Threads merged and entire post was edited for clarity and clean up.


Okay, quick questions.

1) When my boyfriend and I first started having sex it was amazing and I could finish over and over and over... well you get the point. Now I can get wet but when it comes time for the big explosion nothing happens. It still feels good but nothing comes out. Im dried up and this has never happened before. Is there anything I can do to hydrate myself where it is back to the way it was before?

2) I really want to spice things up in the bedroom with my boyfriend but the thing is he views me as the sweet innocent girl who wants to be taught. I want to take control, I want to make his eyes roll into the back of his head. I just... honestly don't know what to do. He doesn't like me on top because the first time we tried it, it really hurt me. I mean I have dressed up as a couple stupid things... his favorite the school girl. But its not enough. Im not getting anything out of our sex life anymore. I mean I love being close to him but I'm getting pounded, and ripped open, and I can't walk the next day and I'm still NOT getting off. I want to have fun and be creative its just that I don't have the slightest idea about where to start. Please help... :)

3) My boyfriend says that he can't feel anything when we have sex with a condom. My ex told me the same thing and him and I ended up not having sex until he wore one and afterwards he just pouted. Me and my new boyfriend have had unprotected sex but I also freaked out and took the "morning after" pill. We haven't had sex since that incident and I want him to wear a condom... so tell me guys is it true that he can't feel anything or is he just stuck on sex without a condom?

3) I have had guys tell me that too... I think that it de-sensitizes the penis every time my husband puts one on he goes soft so I agree it must not feel as good but under no circumstance do you have sex without a condom if you do not feel comfortable

3) This is a common complaint. Some men say there's no difference in feeling whether they use a condom or not; others complain they can't feel anything.

As I'm sure you know, not using a condom not only greatly increases your chances of pregnancy, but you're at an extremely high risk of getting a STD. He might be "clean" now but there have been cases of STDs that haven't shown up for years after the person caught it.

The bottom line is that if you are not comfortable having unprotected sex, then he should not be forcing you to do it through guilt! You shouldn't be making a decision based on pouting and complaining. If he isn't mature enough to respect your wishes, it's time to find a new boyfriend.

3) You can feel it, just not as "great" as you do without a condom. Sometimes guys use this as a ploy to get the girl to agree with not wearing one. If he doesn't want to wear one, he isn't respecting your morals or how you feel.

You are obviously young, I think that you are trying to grow up too fast.

You need to work on communicating with your partner, so that you learn to enjoy sex.

You also always have the opportunity to wait until you are more ready.

At your age, it shouldn't be worrying about a boyfriend complaining about wearing a condom, the Plan B pill, pregnancy and not enjoying sex.

Sex is special, don't feel bad for waiting.

How old are you?

Maybe you are not ready to be in a sexual relationship. It sounds like you are pushing yourself to be comfortable and you are not.

Everyone matures at different rates, why not wait until your body is ready.


I am 17... 18 in July

Yeah, I agree--its much harder to feel with a Condom. The smell of a condom is a real turn-off.

17 almost 18 isn't that old... and it does seem (to me from your other posts) that sex has a big focus in your life. If your Boyfriend doesn't want to wear a condom and you aren't on the pill, well too bad for him.

Also it seems that the two of you need to communicate about sex. Its not a one way street and if you feel like it is, well then you need to talk to him about it.

What is the rest of your relationship like? What else do the two of you do together?

I can't really add to the feel of a condom... but if you're uncomfortable without a condom, then he should respect that!

Have you considered other forms of birth control? (pills, shots etc.) Maybe you could take a trip to your physician and have a talk about it. And make sure that both for you are STD free (etc.)

I agree with Roxy. If he does not want to wear a condom, then other options need to be explored TOGETHER. Birth control is not solely your responsibility. First, get tested to be sure that you are both free of STDs. Then find birth control that works for both of you. Also, if you choose to not use a condom, be sure that your relationship is monogomous.

Not only do you need better communications, but more education about your own bodies, and what sex is really all about. That's where you talk, and let each other know what's going on, so adjustments can be made.

Spice up your bedroom, life with knowledge of yourself and each other, not just with games, and gimmicks, but you'll learn, as you learn more about yourselves.

Condoms can save your life, use them along with other birth control methods. If he isn't into it, forget him. Life without sex, is still A LIFE.

I highly recommend a trip to the doctor for some professional advice and a check up, just to get the facts, the help you need, and a clean bill of health.

Recognize you are both very young, and need to learn and grow, with facts, not just experiments.