View Full Version : How to aproach your child after being exposed to sex on the net\ magazines
sjmx
May 24, 2009, 08:50 PM
My child was staying with family and her uncle showed her things in rude magazines[we haven't seen them since]. Since then she has used the net at friends house to look at this type of stuff how can I approach her? To explain the do's and dont's about sex and porn.
1northdakotaemt
May 25, 2009, 02:56 PM
Coulpe of questions pop into my mind first; how old is the child and how explicit do you feel the material was? It may just be that he peeked an interest and she is now trying to find out more. Is it possible that it's time for the "mother~daughter" talk? Depending on her age, an open and honest discussion about the opposite sex and bodies may be what is needed...
1northdakotaemt
May 25, 2009, 02:59 PM
I just reread my previous post and want to clarify that I was in no way trying to excuse the uncle~~in my own humble opinion, what he did was wrong and hopefully you have made him aware of your feelings and the situation you are now facing.
artlady
May 25, 2009, 03:16 PM
How old is she?
There must be age appropriate information given,if it is to be digested properly.
You begin by explaining that sex is a meaningful and beautiful experience that people who are deeply in love share to express their love in a physical way.
You continue on to explain that it is not about using or degrading anyone.
You also make sure that she is not exposed to things that she should not be exposed to .That includes what is happening at friends homes.
If computer use is not monitored in some friends home,than you should speak to the parents and ask if they are aware of that .
If they refuse to protect their child,that's their problem but I would refuse to let her go somewhere that allows that .
Tell her you are open to answer anything she wants to know about and be open.
Tell her there should be no embarrassment,sex is a natural part of life.Also ,complicated and some things she just won't be able to grasp until she is older.
Openness about sexuality should begin the moment a child asks their first sexual question.(age appropriate of course).
While you are having the discussion,it would be a good time to explain about personal boundaries and never allowing anyone to invade your space. She also need to know what her uncle did was wrong!
artlady
May 25, 2009, 03:37 PM
I am also curious as to what an adult is doing exposing a child to inappropriate material?
Have you done anything about that?
He should be facing some consequences ,and not just your not seeing him.
That is just sweeping his action under the rug.
Other children could be in danger because of him.
I think you need to take more action.
Fr_Chuck
May 25, 2009, 03:52 PM
Yes, more about what age, my answer to a 8 year old child would be different than that of a 16 year old somewhat.
Next what is the problem of just talking to the child, have you not established a open relationship were you both feel free to talk to each other openly about things.
You just explain, talking frank and blunt about the actions.
artlady
May 26, 2009, 12:19 AM
yes, more about what age, my answer to a 8 year old child would be different than that of a 16 year old somewhat.
Next what is the problem of just talking to the child, have you not established a open relationship were you both feel free to talk to each other openly about things.
You just explain, talking frank and blunt about the actions.
What about the uncle? Is this just more one more freak allowed to prey on children?
She has a responsibly to report him.
artlady
May 26, 2009, 12:53 AM
I want this out there.I want uncle in trouble.