My teen is agood lad 16 I'm single mum he sees his dad 24/7 outside at school with others he is polite with me he talks to me like crap no respect at all he,doesn't go out much he stays at home almost 24/7 has few friends who he rules also spends all time on he's p.c on yugio cards quite immature what have I done for him to speak to me so bad calls me retard whore and just speaks to me like he the adult rules the house never sociable to my friends family or boyfriend or others shuts down.grade a+ student at college teachers adore him

[QUOTE=chembakuli;1913336]my teen is agood lad 16 I'm single mum he sees his dad 24/7 outside at school with others he is polite with me he talks to me like crap no respect at all he,doesn't go out much he stays at home almost 24/7 has few friends who he rules also spends all time on he's p.c on yugio cards quite immature what have I done for him to speak to me so bad calls me retard whore and just speaks to me like he the adult rules the house never sociable to my friends family or boyfriend or others shuts down.grade a+ student at college teachers adore him[ he does nothing round the house never helps can't ground him he doesn't go anywhere I never give him any money unless he does jobs like mowing,I cook clean give him nice home he he's TV in room sky and p.c... he has lovley home and I work but he is so rude to me why please help everyone says he little towarsd me not to him he's bro is total oppositte its auwfull I love him dearly please help.

You have two or three sentences all ran together so it is hard to tell what you are saying or even asking.

It looks like your major problem is he disrespects you by calling you names and doesn't help around the house unless you pay him.

You say he is 16 and a straight A student in college.

He stays in the house 24/7 but he sees his dad outside of school 24/7

I am confused

I am sorry I was so tired 3am nightshift at hospital and very stressed.ok here goes.my son whom I love and adore was always a quite loving independent child mummys little clinger,at age of 11 I divorced his dad amicably both had enough ,my son was already starting to act out outragous comments and hurling abuse swearing,I guess he heard us arguing so I thought I best take action and divorced then my eldest 18 and my now 16 yr old and me found place to live and all OK until 16 yr old became so aggressive abusive to me my older son moved in with his dad he who is very happy see,s me all the time.. we have great relationship dec my other son speaks to me as though I was trash and hopes I die and tells me I'm disgusting xcuse for human being and mother I don't give him any money unless he does jobs and his father gives him anything he wants he also abuses him verbally... never violent he is a straight a soon to be college student never goes out happy to be at home does no chores at all thinks I'm trash and waste of space,thick insecure usless.. dont no how to deal with this angry wild nasty child who was so lovley all his teachers think he is an angel I want to help him but don't no how.he seems to rule the house I work own home do every thing for him... I think its my fault how can he hate me so much no respect at all

Does your ex back you up with discipline?
What does he say?
Does your son ever let you ask him to talk with you rationally.
I think you need to sit him down and discuss exactly what bothers him, give him your side of the story and try working on some answers together.
As long as he is getting away with this behavior he is just building up more and more justification of why he feels the way he does.

He is doing like many kids when their parents divorce. Blaming you is one of the main things they will do.

But It was 8 years ago he has had contact with his dad 24/7 since we are best friends now have been for many years I have tried all you say and more even packed his stuff to go stay with his dad so he appreciates what I do for him he says I don't listen to him and I get angry but hedoesnt understand he is not the parent I am he says I'm trying to be he's friend when I punish him he laughs tells me ill give I'm weak make him sick... then other days he's lovley... he hates my ex new wife he thinks everyone is wrong he is right... you just can't get word in so angry won't listen...

No matter how long ago you divorced he still could have been effected by it more than you realize. He sounds like he knows what buttons to push and that is exactly what he is doing.

Maybe pack his bags and have dad there to actually take him. Then he will see you aren't bluffing.

I wasn't bluffing I actually took him there but for him its like a holiday as dad can't cope disabled gives him loads money and lets him get aay with murder,, why does he hate me so much when I give him so much love materiely nothing just home comforts and dinners and washing.. usual stuff Im scared for him that as he gets older he have no social skills and hate me more

Oh you actually did go through with leaving him

I think his problem is he has no respect for women and your providing for him is only going to make him grow up looking for a second mom in a girlfriend.

You need to figure out how to do some tough love to get through to him.

oh you actually did go through with leaving him

I think his problem is he has no respect for women and your providing for him is only going to make him grow up looking for a second mom in a gf.

You need to figure out how to do some tough love to get through to him.

OK I am a really tuff independent women who deals with beautiful complex need children every day but Imno walk over just my son seems to do it to me putting me down allthe time like he's in charge or knows better... why... Im not in competition I want him to understand I love him no matter what but Im in charge I am the adult he just laughs... no respect.. my parents brought me up with so much disciline and anger I respected them but was very scared... dont want that for my sons other son is an angel so what went wrong I don't give him anything much to take away buys all his own stuff.from dads money.what can you suggest... help??