View Full Version : What to do
cflower
Jul 15, 2009, 07:51 PM
Me nad my husband have been together for 7 years and we have 2 children together,lately it seems that we lead 2 different lives I am the stay at home mom with 3 children and he is the work dad.when he gets home he eats and then sleeps can't get him to do anything around the house because he works heavy constrction,it feels like I a on my own with the kids.lately he has been relying on an alternate source to deal with his job.he does not drink or do any heavy drugs but some things as far as perscription drugs have come to play a factor in a weekly event.then he takes those for pain and then still sleeps and has no involvement in the family.I am about done with this and can't take it anymore will someone please help me!! I do love him and I was married 13 years before going with this one,but seems he has to have a supplement for an escape from his job but all I do is watch him sleep and there is no interaction but resentment on my part
ChihuahuaMomma
Jul 15, 2009, 08:11 PM
Sounds like the man needs a vacation. A family vacation. He needs a break from working. He needs a break from you asking things of him when he gets home. He needs a grace period. Say, one hour before you ask any favors. After said vacation, or better yet ON said vacation perhaps you should suggest AA for his drug abuse.
jenniepepsi
Jul 15, 2009, 08:31 PM
Sounds like marriage ;) hehe.
My marriage is in essentially the same situation. I would suggest you get some counseling together. Marriage counseling. You would be amazed at how much you can learn this way.
Also, TALK TALK TALK. Let him know that you are unhappy with the way your marriage has been going and you would like to work on it together.
Gemini54
Jul 15, 2009, 10:32 PM
Sometimes, people sleep a lot in relationships as a way of not interacting with their families or when they have problems that they don't want to deal with.
I agree with both ChihuahuaMomma and jenniepepsi that a holiday and some talk time are needed. There may be issues between you that are unresolved and that need to be aired, or it may be that he has other things that are bothering him.
In any case, ignoring the situation will not help either of you. Can you start by taking a weekend off? Can the children be looked after by someone else for a couple of days so that you can have some time to yourselves?
It sounds as if the fun and lightness has gone out of your lives - is there some way that you can start interacting as friends again and doing things together as a family?
You might also need to follow up on his use of prescription drugs - is it legitimate use or is it abuse?
I'm sorry that this advice puts the onus on you to make the changes, but sometimes in relationships us women have to give our partners the proverbial 'kick in the butt'!