I'm 19 and me and my boyfriend have been together for about a year. Our sex life is at its best, but yet he keeps telling me he wants to try new things.
Hes mentioned anal sex, and not only does the idea disgust me, when we tried it, I felt like I was losing my virginity all over again, except the pain was unbearable.

Despite my pure dislike of the subject, I'm curious if we're doing something wrong. My friends have told me that they've done it and after the 1st time it was as pleasurable, if not, more pleasurable than vaginal intercourse. This idea makes me want to try it, but I'm TERRIFIED of the pain I had experienced before.

p.s. even when he "slips" its excruciating...

If you are not COMPLETELY relaxed, you're never going to enjoy anal sex.

If you think the idea is "disgusting", I suggest you find other ways to spice things up.

Use lots and lots of lube.
I wouldn't suggest it without it. But it's a personal choice if you like it or not. But only do it if you want to try it. Don't let him push you in to it.

If if hurts real bad then your body could be telling you nmot to do it.

After relentless nagging my partner and I tried anal sex.
He had done it before but it was my first time.

It did not hurt but I didn't enjoy it.
I told him and he respected that and doesn't want me to do it again.

You need to talk to him and tell him that you don't want to do it.
If he respects you he will respect your wishes.

Use lube. Don't do it for him, do it for you (if you decide to).

OK thank you everybody

Im mainly doing it out of curiosity but we didn't try lube, so ill try it.

Trying something new is good,you learn if you like it or not...
When my ex husband tormented me to try anal I finally relented,nope,its not for me,he loved it,and sure why not he nearly tore me a new a**e..
When I turned the tables on him,I would have had more of a chance of becoming queen of the world before he'd let me put anything up his bottom.
So,what I'm trying to say is,what's good for the goose should be put up the ganders bottom too!

You don't need to be jumping strait into anal sex. You need to start with fingers. Have him preform oral sex on you, and when you are in the midst of an orgasm, he can slowly insert one finger in (be sure that finger is absolutely SMOTHERED in lube or your vaganal juices)

Slowly, ever ever so slowly increase to 2 fingers, 3 fingers, and THEN you can try anal sex.

There are also training kits. http://www.bettersex.com/Dildos/Dongs/Anal-Dildos-and-Dongs/sp-anal-training-kit-1143.aspx?cm_mmc=VSM-_-NA-_-Google-_-%5Banal%20training%20kit%5D&sc=7PG&ad=2204019919

I've found anal sex to be more painful then pleasureable but every one has there preference. They do have a special lube at most porn stores for I think $5.oo. Its called anal ease. It's a decenatizer that is suppose to numb you especially for your first couple times I would suggest trying that. But its not for everyone. You may still not like it. But a lot of people do. If your seriously wanting to try it then I would suggest that. It might start getting easier after awhile just like sex. But don't push yourself to do anything that hurts too bad. It could seriously hurt you. It can cause hemroids and everything else. But GOOD LUCK.

ok thank you everybody

Im mainly doing it out of curiosity but we didnt try lube, so ill try it.

If you didn't use lubrication, then OF COURSE you found it excruciating, not only were you nervous, there is not any natural lubrication there.

Anal sex can be quite pleasurable but you have to do it properly.

Use lube (lots) and he will have to make a very slow enterance, you have to be fully relaxed and every time that you feel pain stop and wait while your sphincter relaxs. Do not have him withdrawl, just stop where he is until you are ready again. Using fingers with trim tidy nails can help the sphincter to relax prior to entry also.

Communication is key to trying and enjoying anal sex. It should not be a painful experience.

[QUOTE=Justwantfair;1843232]If you didn't use lubrication, then OF COURSE you found it excruciating, not only were you nervous, there is not any natural lubrication there.

Yes yes yes... that makes a lot of sense. Haha I feel reeeaaally stupid right now. Of course, lube... ill definitely try it and see how that goes. Thank you so much for your help. There's no one else I can ask these kind of questions to except my gay best friends with out feeling awkward haha:o

I'll bet you that he figures he can just ram it in... fact is you need to learn to relax, and he needs to learn how to listen to you. Move slowly, use lub and it not only won't hurt, but it feels great.

And at 19 your sex life isn't at its best... you really have no time of reference at 19... marry the right partner, get to know each other like you can't possibly do at 19, and you will find out what great sex can really be like. I'm 47, been married 17 years and let me tell you sex is better than I EVER dreamed of at 19, or even in my 20's, and I have a really good imagination, always have.

I got it. Relax, use lube, and communicate.
Thank u
And smoothy haha let me correct myself, our sex life is at its best YET. I'm pretty sure you are completely correct on the matter as far as sex further down the road.

Okay... PLEASE do not use chat speak.

You are an adult. Type like one.

Go with the lube honey! The first time I tried it I was not only nervous, I halfway wanted to, and his... manhood, was pretty expansive. You would be amazed at the different kinds of lube people use, some have an ingredient that can help like Anal Ease, it makes you a little less sensitive. Personally, I am a fan of a silicone based lubricant. They can be a pain to clean off, but they won't dry out like a water-based lubricant can. If you go with water-based, take along a little spray bottle, one little mist and it pops the life right back into the lubricant.