sunflower412
May 12, 2009, 01:37 PM
Hello,
I don't know what to do. I keep getting the run around from the courts, the lawyers. I am a loving mother and I need to protect my children. My exhusband and I divorced back in 2003. I was with him for 10 years and my dumb butt put up with his abuse over and over. In Oct. of 2002 he kicked me and the children out. He tells people I was out partying all night, but the real truth is he was just sick of being married. The day after that happened my sister and I went back to get the kids stuff and he had a girl there. He went after me and my sister called the cops. To make a long story short, he has never been there for my kids at ALL. I filed for child support in early 2003. As of 5/5/2009 he owes me over $34,268.00 in back child support. He was arrested and put in jail for 6 months about 2 years ago, and just 3 months ago he was arrested again. Only this time he was held over the weekend, but the judge let him out. He has not followed the court order. I have not received any payments but one for $100. I have contacted Domestic Relations and finally got them to set up a conference. Which isn't until June 30. I asked if a bench warrant was issued for him not paying within the 30 day period since that is a contempt on the court order and of course Domestics said no. The only way he will get one is if he doesn't show up to the conference. Another thing is, last May 2008 my ex moved into his grandparent's house because he doesn't work much. I used to let the kids go visit with the greatgrandparents, but unusual things starting happening. Anyway, at the court hearing I explained to the conciliator that my ex is never around. My daughter doesn't really know him because she was only 6 months old when he left. I listed all the things he hasn't done for the children and they still granted him visitation. Well he saw the kids for about 3 weeks and again stopped calling or coming. In March 2009 I received papers in the mail that the greatgrandparents are taking me to court for visitation. Keep in mind this woman basically violated my children. She let them watch sexually explicit movies. Talked to them about different things dealing with sex, in detail. My children told me this when they came home from a visit a while back. Anyway, despite of what the previous conciliator said about her not being allowed to be unsupervised with my children. This conciliator over ruled that basically and allowed her to see my kids every other Sunday. She and my ex have even said little remarks like, "we'll take off with them and you will never see the kids again" stuff like that. So I would not let the children over there. Last week my pro-bono lawyer called me and said he received a letter stating that I am being sued because I am in contempt with the order with my exhusband. My ex is telling people he calls my house all the time and I don't return his calls. HE NEVER CALLS!! Anyway. Today 5/12/09 my fiancé called me to tell me that my ex called and said, I want the kids tomorrow. And hung up the phone. My fiancé called him back and asked, "what did you say?" my ex immediately said that my fiancé f'd up and he is a 3rd party and he is not allowed to call him. Then all of a sudden I receive a phone call from my ex's lawyer. I am not allowed to speak to the other partie's lawyers. Of course my lawyer is out playing golf right now and I can't get ahold of him. But my ex and his lawyer are telling me if my ex shows up tomorrow at 5:30 and I don't hand the kids over, then he will call the cops and have me arrested. What am I suppose to do? My lawyer and I are appealing the conciliator's decision, but that takes time. I need to protect my children from this filth. When my ex did get the children for that little bit of time last year, he would go in his room and tell the children to get out and go upstairs because he was tired and wanted to sleep. My children have also told me that he'll have girls over and make the children go upstairs. To the great grandmother that was not to be alone with them. How can I protect my children from being abused? How can I protect them from being taken out of the state? I don't want to go to jail and I don't want my kids taken from me. But I am the one that has taken good care of them for all these years without the help from their dad. My fiancé has been in their lives the past 4 in a half years, and trust me when I say this, my kids call him dad because they feel that he is their dad. I never every told my kids to call him that. Especially the bond he has with my daughter. He is all she knows as a dad. My son has seen his real father hit his mom, has seen his father hit another girl, has been neglected by his father. Asked me why dad didn't call him on his birthday or christmas. PLease help me. Help me help my children. The courts always say they do what is in the best interest of the children, but they don't. Domestics isn't helping. They aren't enforcing this order like they are suppose to. I can't even transfer my child support case to the county I live in because the defendant lives in their jurisdiction. Family law is granting these sicko's what they want. No one is thinking about the children. What can I do? Please someone help me. These are my babies. Thank you for your time. I just need some good advice as to what I can do to protect them from these monsters.
I don't know what to do. I keep getting the run around from the courts, the lawyers. I am a loving mother and I need to protect my children. My exhusband and I divorced back in 2003. I was with him for 10 years and my dumb butt put up with his abuse over and over. In Oct. of 2002 he kicked me and the children out. He tells people I was out partying all night, but the real truth is he was just sick of being married. The day after that happened my sister and I went back to get the kids stuff and he had a girl there. He went after me and my sister called the cops. To make a long story short, he has never been there for my kids at ALL. I filed for child support in early 2003. As of 5/5/2009 he owes me over $34,268.00 in back child support. He was arrested and put in jail for 6 months about 2 years ago, and just 3 months ago he was arrested again. Only this time he was held over the weekend, but the judge let him out. He has not followed the court order. I have not received any payments but one for $100. I have contacted Domestic Relations and finally got them to set up a conference. Which isn't until June 30. I asked if a bench warrant was issued for him not paying within the 30 day period since that is a contempt on the court order and of course Domestics said no. The only way he will get one is if he doesn't show up to the conference. Another thing is, last May 2008 my ex moved into his grandparent's house because he doesn't work much. I used to let the kids go visit with the greatgrandparents, but unusual things starting happening. Anyway, at the court hearing I explained to the conciliator that my ex is never around. My daughter doesn't really know him because she was only 6 months old when he left. I listed all the things he hasn't done for the children and they still granted him visitation. Well he saw the kids for about 3 weeks and again stopped calling or coming. In March 2009 I received papers in the mail that the greatgrandparents are taking me to court for visitation. Keep in mind this woman basically violated my children. She let them watch sexually explicit movies. Talked to them about different things dealing with sex, in detail. My children told me this when they came home from a visit a while back. Anyway, despite of what the previous conciliator said about her not being allowed to be unsupervised with my children. This conciliator over ruled that basically and allowed her to see my kids every other Sunday. She and my ex have even said little remarks like, "we'll take off with them and you will never see the kids again" stuff like that. So I would not let the children over there. Last week my pro-bono lawyer called me and said he received a letter stating that I am being sued because I am in contempt with the order with my exhusband. My ex is telling people he calls my house all the time and I don't return his calls. HE NEVER CALLS!! Anyway. Today 5/12/09 my fiancé called me to tell me that my ex called and said, I want the kids tomorrow. And hung up the phone. My fiancé called him back and asked, "what did you say?" my ex immediately said that my fiancé f'd up and he is a 3rd party and he is not allowed to call him. Then all of a sudden I receive a phone call from my ex's lawyer. I am not allowed to speak to the other partie's lawyers. Of course my lawyer is out playing golf right now and I can't get ahold of him. But my ex and his lawyer are telling me if my ex shows up tomorrow at 5:30 and I don't hand the kids over, then he will call the cops and have me arrested. What am I suppose to do? My lawyer and I are appealing the conciliator's decision, but that takes time. I need to protect my children from this filth. When my ex did get the children for that little bit of time last year, he would go in his room and tell the children to get out and go upstairs because he was tired and wanted to sleep. My children have also told me that he'll have girls over and make the children go upstairs. To the great grandmother that was not to be alone with them. How can I protect my children from being abused? How can I protect them from being taken out of the state? I don't want to go to jail and I don't want my kids taken from me. But I am the one that has taken good care of them for all these years without the help from their dad. My fiancé has been in their lives the past 4 in a half years, and trust me when I say this, my kids call him dad because they feel that he is their dad. I never every told my kids to call him that. Especially the bond he has with my daughter. He is all she knows as a dad. My son has seen his real father hit his mom, has seen his father hit another girl, has been neglected by his father. Asked me why dad didn't call him on his birthday or christmas. PLease help me. Help me help my children. The courts always say they do what is in the best interest of the children, but they don't. Domestics isn't helping. They aren't enforcing this order like they are suppose to. I can't even transfer my child support case to the county I live in because the defendant lives in their jurisdiction. Family law is granting these sicko's what they want. No one is thinking about the children. What can I do? Please someone help me. These are my babies. Thank you for your time. I just need some good advice as to what I can do to protect them from these monsters.