I was seeing a fantastic man for quite a few months - we completely hit it off upon meeting initially, but had been talking for weeks before this. We had so much in common and our conversations never seemed to have an end. It was amazing and I felt incredibly drawn and so intrigued by him. He had told me he felt the same way, and when we finally met in person it was clear the physical attraction was mutual as well.

Things seemed to be off to a pretty great start, and it really seemed like we were enjoying eachother's company. We would talk and text long into the wee hours of the morning. As weeks went on, the sexual chemistry and attraction between us was overpowering and we couldn't keep our hands off each other every single time we'd meet up. It was absolutely amazing. The way he'd look at me, the way he'd touch me. I've been in flings where it was purely JUST sex - but this was different. The way he'd look deeply into my eyes and smile, it was clear the connection was dwelling deeper than physical.

I noticed shortly after a about of these spontaneous and frequent sexual experiences, other things started to teeter off. We talked less, we saw each other less, it had me wondering what was going on. I was confused because he was telling me about how he'd been sharing with his family details about us, and his friends also. (I had already met his friends too) I had no idea what went wrong especially since it was VERY obvious between us that chemistry was evident and the connection was there. We were always very clear to each other how we felt and the attraction we had.

I felt it was time I shared with him my feelings, as I was starting to fall for him deeply. His response was not what I had been expecting and it crushed me completely. He said that I was beautiful, and that I was funny and amazing and down-to-earth. And of course, that I drove him absolutely wild in bed. BUT... he just didn't feel the spark between us. He of course, wanted to stay friends and said he'd be upset if I decided never to speak to him again, but that'd he'd understand.

I call bull. If there was no spark, we wouldn't have had initial attraction, we wouldn't have any sort of connection, let alone the physical aspect of it. Esp. since the sexual chemistry was as strong as it was between us.

Please someone tell me this was his 'easy way out'? Something isn't adding up for me. I haven't spoken to him for about a month.

From what you've told us, it does seem that you had an attraction early on in your relationship, but often times the spark just disappears. It sucks, but that's just the way it goes. I'm really sorry to hear about these change of feelings from his part.

The fact that he hasn't look for you in about a month already shows that he's not as interested in you as before.

The part that is shocking you the most is that your feelings haven't changed, but his has. You're just going to have to accept that and do your best to move on.

Don't assume his feelings are as intense as yours. He has changed and you have not. That's human. But that's why it doesn't add up to you.

I don't think he loved you in the first place. He just wanted to see how it would feel to have sex with you and after that its not a challenge to him anymore and his feelings changed. The relationship is clearly over so move on and disappear from his life.

Your experience sounds very similar to a few my friend has had through online dating and it just recently happened again to her for the 3rd time. All these relationships started hot and heavy and then peetered off in the 2nd to 3rd month with the guy either disappearing or saying something like "I only date jewish girls" and she's not jewish! Why date her in the first place? The latest one looked serious and he introduced her to his friends and family and then all of the sudden he was starting a new 'real estate business' and dropped off the planet only to call her sporadically every couple of weeks or so.
I think a reasonable conclusion here with online dating is that you have to be very careful of guys who 'troll' the internet to meet women and not that they are all bad but that you need to make sure you take your time dating one or two of them without getting sexual right when you meet. There are many guys that are serial daters and use the internet line up women to do this with so they are always experiencing the 'high' of a new relationship and then repeat the whole cycle every couple of months or so. Women like you and my friend who are very eager to meet someone can easily fall prey to this because they say all the right things and you are wanting so badly to believe that you miss important red flags: He shouldn't be telling you he loves you off some online conversations and you bought it- he had you primed, ready, and right where he wanted you. You also ignored other red flags like the sexual part of the relationship being great yet he wasn't making the kind of effort in other areas (contacts you less and less) so you confused sexual chemistry with an intent to build a relationship.
I suspect that this is not new behavior for him.

Well I'm afraid I let down my guard with him too quickly.. although I'd like to think I'm a pretty good judge of character - he completely played me for a fool this time around.

I do have to say though, I've had success with meeting potential mates through the net. My ex-boyfriend and I dated for 4 years and lived together for 2. It is possible to find success through online dating for some skeptics out there!

Thanks for all the insight - I do have to clarify.. I never loved him or was in love. It was merely infatuation but it was growing to a different stage right before it ended. Which, as I see now, was probably for the best.