hey my name is anna :) I am new to this site. Anyway I am 18 years old an I am going out with someone who is 32 anyway he is the best person that has happened to me I have been with himoer a year now and I just can't bring myself to tell my parents you have any ideas ow I can? x:confused:

PROCEED WITH CAUTION

You are legally allowed to be together, but take it slow. He's much older and has much more experience than you. Don't let him pressure you to do anything that you are uncomfortable with.

All you can do is suss it out.
You must know how they feel about you dating,so,slowly introduce the topic of your boyfriend,he's someone you like,if you get along with your mother,you could start by asking her about how she met your father,was it romantic,etc.then say there is someone you like,his name is,etc... the only thing is they will more then likely want to meet him.. check him out so to speck!.

Like I wish said; I would also preseed with caution. He is 14 years older then you. That is 14 years with more living, more experience and so on. Also the age difference is so great that I understand if your parents get skeptical. I must admit I am a bit tempted to say something more on the age difference, but I'm going to let it be.

But redheads advice is good! If you are close to your mom it is a good idea, to kind of ease it in there... to talk about him with her and tell her about him. That way she might have a good first impression when/if she meets him.

Lets face it, your parent might or might not be against you dating this guy because of his age.

However, you're an adult and hopefully they raised you with enough common sense to make the right choices.

Also, life is about living and learning from your own mistakes. So I hope your doing the right thing and I hope he is treating you well.

Thanks everyone for your responses x

Hello I have a boyfriend but he has a child with his ex girlfriend but he doesn't want to see the child or ever talks about his child he hasn't seen his child for over a year do you no why this may be ?:confused:

Maybe worthless father?? I mean lets be seriouds any real father would push about seeing their child, talk to his ex to try to see how the child is doing something... Even if they broke up on bad term or had other problems he should not make his child suffer.. or it may be another issue what do you think you live with him could it be he was abusive sexually or physically any of those things it could be a number of issues just ask if you want to know...

Hey mom hey dad I got a new boyfriend he is mature he is 32 I really don't think they will care as long as you are happy as you say you are age is only an number

I've asked him but he says his ex woudnt let him be a dad so why should he bother now? And that every time she gets a new boyfriend the child calls them dad

OK then

ive asked him but he says his ex woudnt let him be a dad so why should he bother now? and that everytime she gets a new bf the child calls them dadHoney that is a cop-out he is a father and that is that does he pay child support, he has rights whether he takes those rights is up to him... I responded to another post we are talking about same guy... hmmm I don't see him as being that great when he is not stepping up for his child

No he did actually pay for child support money but his ex told him to stop paying it as she doesn't want notthing to do with him or the baby and he use to do everything for the child but now she says go away to him and tells the child he isn't her dad

Did they got to court for child support?
Did the Ex- serve him papers?

If he strongly felt he might not be the dad then he should've address this issue a long time ago.

If he really wanted to be a dad then he would be on. Nobody couldn't take me out of my kids life while I am still walking this earth. My daughter's father always told me that. He goes to court and file for visitation rights to ensure he's going see his child.

At no time should he ever stop paying child support because his child's mother told him not to. I bet you somewhere down the line she'll take him to court for not paying it then he would have to pay it all back and risk getting in trouble. I bet she would even deny she told him such a thing.

You should want more out of a man.

No he does pay she just won't take it off him so it not his fault and he doesn't deny it isn't his child he just can't botherd anymore because he's tried as hard as he can

My man is the best man I could ever want he been there for me wenever I need him he cares about everyone there is notthing wrong with him and he finished his ex because she cheated and I'm and treated him like crap

He has rights to visitation of the child that can be enforced by the courts. If he is not enforcing those rights (that have absolutely NOTHING to do with the mother) then he is nothing more then a dead beat and you should expect nothing more from him, should you turn up pregnant.

BTW, being a deadbeat, DOES NOT make him the best man ever. There is no excuse for not taking care of your obligations.

Not being funny but no one understands what am saying I'm saying he has tried everything notthing works and this is what he gets called


None of use understand at all he has tried everything notthing works and this is what he gets called. AND HE IS THE BEST MAN least he tries

He takes his ex back to court to see his child. That isn't hard.

First you say, "he is the best man", than you say, "well at least he tries to be". Which one is it because I don't think he is being all he can be to hiw child. I guess it is easier to give up then to fight.

It is not up to the mother to forbid him contact with his son.
He needs to think of the long term ramifications of not being in his child's life and overcome any obstacles she may throw in his path.

Unless she can prove to family court that a relationship with the father would be detrimental to the son,she has no right to keep them separated.

He needs to petition the court for visitation.There is also mediation through family court and while it is voluntary,it is often helpful to have an objective third party help when the parents do not agree.

He needs to try a little harder and take himself to the court house write out the child support papers himself... That is what my husband did. SHE WILL HAVE TO COME TO AN AGREEMENT for visitation. He does not have to give her the money he can send it through the courts. Then it will be documented that he is paying and later on will not get in trouble. Let it sit there if she does not want it. Well the child can collect it later. That way when the child gets older they will know he did his part. And he will be able to see his child

OK thanks daddys girl yo talk sense instead of bitting my head of and saying he doesn't try I should no I have been with him for long enough

ok thanks daddys girl yo talk sense instead of bitting my head of and saying he doesnt try i should no i have been with him for long enough

Everyone has told you that. He needs to enforce his rights because he hasn't done everything he can. He has equal rights to the mother, he isn't doing anything right to enforce his rights.

That is on him, not on her. He has to go to the courthouse and fight for his child.

ok thanks daddys girl yo talk sense instead of bitting my head of and saying he doesnt try i should no i have been with him for long enough

No problem... but yea like everyone is saying... even though them two are not together they both have EQUAL rights as the child's parents. Remember that

Yes he has done that and notthing has happened

He has gone to court and filed for visitation?

Yep and she still won't let him see her

What did the court order for visitation?

That he see her every other weekend

Then he takes her to court for not obey the court order for visitation.

It's contempt of court and he goes back and lets the court know that the mother is not complying.

He can only handle this through court since the mother is not willing to put the child first, the court will force her to.

He said he isn't going to win so what the point

There isn't anything to win.

If she is not complying with the court order, it's contempt, they will force her to give every other weekend for visitation or she will go to jail.

Yes he said he won't win the courts because he's been there so many times

There isn't anything for him to win.

Don't know what other advice to offer. I would never stop fighting for my children and it sounds like he would prefer to give up.

Oh well he has tried what he can possibly do one day when we have children there will notthing like that as am fair and not like that psycho

If you have children one day, he will be just as likely to not take any responsibility following a break up as he has with his last relationship.

That is your choice, but do not be offended when people call it like they see it. It is pure laziness that keeps him from participating in his child's life and if he is convinced that the mother is psycho (as I am sure he will tell his next g/f about you) then you should want to intercede in order to give stability to this child's life. There isn't any excuse for abandonment.

For one he didn't say she was psycho I have seen it for 2 it isn't laziness we have spend ££££ on this we can't afford anything else

To see my child I would spend every last ££££ I had.

I have spent over $12,000.00 in the last six years fighting for my daughter, so don't think you are alone in doting to do the right thing for a child!

Why are you spending money, you apparently haven't had counsel, what are you paying for? Besides the child support?

Hey I'm just updating I have told me mum about my relationship in June 2009 and she was fine with it and life is going great with him couldn't be happier getting house this year but thanks everyone for your advice :)