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View Full Version : Should I worry? Or let it go?


Mrwho
Jun 6, 2009, 07:26 AM
I’m a 22 yo male and have been with my girlfriend for a little over a year. She is 22 also and has had only 2 previous partners before me. In the first 3-4 months I would say our intimacy was at a high. We would have sex regularly almost 3-4 times a day and things went well. One problem is the here and now. When we first got together, I was attempting to go down on her (because I love oral giving and receiving) but she always pulled me up because she was nervous, she had never gotten it before. Eventually I got down there and things were good. But that’s not the end of it. She had also never performed oral sex. So one evening I got her to try it and she truly didn’t seem to mind and time going forward when I would ask she always did and even let me ejaculate and she would simply swallow and go on with out complaint. During those first 3-4 months, she also tried anal for the first time with me and seemed to enjoy it too.

But since then… it seems that she’s a bit less interested. Having been cheated one once in the past, I started to worry she was losing interest in me and maybe in the relationship, but I honestly don’t think that. In my old relationship, we began to see each other less often, communication fell, intimacy was almost non-existent and it was almost obvious she wanted something more. So instead of crying and fighting about it, I let it go and moved on. With my current girlfriend, we still do everything together, we still hang with the same crowds, she still calls me all the time when I’m away and vice versa, and the only thing that seems to have changed is that, our sex is less spontaneous, she says she really doesn’t want to go down anymore, doesn’t let me go down and says that anal now hurts her and so now when we do have sex, its almost blah and the same and I try to arouse her and be different and go in, but when she stops me I grow frustrated. So when she is ready to jump in, I just kind of do it, just to do it now…. And it’s boring. Is this normal? Should I worry? Or just let it go, know that this girl truly does love me?

bronzebabe
Jun 6, 2009, 08:56 AM
Talk to her about that. If you really LOVE this girl, you need to be open and honest with her. Or, the relationship is over. You know that.

kg_baller
Jun 6, 2009, 09:06 AM
People's ideas and thoughts change over time, but you do need to talk to her about it to find out why.

jjwoodhull
Jun 6, 2009, 09:11 AM
It is very common for the frequency and excitement of sex to drop off as the relationship goes on. However, if she is acting uncomfortable then you need to ask her about it.

Be sure that you do it in a loving way. DO NOT ASK BEFORE, DURING OR AFTER SEX! Tell her that you love her and want her to be happy. Ask her to open up to you.

griffers90
Jun 7, 2009, 05:52 AM
You two need to talk and do it NOW. She obviously doesn't realise this is upsetting and frustrating you otherwise she'd be bringing it up herself.There could be many reasons she's suddenly cooled off in the oral department. Ask her what she wants if she tries to get away with a "I don't know" don't let it drop. Tell her it is something you need to discuss because you do not want it to effect your relationship and it is starting to make you loose confidence in yourself. If she loves you she will be mortified that your confidence has been effected and will talk openly with you. The conversation won't be easy but you need to have it.

Good luck chick! X