Hi,my english name is Mike, a Chinese colledge student,22.I am unhappy almost all the time and it has been years.I don't think I can suffer this any more so I come to the internet for help.
Yeah I think I have been suffering from depression.

1.I was born in a poor family.when I was a child,my parents were always in a bad mood because of the poverty. Then they quarreled very often.my dad broke glass es by dropping it on the grond.my mum cried , on the bed,unwilling to have meals.things always happened like this.and once my dad made my brother and me ,holding food in our hands, stand on the knees in front of the bed on which my poor mum were lying and beg "have lunch please mum.." "i should have kill myself if i don't have you two.."
After I started school, study is all that I have to do.
2.then I was shortsighted when I was only about 11 . Thanks to the poverty and my never-educationed father, I got many cheap glasses in rather poor quality I think. My short sight changed me a lot. I hate glasses. When I was in the high school, there was a time I wanted to kill myself and end all that I was suffering.I didn't because of my parents. They suffered a lot for me and I have duty and I don't want them heart-struck because of my death. And now the degree of my present glasses are over 800. And this means when I get married and have a baby, the possibility for it to have a healthy pair of eyes 50 percent. And I am likely to become blind in the future I think.
3.I fell in love two years ago. I thougt she almost was the only excuse for my continuing to live in this world after experiencing my own disappointing family life. But half a year later she parted me. Then half a year later she came back for me. And then half a year later I parted her. Nearly two months later I back to her. And now, I think it is almost the time again..
4.I will be a senior a month later and I am going to graduate but I don't think I am going to find a good job. There is alwas pressure on me.
5...

I don't have interest in anything, I don't want talk to any people, especilly someone I am familier with. But I can feel free relaxed to talk to stangers sometimes. Last night, I got ready to sleep, lying on the bed with eyes closed.my brother came and asked me "you are silent all these days, can you tell me what's going on with you? i'm your only brother." but I kept still, eyes closed but there's tears. I said nothing because I don't want to say to him"i think i am suffered from depression, my dear brother. you can't help me.but thank you."

Please go to your college's counseling office and ask for help. You are an important person and deserve an improvement in your life.

Hi,my english name is mike, a Chinese colledge student,22.I am unhappy almost all the time and it has been years.I don't think I can suffer this any more so I come to the internet for help.
Yeah I think I have been suffering from depression.

1.I was born in a poor family.when I was a child,my parents were always in a bad mood because of the poverty. Then they quarreled very often.my dad broke glass es by dropping it on the grond.my mum cried , on the bed,unwilling to have meals.things always happened like this.and once my dad made my brother and me ,holding food in our hands, stand on the knees in front of the bed on which my poor mum were lying and beg "have lunch please mum.." "i should have kill myself if i don't have you two.."
After I started school, study is all that I have to do.
2.then I was shortsighted when I was only about 11 . Thanks to the poverty and my never-educationed father, I got many cheap glasses in rather poor quality I think. My short sight changed me a lot. I hate glasses. When I was in the high school, there was a time I wanted to kill myself and end all that I was suffering.I didn't because of my parents. They suffered a lot for me and I have duty and I don't want them heart-struck because of my death. And now the degree of my present glasses are over 800. And this means when I get married and have a baby, the possibility for it to have a healthy pair of eyes 50 percent. And I am likely to become blind in the future I think.
3.I fell in love two years ago. I thougt she almost was the only excuse for my continuing to live in this world after experiencing my own disappointing family life. But half a year later she parted me. Then half a year later she came back for me. And then half a year later I parted her. Nearly two months later I back to her. And now, I think it is almost the time again..
4.I will be a senior a month later and I am going to graduate but I don't think I am going to find a good job. There is alwas pressure on me.
5.I dream a lot.I have several dreams every night. I can almost feel my brain running. They are no good dreams. Sometime weird , sometime scaring,like running in the boundless darkness. Dreams tire me. And I have been very forgetfull sense I was in the high school. I think I am going to forget everything when I am old, and need caring.
6.I don't think I have a true friend.
7..
..

I don't have interest in anything, I don't want talk to any people, especilly someone I am familier with. But I can feel free relaxed to talk to stangers sometimes. Last night, I got ready to sleep, lying on the bed with eyes closed.my brother came and asked me "you are silent all these days, can you tell me what's going on with you? i'm your only brother." but I kept still, eyes closed but there's tears. I said nothing because I don't want to say to him"i think i am suffered from depression, my dear brother. you can't help me.but thank you."

Please help me.
I really don't think I will come back here . If there is anyone who can and is willing to help me ,
I will appreciate if you copy this and send to someone who can really help me.
Thanks for your reading this.
Best regards.
Mike

thanks for your reading this.
best regards.mike
Mike, continue to post on this site, please. Is there one thing that is good in your life?

Hi mike , just because you grew up a certain way doesn't mean that's how you'll be for ever. It sounds like your father was a good man who did and said some bad things. When your family life is messed up it will make you very depressed. I understand. You have to forgive your father mike for the things that he did to you when you were a little boy. Taking your life is not the answer to your problems. Believe me mike when I say every one has problems. When there are people who love you they will be hurt. You've got to make it threw the hard times inorder to one day see the good again. Your sleep isn't peaceful mike because your not at peace with your life. Don't believe and get in agreeance with those negative thoughts that keep coming in your mind. Don't go around believing that you'll be blind and something will be wrong with your baby. Have you ever heard the saying as a man thinkth so is he . Well that goes for good and bad. You need to concentrate or focus on good things. When those negative thoughts come in your head like example (you'll go blind by the time your thirty) speak out loud my eyesight is getting better and better every day. Don't just speak it mike believe it . Ive done this myself and I'm living proof it works. Write back and let us know how things are going for you mike. Love you as a friend. Don't give up!!

Hi, Mike!

What sort of good things have happened in your life, please? Are you into the arts like music, visual arts or drama?

Thanks!

hi mike , just because you grew up a certain way doesnt mean that's how you'll be for ever. It sounds like your father was a good man who did and said some bad things. When your family life is messed up it will make you very depressed. I understand. You have to forgive your father mike for the things that he did to you when you were a little boy. taking your life is not the answer to your problems. believe me mike when I say every one has problems. when there are people who love you they will be hurt. you've got to make it threw the hard times inorder to one day see the good again. your sleep isn't peaceful mike because your not at peace with your life. dont believe and get in agreeance with those negative thoughts that keep coming in your mind. Dont go around believing that you'll be blind and something will be wrong with your baby. have you ever heard the saying as a man thinkth so is he . well that goes for good and bad. you need to concentrate or focus on good things. when those negative thoughts come in your head like example (you'll go blind by the time your thirty) speak out loud my eyesight is getting better and better every day. dont just speak it mike believe it . Ive done this myself and I'm living proof it works. write back and let us know how things are goin for you mike. love ya as a friend. dont give up!!!

Hi,thank you flayvur. There are always good ideas in my mind, but I find I barely put them into practice. Maybe I am just as lazy as my dad or something. What you said is reasonable I know. I just don't believe I can put that into practice or stick on it . I will reread all that you said to me. I will try that. flayvur my friend , thanks for your kind help.

Hi, Mike!

What sort of good things have happened in your life, please? Are you into the arts like music, visual arts or drama?

Thanks!

Yes I love art. But you know , education in China is very different from yours. What's more, I am from a poor family. So I don't have extra time and money for things like art. Althouth I can't do art , I like art all the time.

Hi again, Mike!

Are you going to answer the things that Wondergirl and I asked of you?

Thanks!

Hi again, Mike!

Are you going to answer the things that Wondergirl and I asked of you?

Thanks!


Hi,sorry I don't know how this site operates. Maybe you can gain more right from this site if I answer your question in time. But I think I have already answered you. And for another, I am new here and I don't know how to use these things. You make me think that you and Wondergirl are working on this site. My English is not that good. I don't know if I have expressed myself exactly . Anyway, thanks.

Please go to your college's counseling office and ask for help. You are an important person and deserve an improvement in your life.

I don't think they can help. Things like that in our country are not developed.and I don't want to my classmates know this. In their eyes I am not that depressed. Thank you .

What's this?.

Mike, continue to post on this site, please. Is there one thing that is good in your life?

Sorry I don't know.. what is 'good''..

Mike she s asking you is there anything in your life that you like. Aprove of, your happy with.

Mike, continue to post on this site, please. Is there one thing that is good in your life?

Yes.I like art. And I aprreciate the spirit of freedom in America. I like to stay alone and do my own little things or do nothing . This gives me much peacefull time . And I want to see every people are in equal . I want to see the world that I can see I peaceful. I want help others. BUT I am still a poor college student, no money ,no time . I even have no power to help myself , then how to help others?

yes i love art. but u know , education in China is very different from yours. whats more, i am from a poor family. so i don't have extra time and money for things like art. althouth i can't do art , i like art all the time.

What sort of things would you like to do in art, or the arts, if you were able to do them, Mike?

Thanks!

hi,sorry i don't know how this site operates. maybe u can gain more right from this site if i answer your question in time. but i think i have already answered you. and for another, i am new here and i don't know how to use these things. u make me think that u and Wondergirl are working on this site. my English is not that good. i don't know if i have expressed myself exactly . anyway, thanx.

You're doing just fine here, Mike! Please do continue to post! You're also correct, that you had already answered me. I just missed your post.

Thanks!

What sort of things would you like to do in art, or the arts, if you were able to do them, Mike?

Thanks!

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Clough again."---what dose this mean?


I like to take pictures, write. And I also dream I can own and play piano . I wanted to take drawing course when I was in the high school .but it seemed absurd in others' eyes. I do think I have a sense of beauty. I also like to listen old-time music like drama.

Mike don't worry about what people say about what you want to do with your life. Every great person who did great things did things in there life that were not of the norm, which means here in america it was different than what everyone else did. Don't be afraid to be you. Everyone is different we were not meant to be alike. If people would just accept other people for who they are the world would be a much peaceful place. Also don't feel so obligated to hide the fact that your depressed. Im not telling your to tell everyone you talk to about it but you should have someone in your life that you can be honest with about your feelings.

I know what you are feeling mike I am livening the same thing . The only thing is it started when my boyfriend of 6 years broke it off with off , and I am not talking about something that happened a long time ago I am talking about one week ago . I don't feel like doing any thing . I cry every night every night . Just like you I don't have anyone that I feel comfortable sheering with . I would love to talk to someone that is not going to judge me just lesion. But say this to say that I hope u find love and happens soon