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heidijoanne
May 11, 2009, 03:48 PM
What do you think are the behaviours of controlling people?
In Both Men and Women

bladerecon
May 11, 2009, 04:00 PM
People that demand instead of asking, Don't give you a choice in the matter and when they do, they make you feel guilty if you don't side with them. They have to have the last word in every conversation and they have to always be right, even if they are wrong. Hope this helps

Justwantfair
May 11, 2009, 04:05 PM
There are a lot of behaviors of controlling people.

Most start suddle with small remarks that damage your self-esteem.

Some people use manipulation to control their partners, leading the other partner to believe anything that happens is 'their fault'.

Some people use violence to control their partners.

There are many levels of manipulation, control and abuse.

In a relationship, you want to be loved for who you are, just the way you are, as you should love your partner. You want to be hear and listen. You want to be a partner, not be stand behind or in front of anyone. You want to be treated with respect, no matter your partners own personal insecurities. These are the things that happen in happy, healthy relationships.

While no relationship is perfect, you must always strive to compliment (in all ways - not just a verbal) your counterpart.

ajGambino
May 11, 2009, 04:05 PM
Showing insecurity and distrust to someone.

Bladeerecon has the just of it.

heidijoanne
May 14, 2009, 06:32 PM
Thanks Everyone... bang on!

Survivor07
May 14, 2009, 07:32 PM
Someone who wants to know your every move and who you talked to every minute of the day.

It does start subtly. Just little comments that over time, wear you down. They manipulate.

They're jealous and insecure people who have no control over themselves.

BlackVY
May 14, 2009, 08:00 PM
Wow!

All replies here are describing me exactly... I must be very very controlling. :(

BlackVY
May 14, 2009, 08:17 PM
Thanks jenniepepsi

I just hope its not too late... I don't want to be like this...

heidijoanne
May 15, 2009, 02:20 PM
Never to late!

BlackVY
May 17, 2009, 03:58 PM
Thanks a lot...

Let me give you some insight into controlling people like myself

We don't mean to be controlling, like a dictator, but we just want things done our way. We think its better than anything anyone else could come up with. We think we are always right and therefore, things have to be done our way.

Personally, when I'm with a girl, and if I'm controlling her, it is because I don't believe she will do the right thing or will make mistakes that may hurt me, so to protect myself, I control. That's a bad thing, because then I'm not dating the girl for who she is. She pretty much becomes my puppet, so who am I dating then? Myself in their body? That's quite sick.

I need to learn to trust people more, give them freedom and choice, not control them but let them do what they like. That's he way it should be. They should be themselves and if I am with them, I should be with them for who they are, not how they are when I pull their strings.