Hello. Some of you know most of my story. But just to be clear.


I met my daughters father when I was a freshman in high school. We were together 7 years, until I gave birth to our daughter (I use the term OUR daughter losely) and he left a month later.
The last I heard from him, was when we went to court to establish child support. Back in 2003 when my daughter was about 6 months old

I have sole custody, with the right to chose when and IF I decide to let him see her. (which he has never even wanted, not once)

He paid child support for about 4 years. And has now stopped back in February. (my daughter is 5 now)



Do I need his permission to leave the state, given that I have sole custody?

do i need his permission to leave the state, given that i have sole custody?

Your custodial agreement should outline this. I'd double check it just to be safe.

If you really want to play it safe, send a letter to the court stating your intention. Send him a certified letter stating the same. If he wants to contest it, let him go to court - odds are he won't bother.

Nah I doubt very seriously that he would even care. But I want to make sure. I will have to contact the court. I don't seem to have the custody part of the paperwork anymore. Grrr. Figures. Just one more thing to work through :P lol oh well.

Thanks hon

nah i doubt very seriously that he would even care. but i want to make sure. i will have to contact the court. i dont seem to have the custody part of the paperwork anymore. grrr. figures. just one more thing to work thru :P lol oh well.

thanks hon

No problem. You can always get another copy of the paperwork; depending on how many pages there are, it'll probably cost $10-15.

I still say send the letter just to be safe :)

Hehe k :) thanks hon

By "leave the state" do you mean a visit or move?

Visit- No
Move- Even with you having Sole custody there was obviously a hearing where he was granted some custody rights. Chances are you could just go, BUT because he has been established legally as father with "rights", I would notify as he could try to use the relocation requirements (different by state) against you and cause unnecessary problems for you.

If you have sole legal custody and there is no visitation agreement, then you are free to move anywhere you want. The only time a custodial parent's ability to move may be constrained is when it would interfere with court ordered visitation. If that's not the case, then feel free to move.

What I would do is inform the court of the move and ask what would be necessary to change jurisdiction to your new location.

His paying or not paying has little to do with other parts of the child custody agreement.

I see he has a "right" to see the child if you let him, so he does have some level of visits.

So if I was his attorney, I would say I did have visits rights and of course merely say you would never let me see the child.
*** can you prove no?

So since he has some visit rights, the court may rule you can't move without his permission if he would object and file a motion with them.

Mmm would it make a diffrence if I COULD prove that I have made her available by email on myspace? I have all of the emails saved from when she was a baby.


Also would that help if we decide to ask him to terminate his rights so that my husband can adopt her

I would think you can just go. But to be safe I would write a letter to the courts at least 30 days prior to moving. They might have a hearing but chances are he won't show up and your good to go strings unattached. Good luck.