Forget Rednecks, Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canucks.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
September through May,
You may live in Canada.


If someone in a Home Depot store
Offers you assistance and they don't work there,
You may live in Canada.


If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You may live in Canada.


If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation
With someone who dialed a wrong number,
You may live in Canada.


If 'Vacation' means going anywhere
South of Detroit for the weekend,
You may live in Canada.


If you measure distance in hours,
You may live in Canada.


If you know several people
Who have hit a deer more than once,
You may live in Canada.


If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'
In the same day and back again,
You may live in Canada.


If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow
During a raging blizzard without flinching,
You may live in Canada.


If you install security lights on your house and garage,
But leave both unlocked,
You may live in Canada.


If you carry jumper cables in your car
And your wife knows how to use them,
You may live in Canada.


If you design your kid's Halloween costume
To fit over a snowsuit,
You may live in Canada.


If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km --
You're going 90 and everybody is passing you,
You may live in Canada.


If driving is better in the winter
Because the potholes are filled with snow,
You may live in Canada.


If you know all 4 seasons:
Almost winter, winter, still winter,
And road construction,
You may live in Canada.


If you have more miles
On your snow blower than your car,
You may live in Canada.


If you find 2 degrees 'a little chilly',
You may live in Canada.


If you actually understand these jokes,
You definitely live in Canada.

Lol, I defiantly live in Canada. (;

I KNEW the stories were true! :rolleyes:

I KNEW the stories were true! :rolleyes:

Sadly NM, they are, that's why they're so funny. :p

Sadly NM, they are, that's why they're so funny. :p

Or SAD... :eek:

Or SAD............:eek:

You learn to live with it.

Actually, why do I live here? :confused:

How's the weather down under M?

This is what happens to us Canadians when the weather is always bad. Look at my avatar...

EDIT: Okay changing it now. Lol

You learn to live with it.

Actually, why do I live here? :confused:

How's the weather down under M?

It's actually been very mild lately in Sydney , today its about 18C and sunny. Only 3 weeks of winter left :)


Joe
That's scary :eek:

Joe, I haven't done that in years! ;)

M, 18 degrees celsius? In winter? Really?

Can I stay with you for a while?

M, 18 degrees celsius? In winter? Really?

Can I stay with you for a while?

Of course Alty , when I take you to the Pub people will laugh at me though for bringing a Bunny wiggling it's tushy with a carrott stuck up it's A55 :rolleyes:

Of course Alty , when I take you to the Pub people will laugh at me though for bringing a Bunny wiggling it's tushy with a carrott stuck up it's A55 :rolleyes:

That's not a carrot, that's my tail!

OMG, does it look like a carrot?

They'll laugh more when they hear my accent. ;)

Looks like a carrot to me ;)


OK got to go , cya guys :)

Shouldn't this thread be titled: "A Lesson Abote Canada"? :p

Shouldn't this thread be titled: "A Lesson Abote Canada"? :p

Only if I was a Newfie NM.

I'm not.

We say about here in Alberta. :D

Looks like a carrot to me ;)


ok gotta go , cya guys :)

It's a cute little powder puff tail that just so happens to be orange. :(

Silly M.

Have a beer for me at the pub, K? :)

Aww... I want to go to Canada now... :(

It is too hot here!

Canada jokes eh?

Aww... I wanna go to Canada now... :(

It is too hot here!

You wouldn't survive HH. You have to be born here if you want to live here.

Wait... I wasn't born here.

Now I understand! :cool:

Canada jokes eh?

Another misconception.

Eh is mainly used in Newfoundland, not Alberta. Very few Albertans say eh, no one says aboot, we actually talk like normal humans beings. :)

I say Eh all the time. Does that mean when I move to Alberta everybody will think I am newfie?

I say Eh all the time. Does that mean when i move to Alberta everybody will think i am newfie?

No, you'll blend Joe, no worries. ;)

If you move to Sherwood Park then you'll really blend.

One tip, if you do move to SP, if you get pulled over don't mention that you know me
I hate to see friends in jail. ;)

JH Your new avi is distubing! :eek:

Nah, I still think you all say Aboot, Eh and live in igloos ;)

JH Your new avi is distubing! :eek:

Nah, I still think you all say Aboot, Eh and live in igloos ;)

And drink Molsen

No one drinks Molson anymore. Jeez, most of us drink canadian versions of american beer... or great local microbrewery beers.

Great list Alten, they're all true!

Joe, are you giving up being a maritimer?? Et tu, Brute? I'll be the only one!

Molson is for sissy's. ;)

Real Canadians drink Kokanee! :)

Not an east coast vs west coast battle! LOL!

No one drinks Molson anymore. Jeez, most of us drink canadian versions of american beer... or great local microbrewery beers.

Great list Alten, they're all true!

Joe, are you giving up being a maritimer??? et tu, Brute? I'll be the only one!

People have convinced me to go to the dark side of the moon lol

There is no going back now. Although I guess Labatt blue is not that bad, although I do enjoy my Moosehead Dry. Might have to stock up. (;

People have convinced me to go to the dark side of the moon lol

There is no going back now. Although I guess Labatt blue is not that bad, although I do enjoy my Moosehead Dry. Might have to stock up. (;

We have all that and more in Alberta Joe, you won't have to go without. ;)

Joe, did you post something?

It's blank. :(

It's actually been very mild lately in Sydney , today its about 18C and sunny. Only 3 weeks of winter left :)


Joe
Thats scary :eek:You call 18C "winter?" Lol!

BRI-A3vakVg

This pretty much sums it all up. Lol

You call 18C "winter?" Lol!

Exactly! That's summer! :D

I'm Canadian and I totally get nearly all of these jokes. Well said! I find 2 degrees warm when my American friends are freezing, but I find 30 degrees is like an oven when they find it pleasant.

I'm Canadian and I totally get nearly all of these jokes. Well said! I find 2 degrees warm when my American friends are freezing, but I find 30 degrees is like an oven when they find it pleasant.

30 degrees is not fit for man nor beast. Air conditioning is the only option when it gets that hot! ;)

3 degrees, it's a bit chilly, probably wouldn't wear shorts, but I don't need a jacket, or a long sleeve shirt.

Yes, I am Canadian! :D

Ha! It got to 39 Celsius here today, you wimps.

Hmmm,

Ha! It got to 39 Celsius here today, you wimps.

OMG! That's hot enough to cook meat! How do you survive?

Are you melting?

You must be melting.

Wimps? Wait a minute.

How are you in -30 degrees celsius? You want to try it? We'll see who's a wimp. :D

I know how to wear a parka, and shorts, and long johns. So there.

I know how to wear a parka, and shorts, and long johns. So there.

See now, that's what makes you a wimp.

Canadians don't wear long johns, or a parka, until it gets to -40.

But long johns make such GREAT sleepwear

But long johns make such GREAT sleepwear

I sleep in the buff, even in winter. :D

I prefer a bed.

I prefer a bed.

Bed's are for wimps! :D

Bed's are for wimps! :D

Them's spanking words! Go to my room.

Them's spanking words! Go to my room.

It's too hot in your room. :p

It's too hot in your room. :p

Finally Alty called me hot.

Finally Alty called me hot.

Yes, but it comes in flashes. ;)

You call 18C "winter?" Lol!

Ha Ha... well today it's 21C and Sunny , and still winter :)

Ha Ha.....................well today it's 21C and Sunny , and still winter :)

I'm jealous.

I'm seriously jealous.

M, you would die in Canada during the winter! :eek:

That sounds like our winters, M. Of course, I've been known to surf on Christmas break (but it was a long time ago)

Well Xmas is the middle of Summer for us Cats.

That sounds like our winters, M. Of course, I've been known to surf on Christmas break (but it was a long time ago)

Surf?

On water?

No way!

Skiing, snowboarding, sledding, on a warmer day, otherwise you will freeze to death.

There's a reason that so many babies are born in September, because the winter is cold and long! :)

Well Xmas is the middle of Summer for us Cats.

OOOoooh! Me likey.

Sounds like summer weather Friend.

If only we could get that warm.

Can not wait to see the Rockies, and enjoy the alberta winter. Lol

Hopefully the snow does not come until after October.

Sounds like summer weather Friend.

If only we could get that warm.

Joe, your avy is seriously freaking me out! :eek:

Can not wait to see the Rockies, and enjoy the alberta winter. Lol

Hopefully the snow does not come until after October.

Shall I change it to some naked girl doing a loop dance in the buff, sure the guys won't mind, but I might get banned. Sure you guys will know how to keep in touch.

I was tempted to put a naked dancing chick as my avatar.

I don't know. I just think of it as an instructional video for tongue exercises, kind of like kegels.

Dare me to put the dancing naked chick up. Dare me, Dare me. Lol

What about one of these Joe ;)

23328


23329

All right. I double dog dare you. Tell Ben I did.

Dare me to put the dancing naked chick up. Dare me, Dare me. lol

I will not tempt you to do wrong! I will not!

As for snow in October. Well, let's just say, buy little cheeks a costume that fits over a snow suit. ;)

The malls here actually pass out candy so you can stay indoors.

Parents with hot chocolate and bailey's, walking around the block with their kids, dogs in jackets, snow pants, boots, scarves, they might as well not even bother dressing up, the people just answer the door, throw candy and shut the door as fast as they can so they don't get cold.

It's fun! :)

[QUOTE=friend4u178;1917623]What about one of these Joe ;)

I like the whipping girl...

Couldn't help myself...

http://alllayedout.com/Images/Animated_Images/graphics/elation.gif

Oh and the bottom one is for Alty :D

Shazzy, there's no top pic :confused:

Sure there is NM! It's a white girl, with brown hair with blue streaks, pretty much nude, with a floating... shawl?. floating around her, some nice shadowing on her mid section, and she is jumping up and down ;).

Here's a link, maybe you can see it then:
http://alllayedout.com/Images/Animated_Images/graphics/elation.gif

Sure there is NM! It's a white girl, with brown hair with blue streaks, pretty much nude, with a floating... shawl?... floating around her, some nice shadowing on her mid section, and she is jumping up and down ;). with bouncing bazongas

Here's a link, maybe you can see it then:
http://alllayedout.com/Images/Animated_Images/graphics/elation.gif

;)

What have you people done to my thread? :eek:

Invasion of the boobies...

Invasion of the boobies...

Everywhere we go. ;)

And that's the way we like it! ;)

And that's the way we like it! ;)

That's what all the boys say. ;)

Man these threads devolve into teen chat rooms.

Man these threads devolve into teen chat rooms.

You're only as young as you feel NK. :D

Do you feel 17 Alt? Then you would be ripe for the pickin's! ;)

Do you feel 17 Alt? Then you would be ripe for the pickin's! ;)

Even at 17 I would have been too much for you to handle. ;)

We should continue our chitchat in the appropriate forum guys, we're going to get into trouble.

Not that I'm not used to it, but I'm trying to spare all of you.

Meet you in the castle. :)

Exactly! That's summer! :DIn Canada and much of the US, yes, it is!

I loved this. Loved this so much I'm posting it on my Faceybook ;)

Sarah

Alty - You forgot about the Canadian tourists in South Florida in the winter. They come in droves and actually go into the water in Jan and Feb when the air temperature is about 40 degrees and think it's warm. Yep. I've seen them do this. My favorite thing was to spot some guys in nothing but speedos headed to the beach from the Swimming Hall of Fame in Ft. Lauderdale Beach area and casually ask them if they were from Canada. Why, yes we are. How did you know? They'd reply. My reply was always, "Oh, just a lucky guess".

Hilarious. We got it all down here, great weather(although today hurricane bill is supposed to hit.) Great neighbours(the best I know). And of course the show The Littles Hobo(don't know what it is, click the YouTube link in my signature.)

SO I can stand here and say quite proudly I AM CANADIAN.:)

Good luck with Bill rex. I'm just north of you and we don't expect much but you guys are due for a good soaking.

150 mm of rain, and lots of rain. Sounds like it is going to be a brute.

The part that I am in Nova Scotia didn't get hit too hard. But other parts of the province did. And the rain wasn't too bad as today and yesterday I had to dig a 630ft. Trench for an ingeround fence for my dog. Whoever says a girl can't dig... Ha I could outdig all the guys. It was me and my mom out dig, my dad and 2older brothers wouldn't help!