and won his love, we went out for 6 months again and now we have separated because I misbehaved with him and because I couldn't nurture the relationship...

But now I have realised my mistake and have understood the sensitivity of the relationship and want him back because I have genuine feelings for him but he says he has none for me BUT he still cares for me and stuff...

I want him back because I still love him so if nyone can help me , how a mans phyciology works so I could get him back ASAP!!

He's a sagitariun and I'm an arian , those are the details!

N0help4u
Aug 15, 2009, 06:34 AM
So you want to love somebody that will not love you back.

Why not find somebody that actually loves you back?

You can not make somebody love you when it just isn't there for them.

He sounds like the type that will find fault with you in another 6 months and dump you again anyway.

From what you are saying instead of communicating problems he just holds it in and dumps you. That is not the way to have a relationship so you are better off without him.

talaniman
Aug 15, 2009, 07:34 AM
I think you want him, more than he wants you. So why do you want someone back, that doesn't want you?

He gave it another try, and it still didn't work, so what's different? What would you do differently? How old are you both?

jc114
Aug 15, 2009, 08:57 AM
The last 6 months, it did work out!! But I messed it up and because of that we broke up so its entirely my fault, it did not work out because of me!! He still cares , and wants to be with me but he says he has no feelings for me! Both of us are 20 although he is 5-6 months older to me

N0help4u
Aug 15, 2009, 09:04 AM
It is not entirely your fault if he wasn't telling you there's a problem lets deal with it.
I hear couples go round and round thinking next get back together will work but it doesn't.

Why would he say he wants to be with you if he has no feelings for you?
That translates to:
I am saying I want to be with you to make you feel better (let you down easy) but NO I don't want you.

IF you are so sure he wants to make it work again why don't you just ask him to get back together then?

BUT IF you do you really need to tell him that part of the problem is that his answer is to bail instead of working problems out.

jc114
Aug 15, 2009, 09:08 AM
He now says that he has no feelings for me, but he's got use to me and he feels lonely because of some family issues and stuff so he wants me to be with him, he cares for me but he says that he has no feelings for me!

N0help4u
Aug 15, 2009, 09:14 AM
So basically you need to accept friends ONLY and not push the issue and not be in it expecting that some day it might get feelings. Let him in HIS OWN time come to learn to have feelings for you.

His feeling lonely should not be a reason to be in a relationship. Your friendship should be based on caring not situations in his life.

jc114
Aug 15, 2009, 09:32 AM
He doesn't want to be in a relationship because of his loneliness in fact he doesn't want it at all , his feelings that he had for me are dead and he says they will never come back..! But being friends with him reminds all those days I spent with him as his girlfriend! And don't want to let go him because mine are not dead as yet! I don't mind being friends with him but as long as I can spend a life with him as his life partner in future!

N0help4u
Aug 15, 2009, 09:36 AM
You are stuck because you only have an either or thing here
It is either be a supportive friend and hope you win him back or leave him alone because you can't handle the hurt.