Hi all, just a strange situation going on and would like some input. Ive been chattin to a girl and we arranged to meet up, then on the day of the date she kind of gets flaky to which I send her an email stating a few things to put her mind at rest if she was nervous about meeting me, this was a first date by the way. She text me an I told her I've just sent her an email so she read it and got it totally the wrong way, and promptly deleted me from her friends list. However a few hours later she text me asking did it say this or that, when I corrected her she said she has definatley read it the wrong way.



I just said that I wanted to clear any doubts about meeting up, which she replied with she's a trusting person an knows I isn't lyin because I've got no reason to. After this though I've no more texts or contact from her even though I've text her twice.


Any input would be great. Thanks.

Well something is up. I don't know if there was a misunderstanding or not, but either way she was clearly affected by what you said to her. If you feel comfortable enough, maybe you can copy paste the email that you sent her so that we can help you analyse the situation.

She is clearly uncomfortable around you and is sending a pretty clear message by not contacting you. You told her that it was a misunderstanding, but she's not even giving you the chance to clear it up in person. So chances are she's not interested.

1. NO TEXTING OR EMAILS!
2. When getting to know someone, you should show respect by talking to her. This text thing really has taken away a lot of the way dating should be... its just too easy to miscommunicate and takes away the effort of getting to know someone.

I don't know what you told her, you didn't really say. But from now on, date someone to get to know them, talk to them and act interested in a girl, wanting to know what makes her happy and what she wants in life, and try to give it to her. That is what dating all about... not texting and hoping she got the message, and hoping she responds back. If you talked... likes each other, set up a time to meet, meet, then talk, set up another time to meet, etc... texting screws things up!

And as a girl, when a guy texts me important stuff when dating, I HATE IT! They should care enough to want to talk... take the time... it goes a long way.

Thanks for the input, well I forgot to say that we had been talking online for two weeks before. She kept hinting for me to ask her out so I did, which she said great so we sorted out a day and a place. She said she couldn't wait to meet me, I contacted her on the day of the date over a time and that's when she got a bit flaky. The message I sent was just a brief one to put her mind at eas about meeting up. Nothing bad at all. But she said she couldn't see the screen properly and looks like she has read the message wrong.

Also, she did ask what did the message say when I told her what it said she did agree she has read it wrong, and I explained what I was getting at and she seemed OK with it.

So did she just not show up?

If you want to go out with her, CALL HER one more time, tell her you would love to take her out and if she would be interested. If she does not call you back, then that's it. No more. If she is going to act that way, then you need someone who is more willing to communicate.
What did she THINK she saw?

Being a girl and meeting people off the internet is scary. We generally thing everyone is out to serial-kill us (haha, j/k... well kind of). I'm guessing she got cold-feet. Try again and if she repeats her behavior... well then move on.

No we never got to stage of meeting up, yeah meeting someone off the internet is very scary especially for a girl, Totally understand that, and that's what I tried to explain to her. I said I am single an I isn't got kids an pointed to a works website that my pictures are on to confirm who I am. She read it as I said I not single and I have kids. Then she asked me in a message did it say that your not single and that you have kids? When I explained no, I just want ed to put your mind at ease in case you have any doubts. Really just sent it to make her feel a little bit more secure about meeting a total stranger.

I may try again, just don't want to come across a pushy or desperate by getting back in touch.

Wait a week or so, and call her. Go from there...

The problem with texting and e-mails and this type of communication is that the personal side is missing and so it is easy to take something the wrong way.

Mis communication happens because the normal things we use to gauge someone's attitude,tone of voice,body language ,etc, is missing.

You can say LOL and all of that but there is still an element that is absent that makes for misunderstanding.

My suggestions for people you're going to meet that you've met online:

1. Have a couple (at least) telephone conversations before planning to meet.
2. Meet in a public place
3. Try to meet for coffee or lunch so that it's less pressure than a Saturday evening dinner date
4. Make clear that you want to get to know each other for a while before there is any physical contact (for ladies this is important)
5. Let at least 2 friends or family members know where you're going and who you're going to meet

Thanks for the advice guys, I think imgonna have to wait and have a think on what to do next. I mean it would have been nice to meet up with her. But some of the excuses seemed a little lame to me, like she had gotten cold feet. The only thing that still confuses me is why get back in touch after she has deleted me?
And also why say that she believes me but then no more contact since? Just a bit strange I thought.